AIBU to want to wear a mask again in my classroom

[EmsHugs]

Would like to know AIBU to not give in to this parent demand.

I am in my second trimester but still quite small so not told many people as we still have some tests etc and i am listed as high risk. It is my first pregnancy after years of infertility, failed IVf and and I am being super cautious. Before the summer when I was in the early weeks of my pregnancy I caught covid and was very ill so since returning to school I have chosen to wear a mask, particularly as I have still to get several of the vaccinations like flu, whooping cough etc.

A parent of a child has put in a complaint and said I should remove the mask because it makes their child anxious but I have said while I am sorry their child does not like the mask, due to current health issues I will not. They have now made accusations that I am a poor teacher and not respectful of their child's issues, however as a high school teacher I have over 500 pupils in and out my classroom every week and want to every precaution I can to protect my baby. The school are aware why I am doing this and said they will explain to the parent but several of my colleagues, friends and family members are still not awaresi am pregnant so I do not particularly feel I should have to divulge this to a parent and that stating my health concerns should be sufficient. I have even sat with the child and explained that I wear the mask to protect myself and that I need to wear it for now but that may change later but I appreciate them being understanding. The pupil seemed to be okay but the parent continues to be adament and I believe it is because I have immediately not given into them and stood my ground.

The stress of this parent sending complaints everytime this child is in my class 4 times a week, is getting me very stressed so I would like to know:

AIBU to not divulge at the moment the reason I need to wear a mask
AINBU the parent needs to realise they cannot get everything they want.

If you want to wear a mask, then wear one. You can still teach effectively with one on.
As for the usefulness of masks, that’s another story.

As you can have your vaccinations next month I’d carry on wearing your mask until they’ve kicked in.
No student has complained your mask wearing impacts on their learning have they? That’s the only reason not to wear one. Some kids might have problems , flashbacks to Covid lockdowns , but sometimes facing up and accepting the explanation that it’s just to protect you in the short term might help them overcome any fears.
Hope all goes well over the coming months.

Mumsnet was taken over by anti-vaxers. Ignore them. You are doing nothing wrong. Good masks are protective for the wearer and the complainant has no right to any medical information. If possible the school should move the child to another class so you dont have continued harassment from an idiot.

Also people expecting the world to accommodate any and varied anxieties are doing their children no favours. Yanbu

I'm so shocked at the number of people saying you're being unreasonable.

Wear your mask! You're not doing anything hugely offensive and you should have every right to do so.

It's only for a few months anyway. You won't still be wearing it when you come back from maternity leave.

It's a high school not a primary school so the pupils should be able to understand and not let it affect them that much. Adapting to other people's needs and conditions is an important lesson to learn. What if a teacher became visually impaired and had to cover their eyes would that be too off putting for the pupils so they'd need to leave teaching?

Sounds like it's the parent's issue rather than the child's anyways.

Your facial expressions are important for children to read, for communication. Children with a hearing loss, rely on reading lips. I do think you're being unreasonable for wearing a mask. You're a teacher and you're there for the children.

Masks tend to be more useful if you are the ill one stops you spreading. An N90 provides you with some protection but frankly go and see your GP or phone them and advise you need flu jab as min. if you recently had covid shldnt need a covid jab as immunity will come from having fought it off.

In terms of class - lots of hand sanitiser on entry for all, keep your distance from the kids, wipe down the front area of class each day at start of day, lunch time and home time. Personally in my view wld be doing this anyway as schools full of viruses and cleaners don't clean properly - mostly as they don't have enough time

Some of the other replies on here need to go back to basic science class though.

Yes, this! Is your husband wearing a mask at work to protect him in order to protect you??

How dare you make assumptions like that and tell me I am half arsing my job. We have case conferences for every one of our pupils with any language disorders and PLPs for each one. I have learnt sign language to communicate with deaf students and every single powerpoint or resource I make has audio and subtitles to support learners.
If I had pupils like your child I would have a plan in place but I do not. I hardly flicked through an SEN file and hoped for the best Of my new pupils coming in, I have spoken to the p7 transition lead we have and made sure those who need that additional support are in other classes so they do not lose a teacher half way through the year that knows them well when I go on mat leave. Meanwhile it is a mask, they can still see body language and some expression, further more I would make it my priority to go and double check with your child that there was no mis understanding

I can't say whether wearing a mask in your case is necessary or helpful, but the parent is being unreasonable to ask you to remove it. Your health concerns are none of her business and you have every right to protect your health and precious baby in any way you see fit. If her child has a phobia of people in masks then they need to seek treatment for it - lots of people use masks for non covid reasons like dentist and builders so it'll be a tough fear to live with if not addressed.

