To ask if anyone else doesn't see the appeal of "Travelling"

[LornaDuh]

So many on MN talk about doing lots of travelling in their 20s. Or their DC "going travelling."

Anyone else not see the appeal of backpacking round Asia sharing hostels with randoms and eating authentic street food?

I've worked abroad but that was an office job not picking fruit or working on a cattle ranch in Australia.

I love going on holiday but like coming home after a fortnight ... months on the road don't appeal.

Anyone else?

No I wouldn't fancy it. But then I am from a era when it wasn't really a thing. These are the same people who spend their 20s roaming round the world then complain they can't get on the property ladder in their 30s

Which era?? The 1930s??

Fine. But if you have children wouldn’t you want to at least expose them to travel so they can make a choice?

Because I work full time and have a mortgage. Thinking months-long travelling is unlikely is quite normal in that scenario! I didn’t mention age at all.

I've been travelling as opposed to going on holiday many times, both short trips and long ones, but I think I've had enough of backpacker hostels now. It's different when you're young and don't need much sleep!

Absolutely brilliant 👏

I also can't think of anything worse than 'traveling', but I do enjoy going somewhere and staying there for awhile. It's the transience I don't enjoy.

An exposure to different cultures living completely different ways of life with less money and material possessions. It's eye opening and makes you appreciate more what you have in life.

Isn't this just a 'different people like different things' thread? One of the defining experiences of my life was taking a month to travel solo from Moscow to Beijing by rail. Sorted it all myself, visas, flights, train tickets, accommodation (tickets and hotels usually sorted out on the hoof since this was 2005 and online booking wasn't really a thing for Russian Railways at the time). Saw places I'd never have imagined going to, spent time with people I would never otherwise have met. Found ways to cope despite speaking limited Russian, no Mongolian and no Chinese. And, ultimately, was inspired to live overseas for a decade, which was the best decision of my life.

But all of that only worked because I wanted to go. If I'd been uncomfortable with sleeping on trains, worried about ordering food by pointing at something and hoping it would taste OK (and not be made of something hideous!), anxious about being surrounded by people who didn't speak (much of) my language etc, I'd have stayed at home. Or, if I'd ignored those misgivings and gone anyway, I'd have hated it and vowed never to do anything like it again. And my life would have been very different, but I'd probably have been happy with what I chose for myself because that choice would have suited the wishes for that version of myself.

(And yeah, travels to the mysterious Orient and starts talking about 'versions of myself' - that's like, uh, so zen, man!)

But at some point you pay off mortgage and retire surely? My partner is doing 3 months in South America now he's retired

I guess there is ' roughing it , cheaper ' traveling and ( as someone I know ) the later in life sabbatical type traveling involving business class travel , nice hotels and hire cars.

I do like travelling around - but at 62 I like to do it in comfort !

Likely won’t pay off mortgage til late 60/early 70s. I also said ‘unlikely’, not ‘impossible’. But it is unlikely – very.

My Dc haven't travelled in this fashion as they were affected by Covid and couldn't earn enough money, plus it's all so much more expensive these days. I feel sorry for them. Maybe once they get proper jobs.

I would really love to do Latin America as well, though that will need a lot of research, I guess.

@andyindurham

But all of that only worked because I wanted to go. If I'd been uncomfortable with sleeping on trains, worried about ordering food by pointing at something and hoping it would taste OK (and not be made of something hideous!), anxious about being surrounded by people who didn't speak (much of) my language etc, I'd have stayed at home

See I disagree with this. I think this is exactly the sort of situation where someone can benefit from travel.

I went travelling in my late teens with a girl whose family expressed a lot of the OP’s attitudes. They were endlessly fussing beforehand about where we would stay, how we would get our laundry done, where we could drink water and change money etc etc. What would we do if people couldn’t speak English. They were against the trip in the first place and they micromanaged it to the nth degree. They sent us out with a fucking excel spreadsheet covering everything. Endless sticky notes. Calling her multiple times a day. It was so stifling.

My friend started out incredibly anxious about everything and after three months it was absolutely the making of her. It was incredibly good for her confidence. She figured out at some point that not being able to control things all the time isn’t a bad thing.

Learning to face up to moderately scary but actually relatively safe things and dealing with it is the making of young people.

