To think 'let me know if I can get any shopping for you' means give me the money you cheeky cow!

[Milkshakebreaks]

AIBU here? A neighbour responds to 'Can I get you anything from the shop?' With yes please, and you buy those items and deliver them

AIBU to say this means that neighbour will pay you back?

Since when did it mean you'd buy the items and not wanting reimbursement? 😡

Ive just seen it was 10 quid.

Id probably in the circumstances have said how much do I owe you but part of me would have wondered if it was a get well gift.

My friend bought me a big bag of oranges when I was unwell (admittedly unprompted) but it honestly didn’t cross my mind to pay her. I just thanked her for her thoughtfulness.

Of course it wouldn't cross your mind to pay her though? You didn't ask for those oranges, she just got them

Different if it was her weekly shop. But a tenner is just a few items and could well fall in gift territory.

Yeah I’m now wondering though! 🤣

TBH I have bought shopping for sick neighbour, under a tenner, she offered cash and I refused. She definitely should’ve offered payment.

If it’s something given to you unprompted then you can assume it’s a gift. If you’ve asked for those specific items you should expect to pay!

It was the bit of "I'll leave you to it..." Rather than something like "I'll pop round tomorrow for the cash" or whatever.

I think since she was sick she thought it was a present since it was cheap.

I bring my friends free food when they are sick and I offer to get them stuff.

The relevant question is - now she knows you did not intend a gift is she paying it back?

I would have offered you the money if I were in her shoes. However, if people have been dropping round a lot of gifts and being supportive — and she has been a bit preoccupied with recovering — I don’t actually think it’s that cheeky of her not to have thought of it.

I would have offered in her shoes, but also, I wouldn't have wanted the £10 if I'd done that as a one off for a sick neighbour. It's not really any different to taking a bunch of flowers or a box of chocs and I expect people have been dropping round gifts.

To be fair, if she was recently home from the hospital and it was around a tenner, I'd have just gifted it anyway

I said she should pay. Of course she should.
However from the outside I would also raise an eyebrow at someone who kept demanding reimbursement of £10 from a poorly woman. I wouldn’t want to know either of them.

It sounded like a gift, the way you’ve described it. It can’t have been much stuff if it only came to £10 so it could feasibly be a favour for a neighbour.

I would always ask for your bank details to pay you back, just in case. But I can see how the misunderstanding has happened

What if the OP can't afford it though??
I think that regardless of whether the neighbour was ill or not she should still have offered. The OP already did something nice by going to the shops.

She may not have heard you about the receipt as she was preoccupied and on the phone. As she's recovering from surgery and it's under £10, if you can afford it, I'd leave it. I wouldn't necessarily think she was a CF, either, just has a different attitude (she'd do the same for you, perhaps).

She was out shopping in Sainsbury’s one week later!

She'd been in hospital. It was under £10

I think YANBU to expect her to offer to pay, but YABU to chase her for payment

You've sacrificed good neighbourly relations for the sake of a modest sum of money. I doubt it was worth it

In her shoes I'd like to think I would have offered, although if others were giving gifts I may have interpreted it as a gift of practical nature.

Chasing a sick neighbour for a tenner would never occur to me in a million years though.

Unless it makes a real difference to your own budget OP I'm cringing hard on your behalf.

How old is the sick neighbour? If they are elderly I think offering to get a few bits from the shop, especially if they live alone and are vulnerable, would seem like you were helping them without expecting financial recompense.

If they are elderly and vulnerable I don’t think you should go around and offer them anything if you expect them to give you money.

If they are under retirement age and not vulnerable then UANBU as others have said.

I do think the neighbours circumstances make a difference.

Just stop offering

It's always complicated for the borrower

I lent SIL money the other week, guess who had to remind her to pay it back?

Moi

Never again

If they are elderly and vulnerable I don’t think you should go around and offer them anything if you expect them to give you money.

^

Pfft

What the hell is this??!

You've got some odd ideas about gift etiquette. I clearly needn't spend so much time in the future to scrape those price stickers off items I gift to somebody!

I would imagine many elderly or infirm people would be really grateful for anyone getting a few bits of shopping for them and would want to pay for it. I know my parents would and they would then be happier to ask again.

Just say how much it cost and that they can transfer the amount to you or give you cash when you bring the shopping round. No payment means no shopping.