Going away (almost) every school holiday?

[Reddingmilk]

We went abroad at Easter so we aren’t going away this month. Lots of school Mums being surprised that we aren’t going away again.

I am surprised people can afford to go on holiday so much as well as have enough annual leave for it?!

Quite a few families from school have been away at Easter, May, then they’re having a UK break this summer as well as going abroad. Then they’ll be off somewhere again in October. Baffles me.

In between this, they have lots of days out at the weekend.

I’m not just talking about foreign holidays, even the UK isn’t cheap and then using up annual leave too.

Am I doing something wrong? We are cautious with money and need to plan annual leave carefully so have some spare in case of illness etc. It seems to be unusual these days to spend time at home or just doing low key stuff locally.

This is the absolute dream for me. I am a single parent so that makes things difficult financially BUT the income I do have is as passive as possible specifically because I want to be able to travel as much as I can. I have family in southern Europe so can take the kids there every holiday but ideally I would be doing: Christmas alternating somewhere long-haul with family in Southern Europe, Feb half term - definitely somewhere hot and long-haul, Easter maybe in California, May half term in Europe, 6 weeks of summer travelling to 2-3 holiday destinations, October half term somewhere hot and on we go. At the moment I am just doing the Southern Europe options with the kids and then do manage a couple of work/adult only additional ones but Ideally I could afford to take all of us away every holiday. Travel makes some of us very happy.

Depending on where you are going/what you are doing going away (e.g. easyjet flight to grandma in Europe/caravan holiday in the UK) can work out cheaper than not taking AL and putting the DC in holiday club while you work especially if you have 2/3 DC.

I was stating that although we didn't go on more than one holiday a year we did not neglect DS. He didnt suffer because we made sure we spent money on him in other ways. I don't know how that is unpleasant.

My son went to a school in a very affluent area and I know fine well what other parents could afford. My DS was very intelligent and musically gifted and I'm not ashamed that we tried to encourage that. I wasn't commenting on whether other people did this or not. How was I offensive?

I actually find unpleasant posters coming on here saying we are affluent, we have lots of money. We have 4 holidays a year. That to me is boastful. Yet you are taking exception to me saying we only went on one holiday a year but spent money on things such as books and music lessons? I don't understand where you are coming from.

if that helps, we go to the library A LOT, if I buy books they are second hand
and the music lessons from a private provider at school are actually quite cheap.

You do what you want, but let's not pretend we go on holiday as often as possible instead of providing for our kids. We do other things cheaply.

People just have different levels of income, how is that surprising? We would go away more if we had more annual leave. We’re not jet setters by any means but we’re just constrained by 31 days AL plus 8 bank holidays a year each (Civil Service) 🤷‍♀️

We live in a fairly deprived area so many people book a term time holiday to save money. I start googling cheap/free things to doin the summer holidays in about may and we try and get out 3 times each week. Last time we had a holiday was 2013 and last time I went abroad was 2002. I did accompany dh on one of his work trips but the only thing I saw was the service stations and the holiday inn. Although I didn't have to buy the dc to bed, that was nice.

Are you sure it's just they aren't paying attention and forgot you went at Easter? More people have their one and only holiday in the summer not Easter.

It depends where they are going. We will have had 5 holidays this year. 1 wedding abroad, 2 trips to stay in my brothers air bnb abroad (so only need to pay for travel) 1 trip to Butlins mainly paid for by clubcard vouchers, 1 holiday for our 10th wedding anniversary. In total, we have probably spent less than 2k across 5 holidays, which some would spend on 1 holiday.

We both have long service with nhs so get 33 days AL plus bank holidays, so that helps with the leave

Good point. The base that people are comparing holiday costs against is different, and not everyone would spend the same thing staying at home. If you'd have to pay for multiple lots of childcare anyway, the difference between that and a holiday is less.

I think it's a case of different strokes for different folk!

Some people prioritise having the latest branded clothes, others it's cars, some it's spent on holidays.

We go on a few different trips but it's from mega cheap camping trips and staying with family to trips away. We are very good at the last minute deal and getting the most out of a trip though and usually it costs cheaper then a week in Scotland!

