To think this forum is over run with MRAs?

[Nadeed]

MRAs are men's rights activists. I can't believe the comments I am increasingly reading. So apparently:

• mums at home with 2 small children have an easy time and are just swanning around at the park or taking it easy.
• if a dad is verbally abusive to her and their children then his wife should understand the stress he is under
• being a SAHD is incredibly hard work and very demanding, but being a SAHM is piss easy and the mother should be grateful the father works so she can do this.
• kids have got short term memories so it does not matter if when a couple divorces the father hardly sees the kids.
• clear abuse from a husband to his wife is not really abuse, he is just stressed and she should be more understanding.

FFS its like the 1950's in here. About half the comments on this forum seem to be like the ones I have quoted, and half are sensible ones that recognise abuse is not okay, being a stay at home parent is hard work, and women should not put up with terrible partners just because they are stressed,

Yes because it's never been known for two women to disagree. So If someone disagrees with a woman, they're 100% a man and an mra 🙄

Oh I agree with you.

Some of the comments are just so OTT anti women and also so dismissive of the OP and their worries and concerns I just feel they are made to wind people up.

I’ve noticed this too.

@araiwa women can be MRAs as well.

Makes you wonder if mumsnet is being targeted.

@Worriedmummy2400 yes indeed.

It seems to be two extremes, the scenario you describe and the feminists that hate men just for existing.
Somewhere in between are most women just getting on with their lives and not shouting loud enough to block out the former.

I use mn far too much and I don't think it's quite that bad to be honest. Yes some of them are (the ones child maintenance piss me off the most) and on some the bar for men is incredibly low but there are plenty of vociferous supporters of women on here too.

There is something odd about that 'ironing' thread. I had the same thought as the OP.

There are definitely MRAs but none of the things you've suggested sound anything like MRA comments. They're just differences of opinion from yours. And in most cases you're being really disingenuous and paraphrasing what people actually meant. For example, nobody I saw on the thread about ironing really suggested that being a SAHM isn't hard work. They just said that they didn't think it was unreasonable, if someone is a SAHM, to do the family's ironing as part of her work as a SAHM that they do while their partner's doing his job outside the home to bring in a wage. Absolutely fine to disagree with that, but it doesn't make someone an MRA and it isn't an attitude from the 1950s.

kids have got short term memories so it does not matter if when a couple divorces the father hardly sees the kids.

This is the absolute opposite of an MRA attitude. MRAs are all about the 'She's turned the weans against me', Fathers 4 Justice stuff, and insist that fathers should see their kids constantly even after they've beat the shit out of the mother in front of them for the last 10 years.

On what planet would one of the few majority female sites not be a target for MRAs?

I wouldn't say we're overrun, and their pathetic posts are usually robustly challenged IME. If you see people trolling and shitstirring then report to them.

100%
You're not wrong OP

I wouldn't say it's overrun, but more that there are definitely a few, who pop up on threads. I suspect much of it is the same handful of men spending way too much time here.

Some of the replies on that thread are straight out of the 1950s.It felt like the thread was set up for MRA's. Or MN is being targeted by another forum.

@TulipCat yes it might be the same small number of posters name changing. No way to know.

kids have got short term memories so it does not matter if when a couple divorces the father hardly sees the kids

This is the opposite of the MRA position surely. I would think a man wanting more than 50/50 would be a MRA. Or wanting overnight access if abusive or if the child is very young. The position above is an extreme feminist viewpoint to me - effectively dads don't matter.

@KreedKafer crosspost sorry

The views being expressed are - if dad wants to see the kids lots then dads matter. If dad does not want to see the kids a lot, then the kids will be fine.
Basically it is supporting whatever suits dad and not the kids.

I probably mention stress a lot. I think it’s worth considering the impact outside stress puts on a relationship. I have been in abusive relationships where the answer was to pack up and leave, and I have been in normal relationships that have suffered under immense stress and then improved.
If there are kids involved it might be useful for people to explore all these avenues before throwing in the towel.

Not something I’ve seen. Women disagree about many issues. Maybe consider that

There were some comments on that ironing thread about looking after three pre school kids being a doddle and not difficult to do everything else as well, comments about her being "kept" and not contributing. They have been roundly and numerously challenged.

Well of course.
Some women are 'surrendered wives', for instance. 🤷‍♀️

I was reading another thread yesterday about MN changing the rules so that now a poster can't post on the same thread under more than one user name.

I didn't know you could do that - I use multiple names and it used to automatically put my user name as the one I first posted on the thread with. I didn't realise you could actually manually change it to another user name .

I'm glad they have stopped this and to me it explains why on some threads it appeared as though a really weird agenda was being promoted by various posters. Now I know it was probably the same poster using various names.

Yes, I thought that about the ironing thread.

That's not what she said though.