Would you expect to be invited?

[Tinogirl]

DH’s female cousin is home at the moment having lived abroad for a decade.

They have gone out to dinner and I’m not invited. I’m really shocked.

Would you be or am I being stupid?

He says he knew I would be annoyed but he thinks it will be good for his daughter to meet her cousins.
They aren't his DD's cousins though, are they? What would it be...second cousin? Cousin once removed?
Sounds like she doesn't want to see your DH as a part of a happy family for whatever reason.
A meal out was fair enough if she was treating him, but a family get-together? I hope he refuses unless you are included.

She doesn't view you as family and he's fine with that.

That's a big deal imo.

' his daughter '

yes ?

so the cousin is doing it slowly bit by bit
makes perfect sense

and I guess she will meet you before she meets your daughter

He will be going with his daughter, my stepdaughter to stay in a house owned by her parents-in-law.

I would say that they are her cousins as well and her dad would most definitely insist that they were but cousin’s own children will be there as well although slightly older and different sex.

DH says he can’t ask for two other people to be invited.

DH said he will invite us all to an Airbnb in a place that was special to their grandparents when they’re settled back in the UK.

I know people disagree but I can’t help feeling left out.

don't make this all about you
it's not
it's all about his cousin being away for a long time

of course he cannot invite 2 extra people

cousin is seeing direct blood family first
and it made perfect sense to see dh first then his child

I think and DH has conceded that she is probably not terribly interested in cousins’ spouses and when prompted by me he admitted showed no interest in me or my daughter.

He will never turn down an invitation for his daughter anywhere that involved his family no matter what. He has said this.
Fair enough!

does she have time to be interested in spouses ? people she hasn't met/doesn't know
how long is she on holiday for

Well, have you entered DH's head? I mean if I were him I'd say "OK if I bring X, she would love to meet you". I think it is weird to exclude you because you are not a fling or a date, your couple is established. I would never invite a family member without partner, it's not polite. So I'm with you on this one OP.