To think most online adult ADHD diagnoses are bullshit?

[OptimismvsRealism]

(I have ADHD btw.)

I know it can manifest in different ways but all these neat ladies organising multiple events a day and keeping a perfect home do not have it. They just paid £600 to Adhd-4-u and (to everyone's suprise !) came out with a diagnosis.

I don't think anyone these days can accept that life is hard and they just have a mediocre intellect.

I never tell anyone about my diagnosis now because it's embarrassing to be lumped in with the buy your own amphetamine prescription brigade.

I think the market should be regulated as there are a lot of unscrupulous practitioners out there.

Also referrals for mental health conditions such as depression, bipolar etc did not go up 268% after lockdown. Why aren't there people paying thousands to hear that they've got emotional intensity? Or making memes about it on Tiktok? There certainly are influencers who speak about this, but people don't relate to these things in the way they do a woman who says 'I forgot a relatives birthday whoops! That's ADHD for you!'

@voiceofastar because in none of the conditions you have listed are the people being assessed so invested in receiving a diagnosis. If my daughter doesn't receive a diagnosis for ADHD, I will not be going to another psychiatrist or disbelieving what they say, like so many do with ADHD. It's bizarre that if someone is diagnosed then obviously that psychiatrist is accurate and trustworthy but if they don't diagnose then they're obviously 'bad at understanding masking or presentations in women' etc.
On that note, all human beings mask, it's literally a survival adaption due to us being social creatures.

Stimulants do improve everyone's performance.

No they don't. The latest research shows that if you don't have ADHD, they make your performance WORSE.

@LameBorzoi Actually just been googling, They increase focus and concentration, but there is no evidence they improve performance in test scores for those with ADHD or without.

@Nadeed but they wouldn't necessarily increase test scores for people with ADHD either, they just might focus the mind on what the question is asking.
Most people would benefit from stimulants. Hence why they have such a street value.

Given this is definitely a spectrum disorder then I don't understand why the drugs would not work for everyone to some degree. And they do have a street value and always have done even before ADHD was widely recognised so presumably they must have an effect that people like. I have occasion to talk to quite a lot of people who abuse stimulants and many of them say that they like the effect on focus and take them eg to be able to stay up all night gaming.

At the very least the drugs will cause weight loss which would be enough for many people to want them. Cheaper than Mountjaro.

To be honest, and as a devil's advocate, the hordes of MumsNetters jumping into the thread to tell their own stories about how they are brilliant and academic, but now they understand why they couldn't cope with life after their ADHD diagnosis, and the ones complaining that some drs won't "diagnose my DC" are not doing themselves any favours.

I have thought for a while and, of all my friends with children (which are many) I can't think of a single one who doesn't have at least one child with a diagnosis of ADHD, ASD, dyslexia, dyspraxia, anxiety, depression, or who is not identifying as transgender or pansexual.I know they are completely independent conditions and situations all of them, but it all keeps you wondering whether we are all just desperate to have a label that explains why it's just simply so hard to cope with modern life, or accept oneself the way they are.

Some days ago there was a thread asking how many people felt like they "had their shit together". In a thread of many, many pages there were only 2 posters (one of them myself) who said we felt we had our shit together and were coping with life. Everyone else felt "panicked, barely coping, on the outside I look like my life is perfect, but inside I am falling apart".

When I was a teenager I couldn't make friends. I didn't understand social rules. I had tics. I had special interests. I was brilliant academically. I can't recognise faces. I can't orientate myself (often I get into a shop and don't remember which way I came in when i come out). I have echolalia. I had to train hard to be able to look people in the eye (I often don't, just look right below it). I am sure if I sought a diagnosis I would come up as ASD, and some people have also told me I would probably be ADHD too. But you know what? I actually think I am a person who had some difficulties, as others had other difficulties, and have managed to achieve a state of certain success in life. Would I have been happier and felt more "on top of things" with a diagnosis, and therapy, and medication? To be honest, I seriously doubt it, as I have multiple examples around me of people of all ages who were diagnosed at different points in time, and despite how much better they say they are, in practice they are still not coping with life and are having pretty much the same issues they had before the diagnosis.

I am sure people in the extremes of the conditions benefit from intervention. But most people with certain traits? I personally think they'd do much better accepting that everyone struggles with certain parts of being a human, and that modern life makes being a human harder.

90% of the population cannot simply have a "condition" that makes them "so different from everyone else". In fact, it looks like having a developmental condition is now the norm. How much of this is simply that the lives we live in this current, crazy world simply make it hard to be a fully-functioning human and feel a success?

