To be hating my family holiday

[Wineplz90]

Currently away on holiday with DC 7 and Partner.
Absolutely sick and can't wait to return in three days time.
Hotel with slide and pool etc, been on trips and generally tried to do stuff they will enjoy.
All we've had is moaning and not an ounce of peace even for 5 minutes.
Won't even sleep in their own bed which is literally in touching distance from ours.
Partner has been great and we've tried to take turns doing stuff but it's still been really really hard work.
Is this very ones experience 🙄🙄🙄 I'm just disappointed I guess

I think its the experience of many to have a very unrealistic idea of how a holiday will be. Better to change your format than continue with the same type of holiday giving you the same type of results

Our 10yo gets as much attention as he wants on holiday. It’s only this year that we’ve found DH and I aren’t “enough” for him
on a beach holiday. He was happier the second week of our holiday when friends with DC joined us.

Gettingbysomehow
I find kids tend to hate holidays unless they are Disney land or something like that. Beach holidays or city breaks just bore them.

Disney ‘holiday of a lifetime’ was our ultimate nightmare holiday- the heat, queues, arguing because some are tired some ready to go on more and more, and in your head all there is is that little voice (sorry no that was dh) saying how we’ll never get here again and we’ve spent the holiday budget for the next century so have to do everything! And the cost!!!! Worst still is getting home and the look you get when you say you went and the worse one if you mention it wasn’t anything other than your dream holiday. Plus you have to gush about how lucky you are and privledged and not say that you would have had a better time in the hostel around the corner from your sister!!!

my kids have always loved every holiday we have had. They still do even though they are now at university. We are all pretty easily pleased and just love a change of scene. If there is sunshine and swimming, all the better!

OP, what in particular has bothered your son? Is he able to articulate it? What is he like at home? Was he excited about the holiday beforehand?

We've been on a beach holiday recently and it was mostly ok but I was ready for home by the end. We didn't do any excursions as it was expensive and eldest kid claimed to 'hate boats.' I just felt it would have been more stress than it was worth.

Most days looked like this: breakfast, back to room to get ready, walk to somewhere (beach/park/shops), lunch out, back to room for a quick break, pool until about 5, back to room for showers and chill before evening meal and entertainment. Kids seemed to enjoy it but it got pretty boring after a week.

Visited a lovely flea market one day but dc all complained it was too hot and too full of people and wanted to buy everything.

Very little time to sit and chill. Always wanted us in the pool playing with them.

But on the plus side they all ate well and slept better than they do at home.

It was a lot of money for a pretty average time but I guess that's what holidaying with kids is like.

I'm not even on holiday, just a day out today which has been cut short by children's constant bickering and general bastardness!

Ended up leaving early and bringing them home without going out for lunch as planned.

So now theres going to be absolutely no more days out for the rest of the holidays, I'm done!

I've just booked them both in to holiday clubs for the rest of the holidays!

You need a holiday to recover from a holiday with kids.

As an only child, yes, I remember holidays at that age being really boring, sorry. My parents thought I could just play in the sand and go on the slide 24/7 but realistically at that age I needed a lot more stuff to do and a lot more interaction.

I think you’ll find the vast majority of the tourism industry is predicated on the fact that kids love the beach!

Mine have been unexpectedly awesome today. A catastrophic navigational error turned a nice walk into a 15km one - oh my days the moaning.. BUT... we had to get back, they knew it and had they've slept/eaten well. Last night I was really miserable when we came back to the hotel at 9:30pm, but we'd travelled that day and my youngest was going to melt down.

After the walk today we've gone the pool to play (yes it then obviously rained!) and just had a giant nap; everyone is ready to eat and go out tonight. I think there's something about managing expectations and trying to ride things a bit. I aim for bumbling along most of the time and generally ignore minor wingeing. Good luck

Dont't think this is true. My boys have have have always loved a beach holiday.

Our holidays with our boys were the happiest days of our lives...

• Portugal - exploring the Argave, exploring local markets and eating lots of fish
• walking in the Swiss Alps
• Outer Banks of North Carolina
• Gettysburg, Amish County, NYC and Boston
• Disneyland and San Diego
• Rafting in the Sierras of California and Nevada

And so much more.

Really - my kids would hate Disneyland and loves a beach/pool/ exploring city break.

OP is this normal? Do you recognise any signs of separation anxiety or anxiety when you're at home?

I think also when you're 9n holiday it's easy to fall into the trap of not having firm boundaries because you want it to be special etc. But if you have a child who wants a mile when given an inch (👀 at my ds!) it often backfires.

This makes no sense!

1. Why did you test?
2. Why couldn't you stay on holiday? If you feel a bit below par, it's the perfect place to relax.

Depends on the child. My kids don’t give a monkeys about any Disney characters, don’t like theme park rides, hate crowds or queues and do not cope with heat or relentless sun. Disney is probably their worst nightmare - it’s massively overhyped and overpriced and I know people who spent a lot of money on “once in a lifetime” trips there who had a miserable time.

DD found taking lone child on holiday was hard work, they seemed to need constant entertainment. They used to invite a friend along and it got much easier.

Not normal for a child to behave like that on a holiday - check if there is an underlying problems with attention deficit or suchlike.

So we have been on trips , sat and played in the pool ,gone to markets and for dinner etc.
There's no kids club and unfortunately no other English children so a struggle
Been to Disneyland,caravan holidays,camping etc response is the same.

Agree with this. Not my experience at all either re kids only wanting Disney.

Taking an only child on holiday of that age is always going to be really really difficult OP. I would try and go with friends/family next time or somewhere with kids clubs

Language not necessarily a barrier at that age - play doesn't require detailed conversations or heartfelt chats. I remember an entire camping trip where I made friends with a dutch girl when I was around 7. Neither of us spoke a word of the other's language, but we developed a very detailed set of miming actions to communicate all the important factors needed for playing as a 7yo - swimming, roundabout, swings, slide, colouring in, food, thumbs up/down etc. Her family also taught me about the joys of buttered bread with chocolate sprinkles on. I still remember playing with her in the playground at the campsite for hours!

Hate to tell you this OP but 7yo is meant to be the start of the dreamy stage when your child is less needy and still relatively sweet / endearing before they turn into an arsehole teen/tween. And only one child means you don’t have to manage the tedious sibling bickering. So enjoy it!

Disclaimer: my kids are frequently annoying arseholes despite being in this dream age 🙄

Are they like this usually when you're at home?

Sounds like they’re finding it tough. Are they usually routine based or finds new situations overwhelming? My DD loves trips but we keep them short and sweet nowadays, we’ve learnt from experience that anything longer than 6 days she starts to really struggle and holidays become less fun. We’ve done a couple of long weekends which are perfect for us and take each day as it comes rather than a fixed structure

My dd9 is the same, but she’s nd and probably pda so I can at least explain the reason behind it. Doesn’t make it less frustrating though. We are on the second week of our Caribbean holiday and there’s been moans, cries, strops. Although it has got easier a bit on the second week as the adjustment to the heat/sand/change in routine has settled a bit. We have to leave in five days and have to adjust to our home routine again though. Oh fun..