To think you ought to tidy to a reasonable basic standard before people come to view your house?

[LeapingUpstream]

Trying to settle a debate with DH. I'm not talking about making it look show-home perfect, I'm talking about making it look like a reasonably tidy and welcoming, albeit lived-in home.

YANBU: A basic level of cleanliness/ tidiness is both expected and kind of important to actually selling the place.

YABU: No, it's fine to let people look round whatever state it's in, even if the master bedroom floor is mostly invisible. (And therefore leaving it in said state for your heavily pregnant and not-very-well wife who can't currently bend over to deal with, having done nothing about it all weekend, despite saying you would, is totally acceptable. And she's being the unreasonable one for thinking it ought to be tidy and for being stressed and upset that it isn't.)

😡

I once viewed a property where the owner had left their crusty knickers on the bedroom floor. I didn’t even bother giving the EA feedback, it was disgusting.
Your DH is so out of touch! Sounds like he needs a wake up call in more ways than one.

Sweet lord i couldn't deal with this - Have sold a few homes and my god when we had viewing we made sure it was so so tidy. I never forget we got a call one time that someone was coming i had left that morning for overseas trip, himself raced home anything that didn't belong in the room was shoved in the press or anywhere they couldn't see, There was stuff shoved everywhere after that i bought plastic boxes that i could shove everything in and put in the van and the car. Also made a conscious effort hoover and wash floors nearly everyday to keep place clean- selling your house is a huge thing and you need to ensure that its ready to sell in order to sell quickly and no issues

That level of mess isn’t acceptable whether you’re selling a house or not.

You live in the house/bedroom too and it’s just respectful to clear up after yourself.

Get the Estate Agent to tell him.

Also to add

with a viewing especially if I saw a certain level of untidiness or dirt it would make me think about how they lived in general what else they did to the house.

id be thinking there were hidden things due to lack of care because if that’s what they let complete strangers see what else don’t they care about

Lazy arse, of course it should be tidy. Not show home level but being unable to see the bedroom carpet is bad!

Even if it wasn't up for sale, that would wind me up.

YANBU.

I would let the children pick 3 songs each on Spotify and make a tidy up playlist, alternating tracks. Then get an empty hold-all or suitcase, put it on the bed, and sit next to it. Whilst their song is playing, they have to tidy up things off the floor onto the bed. Anything that’s his, you put in the suitcase. Anything else you can fold neatly and make a pile for each person. When their song finishes, the next child tags in. When the playlist is over, stop and give them time to do their own thing. If they want to keep going during a sibling’s track, they can have 50p/extra 10 minutes on screens/whatever bribe you normally do. When it’s done, zip the case up, tidy to the side of the room, and leave it for him to sort through when he runs out of clothes.

Oh God, i viewed a house in this sort of state too :/ On paper it was ideal for us but was obviously going to need a proper deep clean so we left it.

If your house is cluttered/untidy viewers are going to be thinking 'if this is what the surface is like, what's going on underneath?' ie are you also careless about maintenance and repairs, and it'll be hard for them to get a good sense of how big rooms are - yes the measurements will be on the details but many of us 'see' much better in the flesh. So you're right, It's to your advantage for the house to seem as spacious and well kept as possible.
I moved last year and had a proper belt & braces clean, clear and tidy before we went on the market, and was strict with dcs about keeping on top of it after that. We had an offer within a month.

Is your DH not bothered about moving?

I've sold / bought 3 houses and it's absolutely not acceptable (or helpful to sell) for it to be anything other than immaculate. sorry.

When I was looking two years ago I came to the conclusion that lots of people don't tidy or do basic levels of maintenance and must keep moving to avoid it!

I basic level of tidy/cleanliness is definitely required.

It partly depends what price you want for the house.
We are currently selling and we want as close to the asking price as possible so we are making the house look as good as it can look. That includes the built in cupboard being tidy and half empty (to show the abundance of storage available- so much we don’t even need it all 😂😂)
However we are looking at ‘no onward chain’ doer uppers. I fully accept they might be awful, and often look at the ceiling for a real idea of room size. But I won’t be offering asking price for them (unless they are really ‘priced to sell’.
I am continually surprised when I see the marketing photos on Rightmove of houses where people are living and they are messy; with baskets of washing on the sofa etc. You knew they were coming!! You booked them and you want to sell the house! Move the washing!
A bedroom floor covered in crap would put me off. Maybe not from offering but certainly from giving a top offer unless there were overwhelming positives.

It kind of depends.

I'm not sure as a societal norm/expectation, but if you're selling your own house, then it's clearly in your interests to have it tidy and uncluttered. You're essentially selling a lifestyle in many cases, and people aren't going to buy it if all they can visualise 5 years and 2 kids down the line is mess and clutter everywhere and having to move again for more space. The message you want to give is "This house works for a family, who can live neatly and tidily here and have time for hobbies and self-fulfilment and feelings of zen" (even if that's complete bullshit!). No one is going to buy a house that stresses them out.

If it's a landlord's property and they're selling/ letting to new tenants, I'd probably make sure no dirty dishes in the sink or knickers on the bedroom floor but that's about it.

Think I'd cancel the viewing and if husband is happy to show house without tidying, he can book the viewings when he's there to do them and you can go out.

If he’s this lazy about trying to sell the house it doesn’t bode well for having a newborn baby. Is this his first child?

I feel like there's more going on here. Is he usually helpful around the house? Does he take his share of the load?

I don't think the house sale is the issue here.
The issue is either the fact that you have different standards or that he sees it as your job

I would clear the floor - anything of yours your need to claim and then get DC to do it - they will feel gleeful about putting DH's precious stuff in a bin bag, and then put it outside. Maybe in the garage or shed if I was feeling generous. But only if they are giant spiders, maybe a wasp nest. Pity rain is not due otherwise it would be out out. He is taking the piss at the least and potentially enjoying the stress he has caused at the worst because he has pissed off and left it all to you. But he has left it all to you so bin it. Or maybe tell him you binned it when it is safe in the shed to teach him to clear up before a viewing. Two strikes and you're out - next time it is really gone to recycling

Shouldn't have to play these games.

I'm going to go against the grain here, a bit. We bought our current home from a couple who had toddler twins and the woman was pregnant. There was mess and toys everywhere. Clothes hanging from the bannisters, stuff all over every surface.
We bought it because we could tell it was a good house, in an excellent area, for a fair price. It was a great decision.
Plus - when they moved out it looked spacious!

Yes, I think that's the problem.

If I viewed a messy house, I would assume either as PP suggested, that the vendors might have neglected maintenance of the property, or alternatively that they didn't really want to sell, and therefore were likely to be obstructive further down the line.

I would have to REALLY love the property to make an offer, and even if I did, it would most likely be a low one.

I went to view a flat and the guy didn't even get out of bed!

That's brilliant! Did you just walk round him to look at the room

I would not buy a messy house unless it was at a knock down price for the location and I had plans to do it up.

Sorry but I don't want to see people's lives around me. The state it is in indicates the owners do not take care and query what other things could be lurking.

All the houses I have seen are immaculate in their listings and on visits. Then again, those owners were aiming for a good price.

I’m house hunting at the moment and messy house pictures immediately put me off. If they can’t be bothered to clean I can’t imagine they’ve been bothered to keep the house maintained.

Normal life clutter doesn’t worry me, but I’ve seen some shocking pictures.