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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be filled with regrets about my parenting choices

59 replies

MontyTigger · 11/07/2024 12:12

Iam so upset with some of my parenting choices and beating myself up so bad.

I wish I could rewind and do things differently to have created better opportunities for my children.

How can I forgive myself?

OP posts:
SmileyHappyPeopleInTheSun · 11/07/2024 12:59

I beat myself up about the secondary school - couldn't have foreseen how bad it would get - but the focus has to be getting them through it and on to better.

With DD2 now that has meant for two subjects - actually sitting down and practically teaching - making sure she uses any apps school have and paying for other and books and emphasis she need to do as well as she can - without stressing her so much it has an adverse effect on her. She'll likely do well enough to be able to get where she needs - many of her friends aren't as lucky.

SpidersAreShitheads · 11/07/2024 13:07

Why do you wish you pushed them harder OP?

I think that’s quite an unusual regret. I don’t think there’s any parent out there who thinks they got everything right but if your children are happy and healthy, I’d say you’ve got nothing to worry about.

Young adults/adults have the autonomy to pursue things they choose even if they weren’t “pushed”. I have seen some children who were pushed and they didn’t have the best childhood at all.

vitahelp · 11/07/2024 13:19

I'm sorry you're feeling like this. Have there been any negative consequence of you not doing the things you feel you should have done? How old are your children now and are they happy?

I would worry more about a child who has been over-pushed, than one who hasn't been pushed enough.

EasternStandard · 11/07/2024 13:20

How old are they?

Hadalifeonce · 11/07/2024 13:24

Every time I used to try to push my two, they just pushed back.
I realised pushing was no good. I supported them in their choices, I offered guidance when requested, and made sure they knew they could come to me for anything.
Do I agree with their life choices? Not always. But they are both lovely people who function well in society; they have chosen different paths to the ones I thought they would, but that's not on me as their parent.

Favouritefruits · 11/07/2024 13:25

Well you feeling guilty and upset about the past isn’t going to go anyone any good, all you can do is your best from now on!

combinationpadlock · 11/07/2024 13:25

MontyTigger · 11/07/2024 12:34

Thanks for replies

Wishing I had pushed them harder
Am so furious at myself
I did my best based on what I knew at the time
But now full of regrets about certain choices at certain moments don't know how to forgive myself

because you did the best you knew at the time, and that is all anyone can do. Pushing them harder might not have gone well, anyway, they might not have achieved anything, or they might have achieved well but been unhappy. You don't know.

I pushed mine quite hard, but not a lot to show for it now! 😂

HighHeelsOnCobblestones · 11/07/2024 13:27

I was coming here to say that I’m willing to bet you made the best choices you could with the information you had available at the time. But I see you’ve already worked that out.

So what exactly do you have to forgive yourself for? For not being clairvoyant? That’s the only way you could have done anything different and doing anything different doesn’t mean it would have been better.

Berringtons · 11/07/2024 13:45

No matter how hard you pushed them you could have always have pushed them harder

Is your child playing Chess for UK at 9? No? Why is your family so lazy? Come on - chop! chop! Winner takes it all, stop doing "screen time" it's time to hustle...

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c3g6e653wrlo

Collexifon · 11/07/2024 13:48

Elephant007 · 11/07/2024 12:39

Can I be completely honest?

You have to get over it and move on from the past, nothing you can do can make you go back in time and change things. It’s impossible.

Focus on supporting your children now to live their dreams and offer support if they need it

By living with regrets you are just taking away the joy and support that you could be feeling now!

This. Absolutely. Be the best parent you can be from today.

AnneElliott · 11/07/2024 13:59

If you did your best op and put their needs before your own then I'm not sure what you need forgiveness for?

We've all made mistakes of course but I think if you can honestly say you did your best for them at the time then that's the important thing.

PerfectTravelTote · 11/07/2024 14:02

Yabu. Parenting is hard. We're all just doing our best.

Daisybuttercup12345 · 11/07/2024 14:07

MontyTigger · 11/07/2024 12:52

Thank you for replies. Really appreciated.

I know I need to get over past choices , whoch were made with best intentions and knowledge i had at the time, and support them as they are now.

