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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Bf keeps calling me lazy

39 replies

Jellyfishy20 · 25/08/2024 10:51

so I was diagnosed with pcos around three months ago and despite taking folate and iron tablets I am always tired, I could fall asleep the minute I’ve got out of bed and I have no energy to the point it’s been making me have bad thoughts. Last Tuesday I was diagnosed with sleep apnea so now I am waiting for my cpap machine, my boyfriend keeps calling me lazy and saying how I’m lucky to have him as nobody else would want to be with me and it’s really hurting my feelings. I keep telling him once I get my cpap machine I should have more energy and I can get up and take the dog for a wee in the morning but he just says how he’s more tired than I am and how lazy I am (I take the dog out for a walk during the day it’s just in the morning I can’t get out of bed) I feel like I haven’t had any support from him and it seems like recently everything is just falling apart. AIBU for wanting him to be more understanding?

OP posts:
LlynTegid · 25/08/2024 10:51

There is no crime in being single.

violetsparkle · 25/08/2024 10:52

Leave him. He doesn't love you. I'm sorry.

Take care

theduchessofspork · 25/08/2024 10:53

It sounds like you have more important things to focus on than him. I would get rid.

TheSmallAssassin · 25/08/2024 10:55

You aren't lucky to have him.

TheShellBeach · 25/08/2024 10:55

Seriously, what are his good points?
He doesn't sound very kind or supportive.
I'm sorry you're in this situation. Can you leave him? Have you been together a long time - any children?

ThinWomansBrain · 25/08/2024 10:56

he should use his energy packing & moving out

Wwyd2025 · 25/08/2024 10:57

He doesn't love you, leave him.

Shinyandnew1 · 25/08/2024 10:57

He sounds like an arse!

What’s your financial/housing situation-can you move out and live independently?

Gilbertwasawuss · 25/08/2024 10:58

Leave him.

Your PCOS and tiredness have just brought to light his character.

I bet if you weren't struggling with this now, he would have shown his true colours when you got pregnant etc

Count yourself lucky he is only a boyfriend and get rid.

Catza · 25/08/2024 10:58

He is not going to be more supportive. Bin him.
I work with people with chronic health conditions and unsupportive relatives are the most common reason for distress and hugely impact on recovery and quality of life. You are not married and he is being really nasty and borderline abusive ("Nobody will love you as I do" is a classic abuser line).
Stand up for yourself. There are decent blokes out there.

Takeoutyourhen · 25/08/2024 10:59

What a supportive bf. NOT.
Get rid and have a good recovery without this unnecessary person bringing you down.

BeeCucumber · 25/08/2024 10:59

Anyone that says that you are lucky to have them is an abuser. Leave.

Sheeplesss · 25/08/2024 11:00

He sounds very nasty.
Can you pack up and leave?
This is who he is.
You need to leave.
He sounds potentially abusive.

Takeoutyourhen · 25/08/2024 11:00

Agree with PP. He probably also enjoys the fact that you are vulnerable as he can exhibit more control and mindfuckery.

AmayaBuzzbee · 25/08/2024 11:03

YABU being in a relationship with somebody who has no respect for you, and who does not care about you.

Butwhybecause · 25/08/2024 11:04

No, you are not lucky to have him, he's dragging you down when you need support and he'll only get worse.

Tell him to leave or make arrangements to leave him.

On a practical note, have you had a blood test to check your iron levels and to make sure there's nothing else going besides pcos to stop you absorbing iron? Ask at your surgery.

Bekindtoyourselfandothers · 25/08/2024 11:22

What an absolutely horrible man.
Blaming you for your ill health.
Agree with pp you would be much better off without him.

GingerPirate · 25/08/2024 11:42

Why have this twat in your life?
A "boyfriend"? Focus on yourself and give yourself
as much as your own pace in life as practically possible.
You'll feel better.

Bananalanacake · 25/08/2024 11:50

Who owns the property you live in, does he have a claim on the house, could you easily kick him out. You can have a relationship without living together but he sounds like a selfish git so I' get rid.

Skybluepinky · 25/08/2024 12:27

Leave him.

Wavescrashingonthebeach · 25/08/2024 12:29

AmayaBuzzbee · 25/08/2024 11:03

YABU being in a relationship with somebody who has no respect for you, and who does not care about you.

Took the words right out of my mouth!

bubblesummerxx · 25/08/2024 12:29

I get his frustration but don't agree with how he's putting it across to you

OKherewegoagain · 25/08/2024 12:30

Jeez what a prince , get rid ASAP.

FadedRed · 25/08/2024 12:31

Please summon sufficient energy to tell him to fuck off. You’ll find your life far less stressful without this unsupportive joy-sponge in it.

Wavescrashingonthebeach · 25/08/2024 12:32

Dump him and put ALL your energy into YOU!
You mind find once you get this piece of shit out your life you get a tiny energy boost.
In all seriousness though, chronic fatigue caused by long term conditions is really difficult, you HAVE to put yourself first or you could burn out and make your conditions worse.

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