I'm a nanny with my own baby - what should I charge?

[Vizella]

Hi all,

I am a single mother of a 1.5 year old DS whom I've committed to looking after until he's 3 - I believe in prioritising his needs above my career, etc etc. I live with my parents at the moment, that's how I can afford it.

However, I am eating into my savings and would like to make some income as an after-school nanny so that I don't deplete all of my savings. Otherwise, I might have to go back to work and I don't want to do that.

My question is, would parents be okay with me looking after their children while I bring my DS along - he is well-behaved and bright, not the type to run around tearing things down - and also, should I charge slightly less or the same hourly rate?

So, in London, nannies charge about £15 net per hour, should I charge £10-12 per hour?

Thanks for your advice (and sorry if any of this offends some of you - no idea how lol, but you never know).

I had a nanny with own child. She was well-qualified and a good fit for my kids (and a lovely person), and had been their nanny before having her own child. It was fine. I would suggest charging 2/3 of the going rate but I think you would need to expect to make food for the children.

You don’t need to explain your priorities to your prospective employers. Some of us can’t live with our parents and prioritise our children by keeping a roof over their heads, and find commentary like that hurtful because of the inherent criticism. So, be sure to be tactful in discussing this with employers.

Ah yes, no reason at all it has to be the person whose body the child lived inside for the first nine months of their life, whose eyes they gazed into while being fed by that same body. It couldn’t be that with their mother is the natural place for a young child to be, and that the mother has a unique and exclusive role for that child’s emotional wellbeing. No reason at all.

I agree, in the very early days. But not for 3 years.

My mother went back to work in the evenings when I was 2 weeks old. My dad was an equal parent to me from that early stage. It was an absolute gift.

I made sure that other than feeding DD (I exclusively expressed for a year when breastfeeding didn’t work for us) DH was equally capable of meeting all of her needs from day 1 as well.

Two parents with equal dedication and capability is surely better than one.

Honestly people on mumsnet have lost their mind with this kind of stuff. God forbid a mother wants to look after her own children while they’re little. I was accused on another thread of ruining the economy for not wanting to go back to work full time after my mat leave. Can’t voice any negative opinions about nurseries as it’s seen as personal attack on people who use them.

Working parents - mothers and fathers are still the providers of emotional support (although never a big issue with DT’s) but can have successful careers and be successful at parenting.

Advertise honestly. Have the required certifications. Have plans and be prepared to talk about them. It won’t suit every parent - but honestly some parents need a warm body to satisfy legal requirements that their child is supervised. Others need someone to drive their child between their various afterschool activities.

You might find that cost isn’t the main factor. It could be that if you can be flexible (your child is with you so you aren’t rushing to go pick him up) with finish times, sometimes staying late or finishing early, or of you can do the days they want, if you don’t expect to be paid if you aren’t working with a given notice etc. For others, saving 5/day could make a big difference to what they can afford.

Honestly people on mumsnet have lost their mind with this kind of stuff. God forbid a mother wants to look after her own children while they’re little. I was accused on another thread of ruining the economy for not wanting to go back to work full time after my mat leave. Can’t voice any negative opinions about nurseries as it’s seen as personal attack on people who use them.

Interesting how you don't like criticism, yet are happy to do the same. Opinions only go both ways, suddenly when someone 'accuses' you of something it's not on.

People have to work to live. Toddlers benefit from fun activities, social interaction and bonding with other adults. And parents (especially single ones) benefit from time away.

But a lot of the time when someone talks about the benefits of keeping kids at home until 3 it’s not aimed at the working parent. If you don’t believe in it or need/prefer your kid at nursery, just ignore and move on. No need to be upset and always argue your point by saying stuff like “Toddlers benefit from fun activities, social interaction and bonding with other adults.” which sounds like you’re trying to convince yourself of this.

Exactly.

I didn’t breastfeed so DH would do just as much feeding in the early days too.

Given the low breastfeeding rates in the U.K., that’s a ridiculous reason. I agree in the early days, it is very much the fourth trimester. A fully weaned 2.5 year old doesn’t need their mother. A father or grandparent or other carer is just as suitable to meet needs.

As for the heating up food only, a lot of mums I know pre made the child's dinner, left it in the fridge then after school nanny heated it up. Not sure why some are saying this is so uncommon....