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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

For blocking him ?

67 replies

CleverOpalPanda · 22/07/2024 12:43

Guy I am talking for 2 months and went on 2 dates left me on read last nite.
He talked to me first and after I replied he would just send dry responses and he does that frequently so I give cold responses as well but I ask him things to get convo going, he doesn't.
Last nite I asked him if he is busy and he said no just relaxing so then I told him I am sitting around being confused and that he should call me if he can as I want to speak to him.
He saw that text last night and hasnt replied yet .
He is at work now but many times he texts early in morning so I got so upset I blocked him on whatapp.
Am I being unreasonable for blocking him ?it's not been 24 hrs yet.
I don't like that I did it but I feel I am getting played, he talks first and then he responds not in a very productive way.
Only 3 days ago we were being overly flirty and now cold again.

Small clarification:first month we were travelling ,we couldn't meet.
Last date was 3 weeks ago and he texts everyday but I am still confused.

OP posts:
YouJustDoYou · 22/07/2024 12:45

You both sound like hard work.

OMGsamesame · 22/07/2024 12:45

2 dates in 2 months is nothing. Unless that's the level of interaction you're looking for then throw this one back and don't give him another thought (except perhaps, if this is not the level of interaction you want, ask yourself why you let it go on hot and cold for so long?)

Sunisshiningweatherissweet2 · 22/07/2024 12:48

YANBU. Let him play games on his own. He's clearly NOTinterested just playing power games.

Bern there, just cut it off.

Sunisshiningweatherissweet2 · 22/07/2024 12:48

Been*

BigPussyEnergy · 22/07/2024 12:49

If he wanted to see you/speak to you, he would. If he isn’t seeing you/chatting then he doesn’t want to. Bin him.

Original poster
CleverOpalPanda · 22/07/2024 12:52

@BigPussyEnergy
I wonder if he is doing it on purpose to see if I will go crazy on him,that would be worse than not being interested,he is in his 40s

OP posts:
Cardinalita90 · 22/07/2024 12:55

You clearly aren't compatible so just move on - stop the daft gameplaying (blocking, being cold) and overthinking. It's been 2 dates, you shouldn't be giving the guy so much headspace especially when it's been 3 weeks since your last date! If either of you were properly interested you'd have met again by now .

Alice2024 · 22/07/2024 12:59

YouJustDoYou · 22/07/2024 12:45

You both sound like hard work.

100%. He's looking for/got FWB and she's asking everyone she knows to read his texts and interpret them. If I had my time again I'd be Marjory Proops.

ToofHurty · 22/07/2024 13:00

2 dates in 2 months, the last date being 3 weeks ago?

Sorry but he’s not into you at all and I doubt you’re really that into him. If you were then one of you would have made a third date happen by now.

Keep him blocked and don’t give him any more headspace.

Original poster
CleverOpalPanda · 22/07/2024 13:04

@ToofHurty
I am really into him I asked him out 2 weeks ago but he had other plans,he didn't ask for another day so out of fear of sounding like I am chasing I haven't asked again.
It's up to him to ask now

OP posts:
Original poster
CleverOpalPanda · 22/07/2024 13:05

@Alice2024
We haven't slept together

OP posts:
Alice2024 · 22/07/2024 13:14

Or, you could put your big girl pants on, tell him how you feel and ask for clarification or you're done with it. You have to have your own back, say what you want and leave if you are told to compromise!

Original poster
CleverOpalPanda · 22/07/2024 13:25

@Alice2024
I have had the thought of doing that for some time now but all my friends tell me to keep it cool and act unbothered cause if he sees I am interested he might take me for granted.
I am quite new to dating and although I am a very straightforward person I have never been more confused as to what to do

OP posts:
Alice2024 · 22/07/2024 13:36

CleverOpalPanda · 22/07/2024 13:25

@Alice2024
I have had the thought of doing that for some time now but all my friends tell me to keep it cool and act unbothered cause if he sees I am interested he might take me for granted.
I am quite new to dating and although I am a very straightforward person I have never been more confused as to what to do

Do it for you, not them, OP. They aren't in this relationship, you are. Tell him what you want and where you stand, if he isn't on the same page it's that simple. You can do it. What's more, it sounds like you do it in other areas of your life? What's stopping you?

sassyclassyandsmartassy · 22/07/2024 13:53

Anyone that’s potential positive relationship material wouldn’t make it this hard. Move on.

Imbusytodaysorry · 22/07/2024 14:00

He is just feeding you enough to keep you handing around.
He may pick you up again if he is bored but he is not interested in you .

DaisyChain505 · 22/07/2024 14:01

if this man was interested in you, you would know it.

he would be asking consistently to see you and your text conversation would flow.

instead he’s stringing you along, not replying to you and basically getting back in touch with you when he’s bored.

he’s shown you who he is, believe him.

you deserve more and will find it but not whilst you’re wasting time on emotionally unavailable men like this.

RachTheAlpaca · 22/07/2024 14:03

Sorry but you both sound like a pair of kids
I thought you were about 14 when I first read this.
If he's giving you funny responses and you're being cold back, it isn't going to work out is it. Tell him you're not interested in continuing this silliness and block him, move on.

Idontjetwashthefucker · 22/07/2024 14:12

You asked him out 2 weeks ago, he had other plans and didn't suggest an alternative. He's not interested

Noseybookworm · 22/07/2024 14:22

He's just not that into you 🤷‍♀️ men aren't complicated, if he was really interested in you he would be making MUCH more effort. Drop him and move on.

Alice2024 · 22/07/2024 14:25

You know you won't enjoy his answer, you still need to hear it or to decide it's irrelevant and walk away. It is what is. Good luck.

JLou08 · 22/07/2024 14:44

You sound really intense. There's only been 2 dates and you blocking him because he didn't respond straight away is way over the top. Your message was pretty intense and if I'd had a long day at work I wouldn't be calling someone after that message either, I'd want to relax and also have a chance to think about what I want to do going forward. Once I'd seen they had blocked me I don't think I would want to see them again.
I don't think anyone should be confused after 2 dates, it's clearly a very casual relationship and you should be at the stage of getting to know each other, not having serious chats about your relationship.

EG94 · 22/07/2024 14:53

I read something that said.. if a man likes you you’ll know, if you’re confused he doesn’t. Trust your gut

Original poster
CleverOpalPanda · 22/07/2024 14:53

@JLou08
I don't see what is intense about my message ,I simply told him to call me if he can cause I want to speak to him.
I didn't order him to do so and I said I want not need.
I wanted to express my self via a phone call not messages and I wasnt even going to be nasty about it or anything just be polite.
Would it be hard to text me ,I had a long day I will speak to you tomorrow?

OP posts:
TwattyMcFuckFace · 22/07/2024 14:56

so then I told him I am sitting around being confused and that he should call me if he can as I want to speak to him.

What did you mean by 'sitting around being confused'?

Did you tell him why you want to speak to him?