To think 'let me know if I can get any shopping for you' means give me the money you cheeky cow!

[Milkshakebreaks]

AIBU here? A neighbour responds to 'Can I get you anything from the shop?' With yes please, and you buy those items and deliver them

AIBU to say this means that neighbour will pay you back?

Since when did it mean you'd buy the items and not wanting reimbursement? 😡

Of course not. You hand the items over with the receipt and say, ‘here we go, it came to £23.50. Do you want my bank details or would you rather pay cash?’

What was said when the shopping was deposited?

Did you not tell them what it came to when you knocked? Did they just say, 'thanks love' and close the door or something? Any reason why can't knock now and ask?

For context, this offer was when the neighbour was going through a lot and recently home from the hospital.

One week later (when I saw her in Sainsbury's), I asked her about the money, I just said there's no rush but can I have the money for those bits?

She was shocked and said she thought it was a gift? I chuckled and made my excuses, said I had to go quickly for a pick up etc

Ask for the money!

Depending on the amount you spent maybe that was a reasonable assumption based on tge fact she'd been poorly?

I just said 'the receipt with the amount is in the bag. I'll leave you to it and hope you can get some rest soon' as she looked really sad and was on the phone still when I was at the door

She was shocked and said she thought it was a gift?

How long ago was this and how much was the shopping? Has she contacted you since to pay?

It's been about 10 days now. The amount total I can't remember exactly, about £10

Well, you did make the it sound like a gift saying it like that...

Just do an Elsa.

What part of saying that the receipt is in the bag made it sound like a gift???

I’d personally leave it at this point if it’s been ten days and you think it amounts to £10, but I understand that you’d feel annoyed to not have been paid back - consider this a loss and move on but obviously you know not to help in the future in case they react the same way

Even if it did sound like a gift (and I'm not convinced it did), the standard response for most would be, "Thanks, how much do I owe you?"

Only a cheeker fucker would assume it was free.

If she doesn’t pay, you can’t make her I guess-but yes, she is a CF!

She’s daft though as she has just lost the good will of a kind neighbour who might be really useful with getting any emergency bits and pieces in future.

I fully expected to pay when I was recovering from an operation and people offered to get things from the shop for me. I only asked for bits and bobs and was a bit out of it asking for random things. No one would take my money. She may have honestly thought it was a gift. But that being said don't ask for shopping expecting someone else to pay for it.

Even if she thought it was a gift when you asked her for the money she shouldn't have said out loud she thought it was a gift, that's CFer behaviour

They should pay you back... and if you had intended it as a gift, then they should at least offer to pay you back.

Nobody in the entire history of the universe thinks that asking a neighbour to get food from a supermarket doesn’t require reimbursement. She’s taking the piss and you’ve been had. Ask for the money and stop being a doormat.

You should be handing the receipt over with the shopping saying bank transfer or cash (whatever suits you)

@Brightredtulips she was one the phone, OP said the receipt is in the bag, clearly she expected reimbursement

Thank you. I was beginning to think there was an unwritten social rule that 'let me know if you need anything from the shops' actually meant it was free and the asker wasn't expected to pay the money back

You give receipt time when you drop the food off...covid time husband had covid and we isolated... friend did food shop and gave us receipt and PayPal address...on opening found she bought bottle of wine and chocolate s not on receipt. We paid receipt.in full by PayPal 1-2 hours after milk, bread, veg, fruit pasta etc be delivered and I messaged her re the chocolate and wine and she said don't be silly...still see said friend weekly and I've helped her and will be tomorrow and she helped me. Neighbour needs to pay

Of course she should pay and is cheeky af thinking it was a gift, but equally it’s a bit tight to begrudge £10 when the woman was recovering from surgery unless you’re very hard up. At least you know never to offer again.

Tbf if it was a one-off when she was ill I think she could reasonably have thought it was a gift. People take fruit baskets etc as gifts when people are unwell. How much was it?

I dint agree. The favour is you physically getting stuff for someone immobilised or who can’t get to the shop, the favour is not paying for the stuff. Mannners to always offer money, the person doing the favour then decides what they want to do about payment. I thought this was a neighbour, not a friend?

I didn’t know having an operation meant you didn’t spend your own money I’ll remember that if I ever have one, or that if you aren’t hard up you just give a tenners worth of stuff to people!