Was this a bit rude of my boss?

[rudebosspotentially]

I recently started a new job and have been really going the extra mile (staying up late to complete projects, being there for my boss at all hours). The work is pretty chaotic but I just took it in my stride and really hit the ground running, and have have some massive wins since I first started.

We recently had a big departmental awards thing and there was a people's choice award for "new rising star". My boss was leading the committee and had some influence over the final winners. She kept saying that people were nominating me and it could be me. I tried not to get my hopes up but I've been working so hard and working with so many stakeholders across the business, I had a feeling it could be me.

It ultimately went to a colleague on another team. That was fine.

But then my colleague posted about her award on LinkedIn.

And my boss commented "Nobody deserved that award more than you"

My heart just sunk. Is it just me or was my boss a bit insensitive?

This, exactly. There’s a difference between working hard and being a mug. Unless your contract specifies availability to your boss outside of working hours, knock that on the head, for a start. Also, don’t work for approval.

Tactless but it wasn't about you, don't take it personally.

You're making a rod for your own back btw and it isn't a sign of a good worker to have to be still going late at night regularly.

I know sometimes it's flat out but on the whole it doesn't look great to have to be doing extra hours on top of those you're paid for to stay on top of work.

I'd aim to pull this back while you're still relatively new and look at why you're having to work late regularly. What can be done differently with your time.

I would be pissed off but it probably wasn't said deliberately. Like you OP, I have gone over and above to keep things going, I truly wish I had realised sooner that I was making a mug of myself. No appreciation and some of the lazy sods that did the bare minimum were treated like the second coming of Christ
A hard lesson eventually learned

And my boss commented "Nobody deserved that award more than you"

I have heard this kind of phrase many times said to various people.

I think your boss said that to your colleague because it is honestly what she wants to convey to them and she thinks that they deserve to hear that.

If someone deserves that kind of feedback or recognition then the boss shouldn’t shy away from saying it out of fear of upsetting anyone else. Your boss probably doesn’t see the benefit in walking on eggshells for you or anyone else. And I think that’s reasonable, not insensitive.

And I agree with pp not to over invest yourself in your job. It rarely pays off in the end.

Do your best. Be professional. Have good boundaries.

Work to live, not live to work.

I think your boss is just playing the corporate game, showing support on LinkedIn and looking like they’re a team player. I wouldn’t take it to heart.

I mean this kindly. If your instinct is to stop trying because of this setback then you probably didn't deserve the award. Crack on and win it next time.

I agree with a previous poster that you're taking this too seriously. I don't see anything wrong with what the manager said.

An award? Stop being a lapdog just to get a stupid award.

It's like 'Star of the day' at nursery 🤣

Unless of course the OP is submitting a time sheet for all these extra hours.

So make it about the others? The person won fair and square. We should all be grown up enough in the workplace we don’t need our egos massaged like this and be able to congratulate others on their performance.

My thought exactly. To get people working their arse off for free. It’s pathetic, they must think you are stupid enough to fall for it.

this is such an immature comment. I assume she’s doing the work as she wishes recognition and progression. Recognition comes in many forms, not just awards, and it’s not just a one off thing.

No. An award is immature. People should get recognition for the work they do in salary.

I've always been of the opinion "don't clap, throw money". These type of awards are all very well, but they are a bit like wetting yourself in dark trousers. You get a lovely warm feeling, but nobody else notices.

Maybe I'm just old and cynical though.

You're overthinking. His comment wasn't about you and it sounds like he's generally supportive. As a manager I HATE single winner things at work: one moderately happy winner and 5 irritated near misses...

If the OP comes back and says she's working all those extra hours for free, it's far from an immature comment.

Because 'lapdog' is exactly what she would be.

@rudebosspotentially there is nothing wrong with going the extra mile or working hard but it shouldn’t be necessary to be under that pressure all of the time (depending on the level of role of course). You do need to set some boundaries and not always be available. Do you feel comfortable saying “I have to finish on time today” if asked to work on? Do you feel ok to say “I need to leave early tomorrow but I’m sure you will agree last week’s extra hours will more than cover it” for example? You can do all those and still be reliable, professional and well-thought of. And it should be possible to be very successful without having to be constantly available. As others have said, there is little point in giving your colleague an award without her being the person that most deserved it … it was a little tactless (could have just said ‘well deserved’) but it isn’t about you.

Up the revolution eh?

You don’t even know what her job is, what she’s trying to achieve. Hurling childish insults like lapdog is incredibly childish.

Thank you.

A poor thought out comment from your boss.

I think in your shoes I'd be cutting down on your hours. Doing more than your contracted hours doesn't always mean that you'll get rewarded or better thought of, and it's not a good thing. It means either you aren't managing your time effectively, or your boss isn't managing the workloads. I'd be having a conversation with her about workloads etc and mention that whilst you are more than happy to be flexible but your additional hours means you have no extra bandwidth to deal with emergencies, and the working outside of hours should be the exception and not the rule.

It doesn't matter what her job is.

If she's working for free and upset that her boss praised someone else for getting an award, she's being a lapdog/doormat whatever you want to call it.

What is this award actually worth? Does it carry a cash prize, an extra week's leave, development opportunities? Most workplace awards are the equivalent of a gold star on your chart at primary school-of no value unless you give them that value in your head.

🙄

I don't know what line of work your in but I am well versed in call centre/back office etiquette. Do not do the slightest bit of work more than your paid for. If you do smoke will be blown right up your arse and you will most definitely be exploited! I learned a long time ago doing anything out with your job description will also become part of your job without any of the benefits, you will be expected to not only fill in all of your contracted work but the extra work you landed yourself whilst trying to be helpful 🤣🤣 Noone will thank you, but they will mention it, the second you shy away from your "new" job.