Manager insisting I take lunch

[Shanna8]

Hi, I would really appreciate some advice. I am PA to the CEO of a large organisation. I work in a solo capacity, no team or colleagues to have lunch with. This suits me fine. Our canteen is very busy, noisy and full of fellow co-workers who lunch together every day e.g. Finance colleagues sit at one table, HR colleagues sit at another table etc. The CEO sits with other Executive members. It's a bit clicky tbh ... but not having someone to have lunch with does not bother me in the slightest. I take lunch in my office, which I prefer. I tend to eat while working as I'm very busy and would prefer to work through and get home at a reasonable time. My Manager (CEO) has raised this with me on 3 occasions in recent weeks i.e. you really need to start taking lunch, you should not be working while having lunch etc. Yesterday she made another comment and I now feel pressurised and upset. I have told her previously (jokingly) that I have an aversion to the canteen, that I cannot stand it! There are other "solo" workers who also take lunch in their office and yet they are not being targeted. I could approach one of these colleagues for company at lunch time but I don't want to do this. It will result in me being tied to this arrangement every day, having to go to lunch when I don't want to/have something urgent on. There is no-where else to go for lunch except my car. I feel upset and resentful that I will be forced to sit in my car every day when I would prefer to keep working. I am now wondering why my Manager is insisting on this? Is it a duty of care / HR issue? Is she fearful I will take sick leave and cite being over-worked with no breaks? Is there any solution? Should I talk to her? AIBU???

We tend to have unpaid lunch breaks so this is usually the reason for it. Do you work through and leave early? I used to manage a woman who did this and other staff complained a bit as they didn’t have that luxury in their roles. Is lunch hour set or can you go to the canteen earlier or later to miss the groups? Or maybe just to eat for a portion of your break then go back to it?

I think perhaps some posters who say you must take a break because of legal requirements don't necessarily appreciate the realities of working in a full-on office-based role. I'd rather work through lunch (while eating) than take along break and finish later. Time at home is more precious than free time in the office. I'd say that to your boss and that you'd actively prefer to keep going to get as much done so you can go home to your family. You are then showing her that you're taking an active choice to do what you're doing. Given the amount of extra hours you do anyway, it seems disingenuous for her to be so concerned about your work balance that you must spend time in the canteen away from your desk.

With that in mind, is this just about assuaging her conscience? Or has there been feedback that you're not mucking in? Or does she want you to be more integrated into the business because it reflects well on her?

Yeah but it’s the “feeding back” that makes it more than that. Did you “feedback” that Jenny and a wedding this weekend or that Bob had a birthday party? Feeding back work related stuff is, to me, snooping on colleagues. I’d be raging if a colleague fed back something I’d been privately venting about at lunch. It’s up to me to decide what gets fed back, not anyone else.

I can't see anywhere in the OP where the the manager has said she needs to go to the canteen and socialise. What she has said is that the OP needs to take a break, whether that be go for a walk, go for a drive etc. I really can't see how the OP is so upset by this.

No you can’t be forced to eat in the canteen area, but you also cant choose to have your lunch while working if it’s on works time just to get home earlier. If you work more than 6 hours legally you have to have a break.

I eat at my desk whilst working then go out for a walk on my break. Clears my head nicely for the rest of the day amd makes for a more productive afternoon!

You need to ask exactly what the problem is.

Are you munching away whilst your boss is trying work? Perhaps she has an aversion to people eating at their desks.....

You should take regular screen breaks for your eyesight, and a bit of fresh air and daylight at lunch time is really important.

When I was teaching, my room became the departmental lunch room , we were a long way from the staff room and my room had a sink and a kettle. One of my department used to bring the smelliest Pot Noodles in to use the kettle but I did ask her to take them elsewhere to eat them!

This. I’ve had this where I work. It’s not really fair if some are allowed to ‘work through’ lunch whilst others aren’t. I WFH mostly at the moment but would find it weird if my colleagues were working through lunch and leaving an hour before their scheduled time (I would know because we all sign off on Teams when we go).

@Pippa246 If you want privacy then don't mention things in your personal life at work.

And yes PAs/secretaries/middle managers will feed back to more senior managers that Jenny has got married this weekend, Bob had a birthday, Sam moved house, etc.

That's in France. In the UK it's a legal requirement to have a lunch break but no stipulation about it being away from your desk.

Seconding this. Taking a break is also known to improve work productivity as well.

Do you finish earlier, due to not having a lunch break? Is that what she has issue with?

Is the legal requirement for the employer to offer a lunch break rather than the individual taking one?

That to me is an even bigger problem.
If you can't complete your tasks in your contracted hours you either have too big a workload or you're not managing your time effectively.
In that context I would be ensuring that you take appropriate breaks as well .

Yeah but that's actually the opposite of the point I am making though.

@Hillarious states she was getting to know her colleagues but then telling her boss what they were saying about work. I'm quite happy to chat about my life outside work at lunch but if I was moaning about a work related issue, it is not up to my colleague to report that back to the boss and I'd feel that said colleague was snooping rather than getting to know me.

Do you not take lunch and then leave half hour early? If you do this might be why she doesn't like it? Either way you should be taking proper breaks you aren't being forever to go to the canteen you can go elsewhere if y out don't like it there and if you are so swamped that you work through your lunch plus evening and weekends then she needs to evaluate your role because either you aren't managing your workload or you have far too much to do!

Of course there’s a solution, just sit at your desk and eat your lunch, but don’t work during your legally mandated lunch break. Lock your PC and have a browse on social media while you eat your meal like everyone else.

She's not telling you to go to the canteen, she's telling you to stop working through your lunch break. Go for a walk!

Has the OP answered whether she cuts her working day short by 30mins or whatever to account for working through her lunchtime? If yes then that's the issue, if not then whether or not you claim to be 'fine' with eating at your desk as you continue to work your boss is on shaky ground if it does end up getting to you. Must everyone go for lunch at the same time? If not can you not take your lunch slightly earlier or later but not too late as to appear as though you've gone for lunch as it's approaching 5pm. Having said all that I cannot lunch with colleagues - it would be the end of me. I cannot tolerate it, I need peace.

I'd go for a walk round the block

You must take a break. But read a book at your desk. But you can't work I think longer than six hours. But eating at your desk while working is a bit yucky.

yabu
also check workplace handbook. at my office we are not allowed food at the desk.
but we have a kitchenette with a small seatin area.

It's most likely duty of care. Working through lunch and not taking meaningful breaks often contributes to poor mental health and burn out. And potentially they are being called out on you not being away from your desk.
If you don't want to sit in the canteen, why not take a walk listening to a podcast? Or sit and read a book/watch videos on your phone? It's important to take even one break during the day from work.