Heartbroken about DS's teacher

[Bluetie]

DS is a great kid. He's smart, funny, musical and sporty. He is also incredibly polite and has a caring nature. He is always winning awards at school, and is liked by all. DS attends a lovely small school with only 2 year-groups.

His previous teachers were OK but in year 3, he's had the most wonderful teacher, Mr T. Mr T is DS's first male teacher and they also share a hobby. Mr T has really helped DS develop his confidence, pushing him more in academics. DS has had a great year.

DS is now moving to year 4. Mr T is also moving to year 4. But they won't be together. All the classes have been mixed to mix abilities, sexes and SEN.

One morning this week, I went to ask Mr T if this class allocation was final. The head came to join our conversation, and he said he will only move DS for an exceptional reason. The head added that the new teacher has made the best progress in her year group across the whole school. I really want DS to stay with Mr T.

Can anyone think of something?

Me too, or that he or she had been in a serious road traffic accident or been diagnosed with cancer or something.

How about you draw a line under this hand wringing and see if you can think of a way to keep a connection between your child & Mr T, even if on a more limited basis?
Our school runs lunchtime clubs for like minded children, maybe the shared hobby might become the basis for Mr T assisting in the running of such a club (he'd need to be asked if he's amenable obviously). And as an added bonus other like minded children will hopefully come, widening your son's connections to his peers.
And if hobby doesn't lend itself to that, then maybe something else... Or a once a term hobby afternoon after school. Mr T might be happy to do something like this.

I’ve rarely read such a sense of entitlement. Your child is clever, sporty and does well. Be grateful for that. He is not at a disadvantage in any way, shape or form.

Be glad he’s had a positive year, be glad that he’s a child who makes progress, be glad that he’s in a school where they consider their staffing and placements carefully. There are plenty of people on here who would give their right arm to be able to say 5hrir child had an excellent educational experience this year.

By the way, not being able to spell doesn’t mean that someone is a poor teacher, although it would be beneficial for someone who finds it difficult to check.

I’m afraid you can’t have what you want just because you want it. The children are all entitled to the best the school can offer and that’s what they are trying to do.

Dear lord, let’s hope so.

That’s not generally how primary school works. Mostly children have a new teacher each year. It can be a bit of a lottery but that’s life. You have no particularly good reason. Let the school do its work.

I understand your disappointment but there is up to a decade of your DS's education left to go and this won't be the first time something like this happens. If you are too vocal your DS will start the school year with a negative mindset. I'd say your job now is to be as positive as possible about the new teacher and the new possibilities they could bring.

I am also a control freak who likes to have final say on my child’s education and believes that their childhood experiences will go on to shape their adult life. I wouldn’t be happy with sub-standard teaching for an entire year.

Which is why my children are home educated 😂

Sounds like they've purposely moved your child because you are obsessed with Mr T.

I thought this.

Who's more bothered about the new teacher? You or DS?

Genuinely, I hope you're not actually serious. This is some high-level MN preciousness.

Mr T sounds like an amazing teacher. Let him know what an impact he has had on your son but try and embrace this new teacher.

It’s just part of school life, moving teachers.

Grow up OP.🙄

I was going to suggest that Mr T might have made a special request!

Um. What?

My DS had an amazing teacher in yr 3, then at Easter it was announced she was leaving the school. Everyone was so upset.

But they got a replacement for a term and they turned out to be my son's second favourite ever. He said he was sad that the first one left but was glad as he wouldn't have had the other.

Changing teachers is life and exciting - maybe the new one is just as good. In our school they have other teachers in the year teaching all classes so he has one teacher for science then reading with his teacher then PE with another. Your ds will still see mr T, he may do an after school club he can attend.

Wonder if Mr T has asked not to have your DS because he and his mum are a bit too demanding and it would be in your DS' best interests to develop his resilience.

Fwiw, this year my child has had an amazing NQT who has the most enthusiasm, care and fresh ideas. She has been nothing short of brilliant. As was the very experienced teacher last year, and as will next year's teacher be, I'm sure. You and your son will survive and might even thrive, who knows - new teacher could be even better than Mr T.

Unfortunately at our school the headteacher was misogynistic so DH asked the next time and the request was considered.
Some (head)teachers have a thing against mothers

I would enquire into whether the teacher runs any clubs or might need a helper at break time once a week to keep up their lovely relationship.

Also, please please let the teacher know how much your child adores him and what a positive impact he has had, and try to avoid making him feel guilty about the changes. Great teachers like that need celebrating x

What a ridiculous comment. He's just not in that class. Tough shit. No kid can choose their teacher. They'll have teachers they love and teachers they're not so keen on. That's life.

Punished?

If the classes are being mixed then it's surely inevitable that your DC is one of the approx 50% of kids who were on Mr T's class for Y3 and won't be for Y4. So hardly being singled out.

I think it's good for kids to have different teachers, some they will like, some will "get them", some they won't or will have less of a connection with. In secondary they will have that multiple times a day with different subject teachers.

If the other class teacher has a good record of developing kids learning well then there really isn't any need for you to not want them to teach your DC. Mr T will still be in the school and likely still involved in the year group if they do things as a whole so your DC will still see him.

This thread is a wind up, right? 😬

You'd hope so but I have doubts.

So did I! I very much hope that OP has not been talking about any of this with her son. I will always remember standing in the playground with other parents waiting for the children to come out. We'd just been told which classes our children would be in the following year. I saw a little girl I knew, aged about 7 or 8, and asked her which class she was going to be in. 'I'm supposed to be in Mrs X's class', she said 'but Mummy says she's not a good enough teacher for me, so I'm moving to another school'. And so she did. They were an odd family. I often wonder how they turned out (all in their 30s now).

If Mr T has done a good job your child will be ready to move on and won't need him as a crutch....sooner or later he has to break away year 4 is old enough.

Schools tend not to accommodate requests to change teacher because it would open the floodgates and everyone would be asking all the time. Heartbroken is probably a bit extreme, I thought you were going to say a teacher had died.