Again, that doesn’t have to entail going to South East Asia or anywhere exotic but travelling somewhere where your needs won’t automatically be anticipated and catered for is character building in the non ironic sense of the phrase.

I feel like this epidemic of social anxiety we’re seeing among young people in the post pandemic era could be tackled to some extent by helping a lot of people to unclench about things not being exactly like normal and not totally planned all the time. I think travel without western comforts for a bit would be really helpful.

I never saw the appeal of doing it as a student because I couldn't have afforded to stay anywhere nice.

@EmoCourt Great post 😊

I'm with you on not liking the hostels and shared rooms, but I can't imagine not wanting to see and experience more of the world than an annual 2 week holiday to the Med, so on balance I'd accept the hostel dorms if that's what I needed to do to make that happen.

I've met fascinating people all over the world, and people from all over the world where I live now (it's quite an international place whereas my home town is fairly insular). Meeting people with a different background and experience to yourself is mind-opening.

If home was my childhood bedroom I'd rather be in a sweaty hostel.

Travelling was the greatest thing I ever did.

People are different. You sound like my brother and the rest of my family. They're happy living in the same area they grew up in.

I find them boring and parochial. Horses for courses.

So many on MN talk about doing lots of travelling in their 20s. Or their DC "going travelling."

May I ask roughly how old you are? Attitudes do change with age.

"Anyone else not see the appeal of backpacking round Asia sharing hostels with randoms and eating authentic street food?"

When I was 19, I saved up and then went travelling before I went to university. And this really was the sort of travelling that you dislike - 11 weeks camping from London to Kathmandu.

We camped in tents throughout. Outside of Europe it was often "wild" camping with no facilities. Rather than "street food" we would go to the local markets to buy fresh food.

It's an experience that I still treasure and will always remember.

However, would I do it again at my age no - hell no!

But you seem to be conflating "travelling" with "backpacking". Those two things aren't necessarily the same. You can go travelling at any level of comfort that you can afford. And also go entirely on your own or with just your family.

"Having to sort your laundry out on the road. Being with the same people all day every day. I like my friends but have had enough of them after a dog walk/coffee/lunch!"

You can easily travel with just your family, but if you also find them a bit too much as well then that's not the answer. But, yes, if you are away for weeks at a time then you are going to have to do some laundry.

But even then, doing the laundry may not be so much of a chore. A family member has recently retired and they now have a motorhome that costs as much as the average mortgage. It's got all the facilities you would ever want, including high speed internet.

Next year they are planning on spending six months (from April to September) travelling to China and back. They are using the assistance of a travel company to arrange all the necessary visas and permits etc.

Their route from Turkey is then to Iran, Turkmenistan, Uzbekistan, Kazakhstan. From there into China and head on east to Beijing. From there return west through the usual tourist places like Xian and Chengdu to Tibet and Lhasa and Kashgar. From there, cross over to Kyrgyzstan and return to Turkey and then the UK.

I hate to think how much that will be costing them.

But it does show that "travelling" doesn't have to only be done at the level of backpacking and eating street food.

If I could just arrive at destinations without the actual travel part, that would be ideal. I’d see everything.

Like Star Trek

I completely get that people want to see the world and travelling is of course a part of seeing what else is out there. My issue is the people who measure their self worth by being seen in the "right" places regularly and on social media (skiing in winter, on a yacht in summer, Dubai each year...) as these are essential for their career.

@Thepeopleversuswork Sure, I get what you're saying. I'm just referring to my experience and my self-perception. I was late 20s when I did my trip. In my late teens, I don't believe I would have coped well with it and the trip would have confirmed my prejudices and fears. More realistically, I'd have listened to my parents' (mother's!) anxieties, taken them on board and stayed home. Your friend, presumably, wanted to go on the trip with you despite her misgivings. I wasn't really ready for that for another decade or so. Another person maybe wouldn't be ready until retirement. We're all different.

But yes to your general point about building independence and resilience. The best thing I heard in the first week of the holidays was how DD7 is looking forward to a possible overnight school trip (as long as she can take her toy sloth). Previously, the thought of a night away from mam and dad terrified her, now she's starting to think about sleepovers with her friends. I'm really proud that she's making these steps, and even happier that it's coming from her rather than us trying to steer her.