If you never used to enjoy sex, how did you start enjoying it?

[Helpabojttown]

I think I must be very strange. I’m 28 years old and I’ve never enjoyed sex.

I enjoy oral, but never vaginal. sex doesn’t hurt as such, but it does feel very tight and even when my body adjust it just doesn’t bring me any pleasure.

I’ve seen the doctor and have no medical issues there.

if you learnt to enjoy sex after not being fussed before, what’s your secret?

I gave up on men and switched to women! Not looked back since! I found sex with men to be ok at best, but usually uncomfortable and unsatisfactory. Being with someone who actually understands how a woman's body works and cares as much about pleasing me as experiencing pleasure themselves is a revelation. So many men seem to think women love being pounded away for at, but I find it boring and often quite painful.

Previously it was bad sexual partners for me. Porn has meant soooooo many men are rubbish at Sex and communicating.

For me I like a bullet vibrator on my clitorus whilst my partner is inside piv or fingers. Usually from behind but other positions too. Helps that he learns my rhythm and signs. Is you partner in sync with you in those ways? Can you comfortably tell them in the moment left right slow fast stop etc ?

I'd be interested in knowing how exactly perhaps technique wise those that love oral are enjoying it. It's never been something I've loved. It's so difficult to know without discussing and comparing notes if it's a me thing or a technique thing.

Yes I imagine it must be. Sorry I should have said that.

Sorry if this is TMI but I’ve only discovered that I enjoy oral with my current partner, and it’s when we’re in the 69 position. Something about the angle feels amazing for me

All of this

I saw this today and thought it's useful. Most women don't come from PIV sex.

www.instagram.com/reel/C-8lKbwJeGn/?utm_source=ig_web_button_share_sheet&igsh=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==

Oh that's interesting I'll definitely be trying that! thank you

Sorry if this is tmi but if I were you I'd try doing this for a while until you're almost "there" and then stop, flip around and try having penetrative sex to see if that works for you. This is basically how I orgasm from sex, although for me it doesn't have to be a 69 first but just general oral/foreplay.

I'm the other way around. I've always enjoyed sex. Always been able to climax through piv. But not now. My current partner is rubbish in bed and he can't get me there.
Not sure what to do about it though.

Had a partner who was interested in my pleasure and not just his own.

Was a bit mind blowing honestly

Also the book Come as you Are is really good. I found this very helpful. I do still have a low sex drive.

Oh yeah and hormonal contraception kills my libido too. Highly inconvenient.

I had a c section and piv noticeably better for me too- no idea why, I assumed hormonal.

Thought it was me / my fault.
Husband left.
Discovered I like sex. Really like it. Just not with him

You never enjoyed sex because you had shit male partners. I recommend mindful masturbation and clit vibrator, plus, expanding your sexual horizons to consider sex with women

@Helpabojttown “no kids yet, good to know it can improve after that!”

Unfortunately there tends to be less opportunity for quite a while after!! And as a PP pointed out, if you have a c-section it doesn’t apply.

most women only orgasm from clitoral stimulation. so either you or him try that during

Sex better for me after kids too - both C-section. I put it down to motherhood giving me more confidence and fewer inhibitions! But maybe it's hormonal?

Split up with my ex and got a new partner who was much more giving!