I stood at a concert

[MangosteenSoda]

Went to a concert and had a seat to the side of the stage. In my experience, everyone stands when the act comes on. This didn’t happen universally, but probably around a quarter of the crowd started by standing. I was a little in front of most of the other ‘standers’ and sort of leaned on my seat a bit to minimise myself I suppose, but wanted to enjoy the songs and not sit.

A few songs in, a lady behind me tapped my arm and asked me to sit because her boyfriend/husband (sitting next to her) couldn’t see. I just said, ‘I’m sorry, but this is a concert’ and carried on standing. I’m pretty small and there were massive screens and a stage. I don’t think I blocked it all out.

A few songs later, the ‘very popular and famous’ song was performed and everyone stood up including the woman and her boyfriend. After that, most of the crowd continued standing and a bunch of people were dancing like windmills and nobody bothered them. The angry man and his girlfriend stormed out at this point.

I don’t have a particular aibu, but I felt that I was only asked to sit because I looked like an easy target to ask. It annoyed me that the woman had to ask for the guy and that it was put to me that I should sit because this guy’s preference was all important. I also felt sad for the woman because she was wearing the band T Shirt (so I assumed she was the fan) and this guy seemed to ruin her night with his moans and complaints while she just seemed to want to dance and enjoy the concert like everyone else.

So, should there be areas at concerts where everyone has to stay seated? I don’t think all the seating areas should be this way because they outnumber the floor and it would make for pretty sedentary concerts but maybe a compromise somewhere?

I don't know what venues you go to but the ones I go to have taken it very seriously. If a ticket is going to have a restricted view from the seat then the venue should disclose it and usually do. Nobody is trumping disabilities, if you buy a seat for a performance you expect to be able to see the performance from the seat unless advised restrictive view etc. regardless of disability, the disability only explains why the situation cannot be rectified. If staff laugh at a reasonable request then that adds to their liability in any legal action, so staff are wisely told not to.

I think it depends on what's going on around you. I'm not very tall so 80% of gigs I've been to I don't see a thing. I don't ask taller people to move out of my way so I can see. Hearing the music is more important to me than actually 'seeing' what's happening on stage. The atmosphere around helps the enjoyment of the gig - for me everyone sitting around me isn't very enjoyable so I prefer standing if possible. I have never been to a gig that is both standing and seated where no one in the seated area stood up for even part of the time.

I am considerate of other people however and would either offer to swap or sit if someone had asked me if I was seated. It would however probably ruin my experience as much as my standing would ruin theirs. It's not always possible to get standing tickets.

Wemble Stadium, for example, will not ask standing people to leave during a concert. You don’t have a leg to stand on - no pun intended. They meet their EA 2010 duties by providing accessible seating, quiet rooms, priority parking, step free access etc.

If the person had mentioned a disability I would actually have said, sure, I’ll sit down for now but when everyone stands then I’ll stand with them. The vast majority of 20k + people stood for more than two thirds of the show and I was one of around 25% of the crowd standing earlier because they were playing my favourite song.

The venue makes it clear that people will stand and under the current set up, I think that means that anyone who struggles with this probably needs to contact the venue in advance and try to get tickets that work best for them. Having seated only sections would obviously alleviate this and is what venues should do.

I’m probably going to mess up this link, but I’ve found a video of about halfway through the show where you can see that almost all of the people in the seats are standing

For what it’s worth, I have no reason to think the person behind me had a disability, but in the absence of them telling me, I wouldn’t know. It was a younger couple and the woman was standing dancing for part of the time they stayed and was encouraging the man to join in. He had, in the words of the Arctic Monkeys ‘a face on’ and I suspect he wanted to be watching the football rather than being at a concert.

YANBU at all!!

On the tickets in small print it always states ‘People Around You May Stand’ and whilst I fully appreciate that there are reasons why people aren’t able to stand, equally there are people that do want to stand!

I have been to hundreds and hundreds if not a thousand gigs and concerts (I’m 59 and have been going since I was 15) and my preference is to stand but sometimes they are all seated and standing tickets are not available. I always try to get a seat as near the front as possible to be amongst people who will be up on their feet but if I want to stand up and dance then I will - there are always the people who sit welded to their seat not even swaying or singing (why are they even there ?🤔) and looking po-faced

In America they never have standing tickets (in Vegas they allowed people in Seats 1 & 2 for the first few rows to stand at the barrier but this was controlled to the extreme!) so at a concert there I moved to the side - no problem and everyone was happy…..and moving even if not able to stand

Carry on enjoying yourself!

If you TOLD me to to sit down you'd get short shrift. If you ASKED me, I'd consider it.

YANBU
Seperate non standing areas does sound like a good idea.
I went to Pink a couple of weeks ago and the moment the opening bars of the first song started the whole bottom half of the stadium spontaneously stood. (No standing on the top tiers for safety reasons)

Poeple have a right to do whatever they want at a gig, including sitting and doing nothing being welded to their seats, I find it interesting people are being so judgemental of others but expecting everyone to accomodate their personal styles.

