To be so affected by the Southport news

[wonderingwandering99]

I can’t stop crying about this news story. I’ve recently had my first child and I don’t think it would have affected me quite so much before I became a mother. But I’ve felt sick ever since I found out yesterday.

I just can’t stop thinking about how many people’s lives will be forever ruined by this most hellish, heinous event. How will they ever be able to have normal lives? I’m so heartbroken.

It felt like a bad dream when I woke up this morning and remembered it was actually real and this has really happened. What a dark, dark day for our country.

Me too, I cuddled my DD extra tight and kissed her little cheek over and over at bedtime and must have told her I love her 50 times.

This really could happen to any of us at any time, it's so so horrific.

Heartbreaking, those poor children and their families. Can't stop thinking of them 😢💔

i also cried when I initially heard the news and then again when I saw the photos of the three little girls whose lives have been taken. I keep thinking of the other injured children too, what their families must be going through sitting in hospital, hoping they recover.

It’s so devastating, so beyond comprehension. I left my little boy at his summer holiday club today and I couldn’t imagine how a day full of sunshine and laughter with friends might turn into a life-changing tragedy. How can anyone make sense of it? I don’t think I could stand the grief.

My heart breaks for the children affected and their families. I will think of them for a long time.

I’ve been really affected by this too- I think most people are tbh. However you will have addition of hormones too.

I haven’t been on my phone today but it’s been in my thoughts. However when I got home I went onto Facebook and in my feed saw a post with the three girls pictures and names and the news a third child had died - the tears just came and I hugged my 12 year old (who tolerated it well considering she’s not much of a hugger these days).

I’ve also been thinking about the family of the 17 year old. He has parents too who were probably very unaware of this potential. He was a young child once and still at 17 is legally a child. I can’t even begin to comprehend where it all went wrong.

Oh, bless you. It is horrific, shocking to the core.

Callous as it sounds, try not to read any SM or watch the news. Have a break from it.

I was the same just after my 2nd was born in 2007 and an horrendous child cruelty case reached headlines. I can feel myself going there again.

Absolutely heartbreaking.

Can't stop thinking of all involved.

It's shocking, and the rioting that's happened following the vigil is terrible. What hope is there when a community can't even come together to grieve?

It’s utterly horrifying. I have a little girl the age of th youngest killed and she’d have been thrilled to go to a summer club based on Taylor Swift dance. It’s all she’d have talked about for days and I imagine all these young girls so excited for it and then for this utterly horrific thing to happen. Just so devastating.

All sorts makes you extra emotional when pregnant and new baby, esp with sleep deprivation.

When I was in hospital after having mine, I kept thinking about my own family (elderly dying), giving birth made me think about life and death for some reason. Not being in a hospital, I wasn't particularly ill, just the idea of birth and life and everything that goes with it.

Yes it's understandable for anyone to be affected and rightly so. I'm not taking away from anyone's feelings of horror about what's happened but I do think when you've got children and you're taking them out and about places, it adds an extra level of anxiety. We can do everything to keep them safe, but it's not entirely in our hands and the thought that a random stranger could do something like this is very worrying.

Look after yourself OP. I remember feeling things on a much more visceral level and being quite badly affected by certain events when my first was a newborn. It's a vulnerable time and I wouldn't wish that sick-in-the-gut feeling on anyone

Me too. My kids are all grown up but I’ve had to stop watching the news. I can’t bear thinking about those poor families.
So many people who will never recover from their loss or from what they witnessed.

Yes this was when my eldest was born too and the news around that case was extremely overwhelming then too. It led me into my career now tbh.

However this does feel different.

As the mum of a 17 year old this (and too many other violent stories) is heartbreaking.

It's really affected me too. I have a DD who's in the age range and loves Taylor Swift so if the activity had been near us I'd have booked her on. I can't image how the families and the poor children who were there are feeling. Heartbreaking.

I was on the beach there a last week, alone with my four year old 4, it could have been anyone, any time , anyplace. I think with op as a new mother it brings home our vulnerability. We females feel more vulnerable than ever. As a mother , you can imagine dropping your little one off , all excited , then this. Think this has been a massive shock to the country as a whole.

No. My feelings about this tragedy have a lot to do with being a mother because I can’t help but imagine my own child being caught up in such a tragedy. I didn’t have that frame of reference before. Not sure why you’re trying to explain my own feelings to me.

It's just awful, I cried watching the news this morning and when I heard the 3rd girl had died. So sad

It’s truly horrific. We have a team there and have sent our thoughts to them all, some are affected as they know people impacted, others just so upset that happened in their town. One lady in another office had to go home as she was very upset as again she knew someone impacted. But I think all parents are impacted knowing that not matter what precautions you take, you can’t always keep your children safe. My thoughts are with all those affected by this senseless tragedy

It's absolutely heartbreaking, I lost it when the Photos were released of the 3 girls

yesterday I was teaching a dance summer camp all day, and read the awful news when I got home. It was hard going into work again today, many of the children I am working with are similar ages to those children and I cannot imagine what they and their families are going through, not to mention those two brave dance teachers who tried so hard to protect them.

I get you OP. Postpartum is a really vulnerable time, the thought of anything happening to your tiny baby and wondering what kind of world you have brought them into. I remember seeing a meme that said something like one of the hardest things about motherhood is feeling like your heart is living outside your body and it sounds cheesy but it's true. You're just right not to let anyone undermine the seismic life change you've just been through.

To be fair to the OP, I doubt they are meaning to say that other people’s reasons for reacting are less valid. It is natural and human to identify strongly with tragedies and to do so from our own experience. The killing of children is bound to deeply affect parents, as parents, but so long as there is no implication that this frame of reference is more valid than any other, I think we should allow people to feel what they feel.

Its natural to feel upset and moved by such a tragedy.

OP- If you are finding its taking over your thoughts and you can't focus on your day to day life, I'd be speaking to your GP or health visitor about possibly post natal depression. x

It is very upsetting but please do keep it in perspective to protect your own mental health. The way our media works now mean tragedies are in our pockets, they are thankfully rare. Hug your little ones tight but try to remember rare events, sad but rare

It feels to me beyond any worst nightmare of any human being. I'm sure so many on Mumsnet will have never even heard of Southport, I honestly can't get my brain to compute that this has happened.

Schools have locked gates now because of the tragedy of Dunblane. DC's school Holiday Club has buzzer/CCTV entry. What I think scares parents, me included, is they have a child attending sports clubs or hobbies in community halls up and down the land where this could happen. It's just tragic and my heart goes out to everyone involved.