To think this is not acceptable behaviour from a dad to his 8 year old son...?

[planAplanB]

• Shouting at child in anger
• Tapping child's bottom with his hand
• Grabbing child's wrists to get him off the sofa and move him towards the door
• Calling child stupid
• Claiming his mothers parenting 'lets him get away with bad behaviour'
• Chasing child in anger around island in the kitchen shouting for him to go to his room.

I know that the above behaviour is not acceptable from an adult to their child but can anyone else tell me if their husband also does this?

It was horrible to witness. I intervened to remove husbands hands from child's wrists. Older child also witnessed this.

So did your son hit and shout at dh?

I'm not sure whether it would be classed as abuse, but quite clearly, the father is unable to assert himself effectively without the need for shouting and chasing the kid around. He sounds pathetic.

Yes my 8 year old shouted at DH to give the remote back. Apparently he hit his father too. DS has now apologised for hitting my husband. STBEXH has reluctantly apologised to my son for his aggressive actions. I forced the conversation as my husband was not having any of it, claiming his behaviour was reasonable. I basically said that daddy shouldn't have lost control of his temper and grabbed/chased you and he's sorry, for which husband then agreed he was sorry. He's a fucking man-child.

I'm not turning a blind eye to this.

I've told my RL friend so someone else knows and I can't be gaslighted if I bring this up in the future.

Just so simplistic

No, my children never had this type of treatment from their father.
My second husband was a drunk but never treated his children like this while they stayed with us.
My sons in law would never do any of these things. They’re no push over and expect their children to behave but I can’t imagine either of them doing any of this.

Your husband is taking his anger ( over the divorce ? Your living situation? Something else?) out on a child. So wrong and will do so much harm to both your children.
Can only suggest you speak to Women’s Aid, your solicitor maybe.

I'm pretty sure none of this counts as assault unfortunately.
If you don't want him having access to them then after splitting you could talk to Social Services.

Your household sounds utterly chaotic.
Why are the parents and the children hitting each other, and shouting?
Parental communication skills sound shocking.

To the above poster - it's just ONE parent behaving like this. I'm not.

@Missamyp because noone teaches you how to be a parent except your own experience and OP has already said this was her experience as a child and she is trying to break that cycle but it's made harder when you have no real life comparisons

You haven't answered why your son is arguing over a remote so much that he feels it's ok to strike a parent and then refuse to go to his room.

This is what I mean by chaotic.

His father shouted when DS took the remote back and then child shouted in response. I didn't see when DS hit husband. Maybe when husband was trying to get remote back again? Such an over reaction. I don't really think that's the point. The problem is the way the adult dealt with the issue.

Calling a dc stupid is extremely abusive and will have long lasting effects on DC self esteem.

The only time my DH ever grabbed a child arm was when DC aged 8 saw a dog across the road he knew and went to run out to fuss it but there was a bus coming. He also apologised to DC but told him he thought he'd be run over.

My husband simply can't see any of his behaviour as a problem.