colleague kissed me and then ghosted me

[weirdwasp]

There seemed to be a mutual interest, we started talking, texting, met up, and kissed.

Then suddenly he backtracked, acted like nothing happened. I confronted him and he said 'This has too much potential to be awkward, it's too risky, I'm really sorry. It's just not a good idea.'
Fwiw we're in an open plan office of around 100 people, on the same floor.
The only time we see each other is walking through the office/lunchtime/arriving and leaving, our work is totally separate.
Do you think it was genuine from him? Or just a lie? I told him it was fine, now he just looks sheepish and tries to avoid me.

oh i know that one

They have some serious issues going on. Tbh they sound very very odd indeed

you also started a thread at the same time about a friend (female) who isn’t replaying to your messages

OP… you are coming across as somewhat…. needy? you had one snog with a bloke you knew from work and now he feels a bit awkward as correctly senses you want more

and at the same time as thinking about that, you’re also cross with your friend for not messaging you

Of course I wanted more, that's why I kissed him. I wasn't really intending to just kiss him then nothing else.

I don't think I'm coming across as needy, no. It's normal to be a bit confused about a friend making plans then not following through, no longer initiating etc.

To be fair, I'd probably feel pretty bad/embarrassed too if I kissed someone then suddenly decided I didn't want it. It's not a crime obviously but I guess the awkwardness line has been crossed.
I'm sure there might be other men there who have less of an issue with it (hopefully!)

how old are you op? and him? how long have you been at the company?

Or maybe he was just no longer interested…?

Are you serial poster, always posting about this stuff? Sounds very familiar

He clearly doesn't fancy you and that stings but it's life

Nope, not posted this before.

I don't want to sound like rude, but this sounds kinda a bit teenagy

I think I've gotten all I need from this thread tbh, I don't see how it sounds teenagery but whatever.

He's not worth worrying about, If he wants to act awkward about what happened that's fine, I'll just get on with my job and not bother any further.

I think you've got me confused with someone else, I have not posted about this man.

I genuinely have no idea what you're referring to with the first job I've enjoyed. Sorry.

My first thought was that he was thinking ahead to the possibility that you break up, there's bad feeling and the difficulties that you would then have at work.

If I had posted before I would admit it, but sincerely, I haven't talked about this man before and hopefully I never will again, unless it's something more positive.

Don't worry - that person is being spiteful. Ignore them. There's a lot of bullies on MN these days.

Thank you.
I can totally understand if it sounds similar.
I'm sure I'm hardly the only person on here who's had an (unfortunate) dalliance with a colleague that didn't work out!
I have read similar things, and it does make me hesitant about the idea of colleagues in the future.
There are other men I've found attractive there but I'm more reluctant now.