I have no answers, but geting offended and attacking the OP makes it impossible to debate this. I cannot be the only one who has seen these conditions become the norm in almost every family.

There's a newish Cambridge/Melbourne study that shows worsening function with stimulants for non ADHDers.

There's a lot of evidence that stimulants are very very helpful for those with ADHD

Funny bar my children I know very few people who have children with autism.

Your stats don’t add up. Percentage with autism in uk is 1% and percentage with autism is 4%.

https://www.webmd.com/add-adhd/adhd-meds-stop-working

They don’t work for everybody.

Where is your evidence and stats for that? Diagnosis costs ££££ .Yiu can barely get 1 diagnosis on the NHS the wait is long.

Rejection disorder can be catastrophic. It causes suicidal idealisation in my daughter.

I must live within an anomaly then, I know at least 7 families in my closest circle (workmates and friends) with at least one child diagnosed with ASD. And the profession I currently work in (midwifery) is not known for attracting more people wuth autism (as opposed to my previous profession as a research scientist, where being in the spectrum was almost a given).

Yep you must be, given the actual stats and not the made up ones and also the huge amount of exaggerated inflammatory bullshit this subject causes.

I have ADHD (not diagnosed online) and I think it’s pretty gross how people jealously cling to their diagnosis and say anyone who isn’t like them is misdiagnosed/faking/attention seeking. We aren’t all the same, I might be totally different to you, does that mean my diagnosis is bullshit too? Is everyone’s who isn’t like you? It’s not a fashion, it’s not cool to be like, the only one with real ADHD and to call everyone else a fake!

I think it's because we've collectively decided that it's not ok for people have certain traits. That if you don't have a condition, then you are not allowed to be forgiven for errors. If you don't have a condition, you need to TRY HARDER.

Look at all the threads about people being late, for instance. You aren't allowed to be a bit scatty. If you are a bit late, that's selfishness, and the friendship is cut off.

You seem to have a wonderful understanding of who you are, and don't feel the need to justify it to anyone - I think that's great. However, I think a lot of people end up needing a diagnosis to justify themselves to others, so they are allowed to be themselves.

This is really insulting. I have ADHD, I also have my ‘shit together’, and a diagnosis helped me to get myself together and do the best I can in various ways by allowing me to understand myself and be gentle with myself.

As for what you’ve said about everyone having something - I am a teacher, so know countless children. I have two children with lots of friends. I personally only know 1 autistic child, and know OF one autistic child.l (don’t know personally but a friend’s sisters child). I know none with anything else you’ve ever mentioned. I only know one adult who have recently been diagnosed with ADHD and autism. That’s it. And I know a LOT of people. So I think you’re grossly exaggerating.

Also, listing your issues and then saying that you’d probably get an ADHD diagnosis is very odd. It’s very cruel and smug and like you’re bragging that you’re better than everyone else because you didn’t need to seek help or get a diagnosis? Lots of people go undiagnosed and manage to do life, others choose to seek help. Neither one is better than the other, it’s an odd thing to be competitive about. We are all different and need different levels of support.

That's a remarkable amount of projection in just one post.

I think LameBorzoi had a really interesting point that this society that is supposed to be very tolerant in fact requires you to have a diagnosis of something to access that tolerance and sympathy. Just being a bit eccentric doesn't cut it any longer which I think it did when I was younger.

The commonest reason I hear for people wanting an ND diagnosis (especially autism which is not treatable) is to understand themselves/ others to understand them which I think is a bit sad that we can't accept other's differences without a diagnosis. Also what about all the people whose cognitive challenges don't have a commonly accepted cause?

I do always feel shit when I see threads about how being late is a moral failing and disrespectful. I do kinda think that myself and am ashamed of it but I am still usually late. I am apologetic about it and I never think it's OK I just never manage to be there on time whatever I do because I always get distracted by one more task that I think I can fit in before leaving. Still I don't think that if I had an ADHD diagnosis I or anyone else would feel better about my lateness.

I think @aurynne is spot on.

I do think it's understandable that, in a society that rewards having an "identity", everyone wants one. And ADHD is relatively safe.

I don’t agree with that at all. I have a diagnosis (50s) so do my children. Society was far less understanding when I was a child . None of us give a shit about others understanding our adhd. In fact we’re embarrassed about it. I tell very few. It has been invaluable for understanding myself and helping me to try to improve though. NHS professionals felt a diagnosis would be hugely beneficial in treating and helping my dc.

Also part of the NHS group therapy support I’ve had is to tell or not to tell.Lots of people struggle with telling due to shame.