To think they should let her take part?

[UndertheCedartree]

This has made me so angry/upset. So just looking for a reality check before I say anything.

My DD is in Y7. She has ASD and has struggled to settle in. Due to her anxiety and illness (she had Long COVID and since that is so prone to illness and post viral fatigue.) her attendance is low.

I had lots of problems with the HOY not wanting to make reasonable adjustments for her. Things were getting worse and worse. He stopped her going on a trip due to her ASD. She has felt so left out and very sad. Since I complained he's been out of the picture and things have improved.

Recently, we were asked to give permission for our DC to show families around at the open evening. I talked to my DD about it and she was quite anxious about it but after some thought was keen to do it. This is massive for her - she often finds it hard to join in. I spoke to her Learning Mentor and said I really think this could increase her self esteem and help her feel she was part of the school. She agreed.

Anyway, I heard nothing so chased it up with her Learning mentor. Apparently the HOY has said she can stay in the library with the SEN team and 'show people around the library'. DD is crushed. She's feeling left out once again. The knock on effect is it will now be harder to get her into school. I just don't understand why they would do this if they apparently want her attendance to be better and they want her happier at school? This would have had such a positive effect!

You spectacularly miss the point, well done.

IF adjustments were made ON DEMAND by the parent/ child, how do you think that would actually work?

They don't happen until they are requested?

Brilliant. You are the ridiculous and uninformed idiot.

I'm sorry, but do you have a SEN child? If so your experience with them has been very different to mine. We generally have to fight for everything!

well quite.

But the other poster who pretends thats' how it should be, adjustments only to happen when requested by the family, is stupid.

That would clear all the schools and every other set up for doing nothing, because "the parents had not asked them".

Adjustments shouldn't come from the family, because such requests shouldn't be needed to put plans into place and also because some families are completely unreasonable.

Great news OP

I never said 'adjustments only to happen when requested by the family'.
I said that pupils and their families have the right to request adjustments. I then gave the OP's example as not being a reasonable adjustment but a staff member excluding a child from participating in something that her peers are being allowed to participate in.
In a perfect world the adjustments would already exist but sometimes they come up as and when there is an issue. Families and schools need to work together to best support the child.
Thanks for calling me stupid though.

Well done for fighting for this OP! It was discrimination, and it was really worth you pushing back. Why does it have to be so hard?

Yes, I see your point.

I ask myself that almost every day!

Update My DD took families on tours around her school last night and I was told she did brilliantly! I'm so proud of her!

That’s brilliant! Thanks for updating and huge well done from me. She must be very proud and happy 😊

Wonderful! And well done for being such a fantastic mum!

Oh, that's so kind, thank you.

If the library is where the parents who want to know about SEN provision go, has it occurred to you that they have considered your DC in a capacity as an ambassador for that?

Remember. This is not about your DD. This is about "selling" the school to these parents. These are parents who may be extremely worried about their DD with SEN starting secondary. Meeting your DD may be extremely valuable to them.

Aw yay! Well done to your daughter and for you for advocating for her ❤️

I’ve just come across this thread. I’m so pleased for you and your DD that she got to do the tours and all went well. Good for you for sticking up for your DD.

No, they haven't. My DD was invited to show families around the school. The other DC were sent a letter confirming details. We had nothing until I chased it up twice. This was a last minute thing they made up.

Thanks, everyone.