DH's job - he didn't put kids & I on his private medical insurance

[CrikeyMajikey]

Last year DH returned to being a full time employee with his previous employer (having been self employed for the last 8 years). We have 2 teenage DC, one has an on going medical condition, nothing life threatening but uncomfortable and needs surgery. At the time he signed his contract of employment I asked him to check if pre-existing medical conditions were accepted as we'd been on the NHS waiting list for 2 years. DH said 'yeah, yeah, yeah'. At the same time the NHS made contact and we have continued down that route and the operation is within weeks. In the meantime, something quite urgent has cropped up and I asked DH to check out his private medical insurance. It turns out that he never added the DC and I to his policy when he signed his contract last year - and yes he did know about it as we were previously on the policy. We can be added in a few months time when the policy is renewed, and yes, pre-existing conditions are included. I'm so done with his self absorbed and thoughtless behaviour that I can't even get myself angry about it..

YANBU - it's outrageous and his family should have been a priority
YABU - let it go

YANBU.
Discussing other companies policies is a bit irrelevant - his company offers a good one, all it would have cost him to insure you all from the off was a relatively modest amount of tax and a little bit of time and attention. It's hard to fathom how he could have neglected to do this for a kid who he knew would benefit from it.

My kids are on mine, husband isn't. It impacts my pay and he doesn't want to pay for it.

All work ones we have ever had cover all pre existing conditions

Pretty sure my husband has himself on his with his ritzy private treatment, we aren’t on, nor could he really care less about us.

Oh that's rubbish! I'm sorry.

Oh that's weird. I've been under 3 different companies over the years and every one of them have covered pre-existing. Thank goodness as when I moved to my current job a year ago I'd recently had cancer and had developed a slight heart condition (thank you chemo) both of which are covered by the current policy.

After posting the above I've seen a couple of other people say they don't have pre-existing conditions covered so apologies. I guess it's mine that are weird not the other way round...

To whomever said just add you now, that's not always possible. In my last job there were two windows a year where you could add or remove people, only exception being major life events like birth of a child.

Where we are now we are covered by Vitality and you can add/remove people at any time. So it varies.

You can get MHD policies (medical history disregarded), but they are a lot more expensive for employers, so depends if the OP husband has one of these.

Yabu for writing "dh didn't add I to the insurance". Affected and sounds like a toddler talking

🙄

I didn't add DH and DC to mine because it would have cost ££££ we didn't have. Are you sure you can all sit be added or wouldn't have a monthly salary sacrificice. There should still be a discussion, but I think it would be unusual to do be able to do it for nothing?

It woukd also be really unusual for pre-exisiting conditions to be covered.

Not a dying breed… ours has gone from not including pre-existing conditions to including them.

Good companies will pay the premiums and good insurers will have better conditions.

YANBU, what a dick. Has he done it because he didn't want to pay the small fee to add his family?

To whomever said just add you now, that's not always possible. In my last job there were two windows a year where you could add or remove people, only exception being major life events like birth of a child.

Mine likewise.

I think mine covered pre-existing conditions, and certainly covers DH and I now for the various issues we've acquired over the years since I joined up - even though the provider has switched between bupa an AXA ppp a few times. (Travel insurance too). But if your/your OHs scheme doesn't include pre-existing conditions then that's all the more reason to get signed up asap!

On corporate policies pre-exisitings often are covered. My policy through work covers pre-existing conditions. I was surprised too .

She said 'he never added the DC and I to his policy'.

Are you saying she should have deliberately used incorrect grammar to please you?

My DHs AXA policy cost him £4k extra a year in tax (to add me and children) and that was without any pre existing conditions (which they refused to cover).

In my experience once you have an existing condition they either push the price up so much that it is not affordable to cover it or they exclude it.

It just depends what your employer is willing to pay for. I had surgery on a pre existing condition with BUPA a few years ago. The company just added me to the policy and I called BUPA up including confessing I’d had the condition for years and was on a lengthy NHS waiting list and they sent me a list surgeons to choose from - and off we went. Brilliant!

All my corporate policies have included pre-existing conditions. It costs me £90 per month for the whole family and, given the state of the NHS, we use it all the time - including for virtual GP appointments. Absolutely worth it. You can normally only change who is covered once per year or following a major life event.

At best, your DH has been negligent in not maximising his employee benefits for the good of his family.

@diktat If it really matters, she should have used "me". It is the two things, the children and the OP that confuse matters. To check drop the children and see which pronouns fit. Nobody would say that "he didn't add I to the policy". They would say "he didn't add me to the policy".

Anyway, I do think the OP's husband was very thoughtless. I hope the surgery goes well.

Surprised to see so many with corporate covers that cover pre-existing conditions. Never had that and none of my friends have it. But good to see it's still around in some places!

I couldn't stomach being married to such a selfish thoughtless prick.
What a moron.
God help you and your poor children.
I honestly couldn't look at him.

Lots of employees might be covered for pre existing conditions but children and wife might not be. It’s not the same policy for everyone. We haven’t seen the policy. They can be tailored to fit the company and new employees might not get the same as existing ones. I bet there’s a reason why family was excluded initially.