@Reddingmilk if it's not about the money, then surely you understand different people like different things? DH travelled A LOT before kids, and continue to do so. We do one UK trip a year but more than that I'd find boring. Also the weather in the UK is too unreliable, sorry for enjoying sunshine.

Nope, possibly the Roman empire though, and also whatever it was called when the Spanish invaded Italy in medieval times.

(My parents did those DNA ancestry tests for fun recently, they were mainly Italian but also a bit Spanish and Northern European)

People, their priorities, their finances, their energy levels, their interests are all hugely different. And their willingness to take on debt as well.
I honestly think holidays are so overrated, expensive, hassle etc etc but other people live for their holidays (my brother for example).
So yeah who cares what anyone else does. U do u 💞

Whoops - I responded to the completely wrong thread there (as you can probably tell). Had meant to respond to one about if my ancestors had been involved in the British empire.

We go away most school holidays but not always overseas and not always expensive. So might go away for a week in the summer and to stay with family another week. Then maybe a long weekend somewhere and a couple of days at the seaside. We're not super wealthy but do prioritise holidays over a lot of other things, eg get most clothes off Vinted, we're veggie so don't spend as much on food etc.

We went to Cornwall for 4 nights in the May half-term and have booked a late holiday to the Greek Island of Kos, for next week. I have a big birthday in the October half-term, so we may go away for a few days. We don't always go abroad. We've gone away in the UK for a few nights in both the May and October half-terms before. All families are different, and their finances/holiday allocations vary too. I work in a non-teaching role in a Primary school, so I'm off during the school holidays. My husband WFH and goes into the office and works full-time. He has flexi-time, so can build hours up, to have time off, on top of his usual holiday entitlement.

Everyone is different and some people can afford to go away more than others. I honestly think that children don’t care that much about going away all the time. When I was a child I hated flying and my parents brought me on loads of foreign holidays which filled me with anxiety sometimes. I know I am privileged but I honestly preferred just doing low key stuff locally a lot of the time. The best memories I have are from time spent playing with friends outdoors at home.

A week at Easter, may, summer and October only equals to 20 days. So assuming saving some for Christmas that’s plenty. I’m self employed but my partner has to use holidays. He has to use 3-5 days at Christmas for office closure. And still manages fine enough. We don’t go away loads on hols but we visit family often. We camp locally at weekends a lot too which often feels like extra mini hols for cheap.

Pay less attention to others. They do their thing. Who cares what they think? Shrug and get on with your life!

The only thing you are doing wrong is taking notice of everyone elses doing. Do w hat you are comfortabke/happy with and stop worrying.

@Reddingmilk i am
genuinely baffled by this too.my neighbours go away every holiday and I keep asking them
how. What I have realised though is:

1. bank of grandparents seems to be funding holidays for more families than you might realise. When we were away at may half term I was really surprised by the large family groups.
2. people buy extra leave/ have generous allowances/ take unpaid parental leave
3. grandparents do childcare or there is a sahp so people don’t need to save leave for childcare
4. part time or compressed working means people aren’t using as much leave
5. people own their own business and can take whatever leave they want.

I feel like 25 days really isn’t enough leave- I’d like 35 plus bank holidays- i think and that would make me happy. 😃

Definitely, people aren't necessarily that limited by annual leave. As well as the things you mention, I know people who don't do the Mon to Fri 9 to 5 and can sometimes get themselves a longer bloc by shift or day swapping with colleagues. Or even if you do standard office hours but part time, if you normally do 3 days a week and you can do day swaps, flex etc to say work 5 days the week before, it all means the leave goes further.

Not everyone can do any of these things, but I bet if you add up all the families who fall into at least one of these categories it'd be the majority.

I’ve always prioritised travel. We used to go away every school holiday, but I planned carefully and we did it on a budget.

I am also baffled at this tbh

I wish I could go abroad every holiday. We went to Orlando and did the parks in May so I couldn’t justify a big Summer holiday, but I am off work this week on a staycation at home and I do feel a bit gutted that I am not somewhere more exciting. I know I am v lucky and am not complaining but I do see time off work as time to holiday away from home. It is what makes work bearable!