Aibu to not want to move up north

[time2changeCharlieBrown]

My dh has been offered a great job opportunity a high payrise
the catch is we have to relocate up north near Leeds
so my main concerns is the weather
I hate winter, rain and snow and up there seems to get more?
also I joined a few online community groups recently to get a feel for it and learn about the areas and what’s around
all I have mainly seen is awful things about robbery’s and car theft and violent crimes! It’s really putting me off!
we have a son who is not too far off an age to go clubbing and for nights out and even though he is 6 foot 5 he’s very striking looking mixed race (Greek) and I worry about him being a target and our eldest daughter too also very striking ,but both quite naive as we currently live in a small village and don’t often go into big cities and they are at small schools.
my dh is from a different town up north not too far from Leeds still has friends there and says it’s fine and all city’s are the same and the kids will be fine as not in any gangs and unlikely to be. I am a worrier so Aibu to not want to move?

Wow you’re not planning on moving to Iraq! Get a grip, it’s Leeds not a war zone. I don’t know where you’ve been living, but everywhere in the U.K. is the same these days! Leeds is no better or worse than anywhere else. It’s ridiculous you’d scupper your dh better job because you’re basically a snob about ‘living up north’!

As anywhere, you get good and bad neighbourhoods, especially in cities. I live much further north than Leeds and yes weather is a bit colder but I like it! I couldn't bear to live an an inner city further south which has no 20 minute getaway to the beach or countryside.

Just choose wisely and you have the opportunity to move again. We have Google now, move to a suburb, further out, possibly even more north! 😳

Lol yes, Leeds isn't really north! X

I can't get over how cheap the trains are son pays £5.40 return day. We're at least £2 dearer. Cinema tickets are £3 dearer. My son visits the fish market regularly. We don't have markets 🥺

@Simonsignoret I know, I am one!

Yorkshire is a beautiful county, I love it and I was born in Lancashire. It’s not called God’s own county for nothing.

There are so many lovely small towns and villages to live in. The countryside is fabulous and then you have gorgeous seaside as well. Given the chance, I would move there tomorrow.

Why do people assume 'it's grim oop North?!'

Because they still of the mindset of the 1950's basically. It's the British class thing too.

However, with teenage kids I wouldn't be moving to a village anywhere, they need to get out and about in a town or city. So important for their socialisation and opportunities, work, study, learning how to navigate life etc. (Ain't going to happen with a non-existant public transport system or mum/dad taxi in a tiny village).

You can always move to a village when they've flown the nest.

If they have Greek biracial background, a city is a much better option. I have a biracial adult child myself. Cities are always better for him for his upbringing than the narrow-minded village my parents lived in, even though everybody loved him there, there was no opportunity for his future. We only went to visit. he was a walking head-turner lol

I brought him up in the city I settled in. He's travelled the world after doing a great study.
Just my 2 cents.

The north is slightly colder than the south. Leeds is not particularly rainy (unlike Manchester!) and unless you live in the dales you won’t see much snow. I lived in Leeds for several years and it is very multicultural. Some areas are rough and I would not feel safe whatever colour you are. There are lovely places commutable to Leeds if you prefer a village or smaller town feel. Harrogate and York are beautiful and really awesome places to live.

They ate already in a village .

However, with teenage kids I wouldn't be moving to a village anywhere, they need to get out and about in a town or city. So important for their socialisation and opportunities, work, study, learning how to navigate life etc. (Ain't going to happen with a non-existant public transport system or mum/dad taxi in a tiny village).

You know lots of teenagers live in villages yeah?

Leeds isn't really north!

It's in the north of England

Northerner here from the other side of the penines.

You make it sound like being up north is terrible! How wrong you are, its beautiful. Find a village in Yorkshire or Lancashire and you wont look back. Friendly as F people.

Sure there's crime but no more than anywhere else - who'd live in London?

And you'll probably be able to buy a bigger property with more land than where you are now.

Ref the weather, it's never bothered me because everyone gets on with it no matter the weather.

Talk to a couple of estate agents to find you your ideal home. Your DH may even get relocation assistance 😁

I moved south for my career, but I'm going home for my retirement, I have so missed the north.

I would consider Ilkley or the villages around there, 30 minutes on the train and a lovely small town. Skipton also nice but a little further out. Otley is lovely too but no station.

I know I’ll eat my hat it seems I’m so very very wrong!
I am now looking forward to our long weekend we’ve tagged extra days on to our trip now because of this thread and all the places recommended I have to say it’s now sounds much more appealing to the little place we’re currently in!
I think it’s time to change and I’m not longer feeling so anxious or worried about it

Another vote for Leeds- as cities go its probably nicer than some others as it's not a big city. Your children will have different opportunities to a small village. I came to Leeds to go to uni, and 20 years later I'm still here with my own family.

It’s Leeds, not Devils Island. But I’d advise you not to move there as you’re so blasé about causing offence to a large swathe of the country with your ninny-ish prejudices

I don't like London
This statement tells me all I need to know. What bits of London precisely?
Wimbledon, Kew, Islington?
Such small minded views.

Just the business, I don’t like any city to live in I prefer less crowded areas I don’t like crowds.
there are some lovely places to see in London but the crowds and tubes were something that I found overwhelming and felt on edge
I am aware that others will love the business and crowds and atmosphere but I do not

Honestly if this is how you feel you will love it up there! We have taken to holidaying up North for a few years now. Never seen anything as beautiful and peaceful as the dales. (The moors and the lakes come close though).

Just back from a couple of weeks in York...amazing. Though I think my heart may be lancastrian

Can't move for practical reasons but I think it may well be in our future (Bolton Abbey is the dream)

I'm also a southerner who was living in the southwest and felt nervous when my DH got a job, too good to refuse, in Leeds. I knew nothing about Leeds or the north. Imagined it was grim up north, deprived, and crime-ridden.
We went up to look around, and I was pretty certain I'd hate it. What a pleasant surprise! I love the grandeur of Leeds. The big impressive, Victorian buildings, the beautiful Victorian arcades, the wonderful cafes and restaurants, the culture (theatre, ballet, opera, museums). I loved the market, the corn exchange, and the tiled cafe in the art gallery.
I'd suggest you look at areas like Far Headingley, Weetwood, and Adel if you don't like crowds and cities. They're very peaceful and have plenty of large, green open spaces within walking distance.
I live in Weetwood and can walk to three large parks and woods from my house. I can also get frequent buses to the city.
I was tempted by somewhere like Ilkley or a smaller village, but I have a 13 year old and an 11 year old. I'm glad we stayed near the city as there's sooo much for them to do in Leeds. Where we live also has a village feel and close access to the countryside, so I feel we have the best of both worlds - nature and city depending on our mood!

I wish people would read the OP updates, she’s very much done an about turn on her visit!

Enjoy your trip, when are you coming?

Think this will be us 😂

Thank you ☺️
the end of this week! was supposed to be two nights but have extended it to four now! As too many places to see it will be very busy in deed! The forcast actually looks good too 😊

Interesting and somewhat depressing as I'm located in the rainy bit,Thanks