Neighbours kids playing outside early…

[FooFightersFan]

It’s the school holidays and I appreciate that by starting this thread I’m going to sound like a right grump, but here goes…

Our garden backs onto two houses, both of which are owned by couples with young kids. All four parents work from home full time.

The kids (youngest 3, all primary school aged) regularly play outside in the gardens. The houses are new build with literally no plants or shrubs. Just lawn surrounded by fence / brick walls. The noise just bounces around as there is nothing to ‘absorb’ it.

I accept that they are noisy when they play because they are young, energetic and kids!

Now that the school summer holidays are well under way, it’s become apparent that getting up and out into the garden at 8am is their routine. And they shout. A lot.
Then at 10am they go inside and there is silence for a while.

I can deal with it, I have 2 kids and I appreciate that’s what kids are like.

and here’s the “but”…

My son works full time and his room overlooks our back garden. He works 12 hour shifts a lot of days, in hospitality. Most shifts mean he is home around 11pm and in bed by midnight. He’s getting increasingly fed up with the neighbour kids’ morning routine.

During term time, the outside playing is just at the weekend. But now it’s a daily occurrence due to the holidays, I really feel for my son, because being woken up 90 mins before he needs to be up for his next shift is pretty miserable.

WIBU to message or pop round to my neighbours and see if they can encourage their kids to be quieter (a big ask) or to not let them out before 9:00.

I’ve become that grumpy neighbour 😩

YABU

If you don't think you are being unreasonable why ask us?
Go round, ask them to keep their kids in, ask them to keep them quiet, then post the outcome 😃

Oh bless, that is sweet! They must be really nice children.

Young children do shriek a lot in the garden, no doubt about that. 8am is a bit much at weekends (mine wouldn't have been up, nor would I), but they won't be doing it during the week when they are back at school so it is hardly worth making a fuss about it. I second some good ear plugs for son.

Agree. I dread to think just how many posters have children who scream a lot and don't get told to stop because they are children and only playing!

No it is not.

100% agree.

But obviously their happiness, their children’s happiness trumps everyone else’s.

Not unless you're getting up at 4 a.m.

Well there's no finding middle ground with people who take a step backwards then ask you to meet them in the middle. However I would be happy with 7am, as the end of normal night time hours, on days I am not up at 6am for work. Others are saying 9am. 8 is in the middle and a good compromise.

So you are a 'let's step backwards to something ridiculous like midday then ask to meet in the middle' person I see.

8am is early! I'm with you. I am cautious about my son playing out before 9.30am tbh.

I'd find it bloody annoying. I'm with you.

Not sure what you can do though

I feel 8 am is early.
How would they feel if it was the other way round and your son brought some friends back and were chilling in the garden until 3am?
Hospitality is hard work and he wont be going to sleep until after midnight/1 am at least.
A reasonable request of keeping them in until after 9 isn't too much to ask. When mine were younger I wouldn't let them go out until then at the weekend and during the holidays.

That’s not the point, it was the fact that at 8am most people are up and out to work etc and can’t pander to everyone working unsociable hours. If someone’s kids are screaming bloody murder then that’s a different issue and not acceptable

My DC aren’t allowed to scream, full stop. Never mind outdoors at 8am. It’s lazy parenting. We have elderly neighbours and one is terminally ill and one has an autistic grandchild so we can’t have screaming, it’s just pure selfishness to go on like that.

So this morning the playing kicked off around 7:45am. As usual, all went quiet around 10am. And by this afternoon we had 3 tennis balls arrive in the garden.

So earlier I gathered them up and popped round to the neighbours house. The kids were playing in the garden of the other house, so I felt that was a good time to approach the parents of the little boy.

I have spoken with them a few times before so we aren’t complete strangers. Mum was out, but dad was there and when he saw me with the tennis balls he almost apologised straight away!

I asked him if noisy outside play could start a little bit later in the day, and he was so lovely about it. I explained about my DS working long hours, and he was understanding. We agreed that maybe 9am at the earliest, at least at the weekend, was reasonable.

We will see how things pan out…

Personally, when my children were small, I wouldn’t allow them out in the garden before 9am. Even now, DH and I don’t mow lawn or allow dog to go out and bark before 9am. I think your neighbours are being unreasonable. How would they feel if you were out making noise at their DC bedtimes. I’m sure they’d soon complain.

11pm to 7am are nighttime hours for noise. Therefore 8am is comparable to 10pm not 3am.

Most people are up and put by 8am. On a campsite uts quiet between 11-7. 11pm is extremely late to me even on holiday but I accept that's within normal parameters.

Oh good
Let's keep them out the son, watching TV until mid morning...

So you are a 'let's step backwards to something ridiculous like midday then ask to meet in the middle' person I see.

I was trying to point out that 'middle ground' is an irrelevant concept when you're talking about a time of day that's far closer to the beginning of many people's mornings than the end. Because you're not talking about meeting in the middle.

@Piggiesinblankets yes. Campsite rules are pretty strictly adhered to aren’t they? I miss camping trips with my boys. In bed by 11pm and the shuffling to the toilet block in my pyjamas and crocs at 6:30am and thinking that was a sane time
to get up 😂

The middle isn't the middle of the morning. It's the middle of what neighbour a feels is acceptable and what neighbour b does.

So if I feel 7am is acceptable (I wouldn't usually be bothered by 6am and I've recently been woken by crows at half five but occasionally sleep in on a Sunday) and someone else feels 9am is acceptable then 8am is the middle. It's also allowing an extra hour on top of nighttime noise hours of 11pm to 7am so showing goodwill there.

Nonsense. Most people are not up and about at 8am. My job is freelance and I sometimes work 4pm til midnight - especially when DH is on lates, and I don't get up til 9.30-10am the next day. Sometimes I am up at 6am and start work very early. Should I blast my music loud while I am working, because I am up, and fuck everyone else?! NO, because I am not an arsehole.

Ludicrous comment to make. Many people I know work hours that are not 9-5, and they are not up and about at 8am. Especially those who work for the NHS, and the police, and the fire service, and also in hospitality/hotel work. DH works all kinds of odd shifts because of the career he's in. So does my brother, and my next door neighbour, and my friend's husband, (to name but a few.)

Your comment is ignorant, ill-informed, and narrow minded.

If you have really good noise insulating windows and they are closed, the children must be insanely noisy to wake your son? We can have fireworks going off in the next door field and it won't wake our girls

Maybe look at improving your windows if they don't block out enough noise.

This would mean no noise at anytime then? If I had worked 6am to 6pm then I'd be in bed at 9. If I had finished at 6am and was working that night I'd be sleeping in the day. Daytime hours are the most common time to work or to be up doing things though.

I have never let my kids out before 9.30 to play in the garden especially at weekends. YANBU.