YABU to expect people tell you their disability (should disabled people have some tattoo on their forehead to make abled bodied people not have to ask?)- none of your concern. They asked you to sit down, you prioritised you having fun.
I feel sorry for them their experience got ruined.

Yeah you would think but my block were sat for the majority of it-except that one guy (I'm still pissed off about it 😆) maybe we all got up for the big numbers but rest of the time we were seated. I wouldn't have minded standing for most of it if we all were.

I don't have much luck with concerts. I remember being accused of being in the wrong seat once and she demanded to see my ticket (she was in the wrong block not me) and another time some women clearly pissed off that you have to walk by them to get to your seat and they had to move all the masses of food they'd bought. I wish I had a IDGAF attitude.

But it's okay if OP's experience was ruined @Tulipsareredvioletsarebue

If you have to stand up and dance throughout to be able to enjoy the show you should buy a standing ticket.

I get people want to stand up and dance in the seated section, but it does ruin the experience for people who can’t stand but are forced to just to be able to see anything, IMO you should always be aware of your surroundings and work with people so everyone gets the best out of it.

a lot of people at concerts are selfish pricks though and have no concept of crowd etiquette, or ever thinking about other people in the slightest.

If you have to stand up and dance throughout to be able to enjoy the show you should buy a standing ticket.

FFS RTFT.

Tell me you don't go to popular concerts and gigs without telling me you don't go to popular concerts and gigs.

I don’t expect anyone to tell me anything. Just that a lot of posters are implying that the guy was disabled and I’m saying I would only know that if he had told me. Also a lot of posters saying they ask people to sit down because they are disabled and if someone told me that then I would try to accommodate.

But once the 20k plus people are standing, then I think the time for asking individuals to sit is probably over.

And also, some disabled people need to stand. So now we're on a sticky wicket aren't we.

I always do standing or don’t go, but one of the only times I went to a ‘seated only’ gig at an outdoor place, the folding wooden seats were so close to each other and so close to the ones in the front that it was really awkward to stand and jiggle around.. we sat down because it was just impossible to enjoy, about 80% of the audience sat back down and stayed sat, we never saw any of it because the people directly in front of us stood up the whole time, it was the worst gig we ever went to, so I can empathise with people who can’t stand for long but still want to enjoy a show in the seated section.

I really only enjoy concerts where you can dance/ stand and sway along to the music . If I’m tired I sit for a bit and I don’t mind if i can’t see cos others are dancing/ standing.

Everyone has stood at all of the seated-area gigs I’ve been to in recent times. Can’t imagine going to see a lively act and being sat down the whole time (though I wouldn’t hate it personally…) Maybe a singer/songwriter ballad sort of act that would be more likely.

I think one of you is showing their character, and it isn’t OP.

Because I'm annoyed that people stand up and block my view when I've paid a lot of money? Seats are there for a reason.

I can't stand for long due to having 20 screws and 2 rods in my back.

So yes, standing in front of me does pee me off. Which I think in this instance is fair enough.

Tickets definitely DO say "people around you may stand"
I've had this on Disney on Ice tickets, other than fidgeting little children who are barely taller than the seats, I would hardly expect people dancing there 🤣

And, all this "people only stand because others are" is largely not true. The first song starts, or the first lively song, and the audience almost as one will stand. Not a couple stand and then it's like a Mexican Wave as people stand behind them each row to compensate

If you have such a preference to dance you really need to try and get standing tickets, that's what they're for.

Or maybe they should just open all the seats at the back of the stage that they usually don't sell for the people obsessed with dancing who don't think anyone needs to actually SEE an artist! Everybody wins.

It’s hard to get standing tickets, I’m disabled and couldn’t stand for a full concert but get up and join in when I can. Most people want to dances and move during a pop concert, I’d love to know the percentage of people who can’t stand up at all. I’d hate to have everyone sitting in front of me just because I can’t stand due to my back. So basically the majority would f people should stay at home if they want to dance to allow a small minority to see the concert?

@Harry12345 I have no issue with everyone standing for the big numbers. But if you intend to stand the ENTIRE time, every single song even the slow ones, then you're not even using your seat at all. It's a waste of a seat. Like PP have said, it depends on what everyone else is doing. Stand for the big numbers, that's fine, just not the whole show.

I mean might as well just stay outside and dance away if you're not bothered about seeing the singer/band. It'd be cheaper! Or go see them at a stadium, plenty of standing tickets there. But some people would like to actually see the artist they've paid £££ for. It's worse when you're in a good seat, if someone stands in front of you diagonally they'll likely block the stage and screens and you've paid hundreds to guarantee a good view...

I had this at a recent concert I went to with my sister. There was a couple behind us stood up for most of the concert but when they sat down they expected my sister to sit down also so kept complaining. Only trouble is, everyone else in front of us was standing so if she sat down, she couldn’t see. She even moved so they could see if she stood but they still complained. In the end she told the lady it was a concert, everybody else was standing up so she was staying up. They left not long after.