Are parents just absolutely exhausted all the time?

[Englishrose223]

Might be a stupid question but when I look after my neices (6 and 3) I literally feel like a bus has hit me.

This is why I don't have kids. I couldn't deal with that level of exhaustion day in, day out.

Nope. Have one teenage dd. She's never given me an ounce of bother (self inflicted worry yes though). 2 kids a different story though.

Yeah I'm really put off tbh. I'm tired enough just with work. I couldn't be exhausted all the time like this.

You get used to it actually and it becomes the new normal

Yes but when it's your own children the love makes it less tiring. It's more tiring looking after other people's kids because you don't have that bond and reward of knowing the hard work is your investment.

I think age makes a difference. I had my eldest dc in early twenties and don't really remember being tired but my younger in my thirties and so tired

Now mine are teens it's only because I keep going out really late at night because I can that I'm so knackered!

I think if you're not used to looking after young children then of course it's exhausting.

I'm in my mid 30s with a 2 year old and work full time. I'm not exhausted. I don't feel any more tired then when I did before I had my child. Yes there's tiring days but there was before that. I still have energy to meet friends throughout the week and do housework. It isn't always the doom and gloom it's made out to be!

Yes. Its insane.

Physically shattered when they are little, emotionally shattered now they are teens!

My youngest didn’t really sleep at all for 3 years. So I got used to permanent exhaustion. Now they are 8 and 10 and sleep well and are less demanding. I’m tired but definitely not as tired

I don't think I regularly felt like that tbh, certainly not at those ages, once they could sleep well (around 9 months) life just got easier. We were pretty young by today's standards though; I was studying, working, commuting, chaotic really when I look back but I don't look back and remember being exhausted (except getting up, I'm not a morning person and really missed lying in!)

I do feel totally exhausted looking after or being around other children though, you have to put on a much friendlier persona than I do my own kids and it's exhausting 😂

No, I wasn't. Between the two of us, we both managed to tag team and both get enough sleep at the times that could have left us sleep deprived. Obviously there are times when you're tired but it wasn't most of the time for us.

You just adapt

Yes. 2.5 year olds. Was saying to my partner today I wonder when we will be able to relax in our own home again 🙃

I remember a family member telling me that the good thing about being a parent is that you never get tired. Since you are always tired already you can't get tired!

I think looking after other people’s DC is way more knackering than your own.

Yes!! There is a lull between about age 4 and early teens but then you get the staying out late with mates years so if you have more than two you're knackered forever!!! I personally can't sleep till all mine are home.

I've been exhausted for the last 21 years, although the eldest was and is certainly an 'easy' child. Given the youngest is still in KS1, I've got a long way to go yet! You get to the point that exhaustion is your 'normal' state of being though.

No, I haven't been regularly exhausted since my youngest turned 3 or so. I've got a 9 year old and a 6 year old now and there is nothing exhausting about it.

Sure there's an occasional night when one of them wakes up ill but it's rare.

But surely the relentless nature of it all? One if them always needs something and the endless cooking cleaning, getting them to places

Please don't wait more weeks to see a midwife if you have felt awful for weeks already. Go and see a GP and get checked out.

Not really. They play a lot of the time and are now old enough to get themselves things to eat and drink and do their own basic self care like dressing and washing. The older one gets herself most places and organises her own social life. I enjoy cycling places with my younger child.

Obviously they have their moments and I'm sure the teenage years will bring new challenges, but my kids are pretty chill usually. We have fun together.

Yes we adults still have cooking and cleaning to do and it's undoubtedly more than it would be without kids. It can definitely be annoying with the amount of mess they create, with telling them 1000 times to do something, when they are bickering. But it's far from exhausting.

I also agree with PP that other people's children are much more wearing.

I know mine inside out, better than any other humans on the planet, I'm an expert on them and how to look after them. Of course I'm relaxed with them.

Other people's children are never as easy because you're not so used to them. And they're not so used to you.

I strongly believe its only as relentless as you want it to be. I don't spend all my time doing endless cooking and cleaning, not any more than I did before. Children reach an age where if they want something they can get it themselves. Even my 2 year old is quite capable of getting his own shoes, picking out his own story etc. And they won't always need ferris about everywhere too