The communications issue can be worked around if there is an problem for a specific child like in any other circumstance. Not every teacher can talk 'perfectly' at 50 decibels RP - there are plenty with throat issues, speech impediments, even different accents can make it more challenging for some kids to listen to and understand. We work around it.

I’m a bit torn because I don’t think masks are ideal for teaching in but equally I think the parents are ridiculously unreasonable.

And I can understand your reason.

I think the school should be shielding you from the emails so you don’t see them - either letting you block this parent or, if they have been forwarding them, ceasing to do so.

Anyone who thinks it’s reasonable to email after every lesson to bully you into doing what they want shouldn’t be getting their way.

My partner works from home. One of his parents has recently had an organ transplant so we are exceptionally careful as a result of that and his sister in law is also going through chemo so again we have been very cautious in our socialising etc.

The irony of talking about “basic science class” then advising she uses hand-sanitiser and wipes down surfaces. Covid is an airborne virus. It effectively spreads like invisible smoke and is beaten by good ventilation and decent masks. While washing hands/sanitising regularly is good for a number of other health reasons, it will do extremely little to protect against Covid and other airborne viruses.

And medics are there for the patients but somehow they are still OK to wear hazmat suits if treating someone with Ebola or glover for invasive procedures if treating someone with Aids.
The child in question does not have hearing problems.

There for the children but not at the risk of her health or that of her unborn baby.

Of course she should wear a mask if that's the advice. If parents don't like it that's tough but not up to them to dictate.

Exactly @Carouselfish !!

Not to mention all the parents insisting that schools have no protections for teachers and children, then moaning when teachers are off sick 🙄

What about my own child? As I have stated prior I do not have any pupils with hearing loss or that rely on lip reading. Furthermore as standard all my instructions are posted on the board and on our online devices. I use countdown timers and hand gestures anyway to jndicate quiet.
The question was also not should I wear a mask but should I have to explain to this parent why i presently wish to wear one.

I think the school need to deal with the parent very firmly. This is bordering on harassment at a time when you are feeling very vulnerable. You are choosing to wear a mask for a medical condition as approved by your doctor. The parent does not need any details at all around this. They need to take it on trust from the school that in the short term you will be wearing a mask in all classroom situations end of story. If the child has a special need, then they need to be talking to the Senco, or wellbeing or whoever is relevant to address their own issue, not try and change your behaviour to meet their needs. If you belong to a union maybe they can support you in this. I hope the school has your back. Congratulations on your pregnancy!

Yes of course you should wear a mask, and under your circumstances I would be tempted to go sick until my inoculations were up to date, and you were further into your pregnancy, it must be so worrying.
And no no explanation needed other than you are currently vulnerable they don’t need to know why.

The lack of oxygen, increased CO2 you’ll be getting and increase in bacteria you’re breathing in wearing a damp, germ-ridden mask all day, is far more harmful for yourself and your growing baby than not wearing one.

If you’re wearing a basic blue one, they don’t stop anything - they were a propaganda tool of the government to create fear. You would need a properly fitted air filtration system to stop what you’re worrying about and that’ll defo scare the kiddos!

Ask any theatre surgeon why they wear surgical masks and it’s not to stop viral transmission - it’s to stop body fluid splashes from the patient to surgeon and surgeon to patient.

Do some research into the harms of wearing masks.
Open the classroom windows and try to stop feeling anxious - anxiety creates cortisol and that (long term) can be detrimental to your heart health.

@Beautiful3

no, her and her health trump her job.
this teenager doesn’t have an issue hearing op or read her expressions , op has clarified this.

To the OP: I wear a FFP mask pretty much everywhere in public, and I haven't had as much as a sniffle in 5 years. Don't be intimidated by what people say at your workplace. Currently the UK is desperate for teachers, who are leaving the profession in droves. Good luck to your school or the parents there finding a replacement for you if they don't agree with your health practices! They're only making any noise because you're willing to listen to them. Ignore them.

To other posters here: stop spreading misinformation about masks. They work! Read some studies, or literally anything else than the Daily Mail. Your animosity towards masks is a different topic and not scientifically grounded in fact.

Just wear the mask and protect yourself. Your superior will tell you if they deem the mask to be innapropriate.

I think you should be free to wear the mask, even though I believe it is a pointless exercise (with regard to what you are trying to achieve).

My last 2 years of school were during the pandemic. I have ADHD and find it hard enough to focus normally. I found my teachers wearing masks incredibly distracting - my ADHD means I struggle with processing information and rely on facial expressions, following lips etc and the mask is a barrier to that. You also really couldn’t hear properly what they were saying.