It just feels very very hard to forgive myself.

I pushed my boys. Both did well and have high paying jobs.
However they had to move away for work. Now I hardly see them.
Sometimes I wish I hadn't pushed and they were in normal jobs and living locally.
Don't worry, you did what was best at the time.
Ps both went to state schools.

Karatema · 11/07/2024 14:12

Look to the future.
Your DC have made choices that will have been affected by your choices but if you'd made different choices then their decisions may have been worse!
You cannot change the past, look to the future.

MonsteraMama · 11/07/2024 14:18

Pushing for excellence isn't always a good parenting choice, my mam tried and I pushed back ten times harder.

You gave them your best and did what you could. There's no such thing as a perfect parent. Just be the best you can be NOW and stop worrying about things you can't change.

SummerHouse · 11/07/2024 14:28

Life is too short for this. I regret my steely determination to make my child do all the school work during covid. I went to war against that poor 9 yr old. Utterly pointless. I forgive myself. We are very slack now. But I have just discovered that bribery is fun. I was going to give them spending money for a holiday anyway but paid them to read instead (bucks for books). I am not saying this is good parenting but it's a means to an end for us for this specific problem. They love reading, they just forgot and needed an incentive. Hopefully they will carry on reading but who knows... There's probably loads of things you do that are perfect and brilliant. You need to recognise them and tell yourself "well bloody done!"

IdLikeToBeAFraser · 11/07/2024 14:31

Beating yourself up about the best you coudl do at the time is pointless. What's more important is what are you going to do now.

littlegrebe · 11/07/2024 14:36

I did a lot of extracurricular music stuff as a teenager. There were a few kids in every group who didn't enjoy their instrument and were only there because their parents insisted and they were MISERABLE. I can't imagine any of them saw any benefit from it past a line on their UCAS forms. If you've avoided being that parent, good for you.

MrsBennetsPoorNerves · 11/07/2024 14:41

Here's the thing, OP. Your kids are their own independent people and not an extension of you. To some extent, they have to take responsibility for their own lives and outcomes.

They could have done incredibly well without any pushing from you - many kids do. And it isn't necessarily your fault if they chose not to push themselves.

Also, you have no means of knowing how things would have turned out if you had been pushier. You can't possibly know what that might have done to your relationship with your kids, their mental health etc.

It can be hard to work out where parental responsibility starts and stops and where individual responsibility kicks in. But there is no point in beating yourself up about stuff that you can no longer change.

If your kids want to turn things around for themselves, they will have that opportunity. But if they're old enough for you to be able to feel this level of regret, I'm guessing that they're at an age now where it is mainly up to them.

It's easy to say that you would do things differently with hindsight, but the reality is, you never get to see how that would have worked out in any case. If you made what you thought were the best decisions at the time, that's all you could have done. No point in wasting your energy on empty regrets. Channel that energy into supporting your kids as well as you can in the present instead, whatever stage of life they're now at.

Letsgetausername · 11/07/2024 14:55

It can't have been that bad that you didn't push them or surely you'd have done something about it at the time.

OriginalUsername2 · 11/07/2024 15:05

You did your best with what you knew at the time. That’s all we can aim for! We only know what we know. We don’t know what we don’t know until we come across it or are pointed in the right direction.

Allfur · 11/07/2024 15:07

So what would you have done differently? Sent them to 'better' schools?

Agapornis · 11/07/2024 15:08

And how do your children feel about you not doing those things?

Apparently my mum regrets not sending us to music lessons... but we didn't want to go to music lessons because it would have meant being in the same room as a horrible boy Grin

Education doesn't end after childhood - I do lots of courses because I enjoy learning new things, but for fun and for myself, rather than to please adults.

Kevinbaconsrealwife · 11/07/2024 15:10

You did your best with what you knew and had at the time……you show me a perfect parent and I’ll show you a liar !!!! Xx

MereDintofPandiculation · 11/07/2024 15:13

MontyTigger · 11/07/2024 12:22

Choices of schools
Pushing / encouraging focussing /excelling at specific activities/ music/ sports

I had a similar conversation with a friend (we both have DC in their 30s and 40s) She replied that she felt that the most important thing was to raise happy and contented adults.