DH's job - he didn't put kids & I on his private medical insurance

[CrikeyMajikey]

Last year DH returned to being a full time employee with his previous employer (having been self employed for the last 8 years). We have 2 teenage DC, one has an on going medical condition, nothing life threatening but uncomfortable and needs surgery. At the time he signed his contract of employment I asked him to check if pre-existing medical conditions were accepted as we'd been on the NHS waiting list for 2 years. DH said 'yeah, yeah, yeah'. At the same time the NHS made contact and we have continued down that route and the operation is within weeks. In the meantime, something quite urgent has cropped up and I asked DH to check out his private medical insurance. It turns out that he never added the DC and I to his policy when he signed his contract last year - and yes he did know about it as we were previously on the policy. We can be added in a few months time when the policy is renewed, and yes, pre-existing conditions are included. I'm so done with his self absorbed and thoughtless behaviour that I can't even get myself angry about it..

YANBU - it's outrageous and his family should have been a priority
YABU - let it go

YANBU what an inconsiderate dick. I added my family on and it took 5 minutes

What. On. Earth.
Your child has a serious condition and it wasn’t the first thing he thought of when thinking about medical insurance??

What a selfish arsehole.

Well you're not being unreasonable in one sense, however even with pre-existing medical conditions a new policy is highly unlikely to have covered surgery for your DC as they were already on a waiting list. So chalk it up to experience but make sure he adds you all in future.

I’m pretty sure that’s not true. I’ve always had private medical through work and I’m responsible for administering the policy in my current job. All pre-existing conditions are covered, no one asks if you’re already on a waiting list. Normally you just need a referral letter which, in my experience, has always been extremely easy to get.

OP, your husband was a dick.

Maybe you couldn’t be added? Or there was extra cost involved? Certainly a known issue would be a problem. As the benefit would have been of higher value I think he would have paid more tax. Should have discussed all of this with you though. What did you do when he was self employed?

I just looked into the private medical that my employer offers (that we’d have to pay for, it isn’t free) and no pre-existing conditions are covered! They are very explicitly excluded. I’m very envious!

Thank you for this. They will add us when the policy renews, including pre-existing condition, of which we now have 2.

He’s definitely a dick.

I don't think you need to wait for renewal, you just pay the extra charge pro-rata for the rest of this renewal period, why wait?

This is not my experience.

Many generous policies still state a moratorium.

That isn’t discounting DHs behaviour.

Have you checked what the additional charge is in adding you and the kids? My husband didn’t add me and the kids on his work policy as the company only pays for him and to add us would have cost him/us several hundred pounds a month - ie thousands a year.

It all depends on the policy. Ours sounds like OP’s husband in that the policy year starts in October and that’s the only time you can add someone new, and all pre-existing conditions are covered. In our case, it’s a taxable benefit for the employee and you pay a premium for any family members to be included.

There's significant extra cost, even if the company pays you have to pay tax on it

You are lucky. There are very few corporate covers which are not underwritten. My private Bupa workplace covers always excluded anything pre-existing and that is pretty much standard. Yours is a dying breed sadly.

Not true in my experience with BUPA.

eeerr you can be added inter year as it were if there has been a ‘life style event’, like the fact that you and the kids were on your corporate cover but then you were made redundant so lost the cover. Your DH just has to mail the cover people and ask if you can be added due to the ‘life style event’. They don’t usually ask for proof.

but yeah he’s a dick

No words!

DH has added dc after he phoned parents re birth of dc.

It’s not that significant when you make use of the benefits. It’s a taxable benefit, so you only pay tax on the benefit. Last year I’ve seen a consultant at least once a month for an underlying issue, had two operations, child had scans and heart monitoring, and husband had many dermatologist appointments. Absolutely worth my personal tax allowance reduced by the benefit.

Disagree with this, my Bupa policy paid out for a pre existing condition.

Yep, we did this. The husband is unbelievable.

Is this an isolated bit of twattishness, OP, or is it part of a broader pattern?

What a cock

At my work there is a window to join to stop people waiting until they actually need it. Also the main policy holder is accepted and any pre existing medical conditions are ignored but for anyone else added they are included.
he was very thoughtless not to include you.

Every policy is different, literally, even the same provider. There’s no point anyone suggesting mine covered X as it’s not universal.

If he is generally a decent guy, I am not going to call him a dick, because I don't believe you can judge an entire character off one incident.
More likely that in the new job haze and busyness, it simply got overlooked. Human error. It happens.

We managed to do the opposite. I had private cover, including H and kids at substantial extra cost to me. He started a new job, added me and the kids to his without consulting me. We didn't realize for about 2 years.

Yup, thats jammy, have had several different policies and previous conditions never covered not even by late husbands paid for by the company rolls royce cover