… to object to the funeral parlour unloading body bags at the end of my street?

[CoralQuoter]

There’s a row of shops at right angles to our street, where the back entrances face onto a small cut through road and the back alley between rows of houses. One of these shops is a funeral parlour, which has recently expanded. They now park two massive hearses in the shared alley, and frequently ask us to move our car so they can fit the hearse through the narrow road if we park there (it’s a public street and the only way we can access the back of our house) They also load and unload body bags (with bodies in!) from the back of the private ambulance in the public street, and my DD4 asks what’s in the bags, which is… not a fun chat? My DS11 hates it and won’t walk round the back as its “too creepy”. Not only this, but they leave bags of rubbish out on the street which the seagulls get into and encourage rats. I’ve tried complaining to the council, but they say the only thing they can do is “register my complaint” with the bin collection service. AIBU to think a small terrace shop isn’t the place to run a funeral parlour from, especially if there’s no room to privately unload body bags?

They should have a private courtyard. What you describe sounds undignified. Isnt there an industry standard code of practice/ethics?

After my neighbour died at home (he lived opposite), I saw him being moved out of his house and down to the road. He was in a body bag on a trolley. Then the operatives loaded the trolley into the hearse, which actually took a few attempts.

I don’t see how it could have been done differently. Even if a funeral directors’ premises might have rear vehicular access, most houses and flats won’t. So, any of us could see a deceased person being moved.

@CoralQuoter Bit confused

Were they unloading in the same space before they took over the extra building?

You make it sound like they're operating out of someone's residential house. If it's a row of shops it's fair game. I wouldn't like it but couldn't complain unless it was blocking my car or something on a daily basis. Rubbish and rats not really ok though.

It doesn't sound very pleasant as a whole but my main concern would be the rubbish bags , i would assume they contain clinical waste which need to be stored and collected within the correct legal protocol , if that's the case then totally unacceptable if they are being ripped apart , i would not want to see the contents!
Ask environmental health for advice.

If they can’t turn the hearses around either the space or the vehicles aren’t fit for purpose.
Do they have planning drawings for their application to expand. They would need to show there’s enough space for access, parking and manoeuvring vehicles. Relying on public parking spaces isn’t acceptable. Suggest you talk to the local planning department to see where you stand on this.

What happens if you’re not there and can’t move your car. I think I’d get really fed up with this after a while.

Yes but it's a one-off event. Not only is it unlikely to happen again, you could also... Not stare if you don't want to see it? You must have been watching for quite a while if you saw all their attempts.

Different from bodies constantly being unloaded at all times of the day and night, in the same place.

Thats not the point though. Here the OP is seeing it daily at the funeral directors end.

I was shocked to see a body being wheeled down the high street to a funeral parlour near me. The private ambulance parked up and then wheeled the body down the street. I thought they surely should park close by

Agree. Those of us using funeral parlours do not expect to see body bags. Imagine in a small town, thinking "oh, that might be Sandra in there".
Of course we know death is part of life, but we have conventions and rituals that help us or are expected of us.

I get your pain OP, I wouldn't want to see that either everyday where I would live.

As others have said photograph the behaviour and the rubbish and try and speak to them first. If nothing changes then escalate to the local authorities.

There is a difference between "understanding death is a part of life" and having it shoved down your throat every day. I am quite surprised at the number of posters who think you should put up with this.

I'd bet £100 these posters wouldn't like it either. They're just trying to appear cool and/or enjoy kicking the OP

Definitely complain about the rubbish I'm not sure you can do anything about the rest of it though

Did they not have to get any sort of permission before expanding? Are their clients aware of how they conduct their business?

I wouldn’t like it. I know death is a part of life but I wouldn’t want to be forced to think about it every day, which I would do if I had to see body bags on a regular basis like that. I don’t think my children would have liked it. It’s not the same as seeing the occasional coffin or something on the news. My youngest would probably have had nightmares about it, as he did over a variety of situations, some made up by other children and some in stories. I could handle the funeral parlour if it was more out of view.

What happens if you aren’t there to move your car or they don’t know who a car belongs to? It doesn’t sound like a very practical premises for this business.

Oh my gosh that’s horrific

I think the funeral parlour need to organise themselves better.
I agree with steppemums suggestions.
The expansion does not sound well thought out.
As long as you have a right to park your car where you do then I would not move it.
I’d look at it exactly the same as I would if a neighbour bought too big a car. It’s not my problem and I won’t be inconvenienced by it.

I’d not move my car… I mean once every now and again is acceptable, but continuously I wouldn’t. Don’t answer the door, or tell them you’ve had a couple of drinks, or you can’t find your keys. I’m sorry for the deceased and families, but sounds like the parlour has outgrown its premises and needs to move and that’s not your fault.

definitely complain about the rubbish - keep that up. Photos and email the right department at the council every time.

How do your neighbours feel? Would they join you in being a bit more awkward?

I disagree with the posts saying the body bags are fine as death is a part of life. Yes it is, my kids know about death, have been to funerals, we have a funeral parlour nearby and they know what it is.

But I think that's a bit different to having to watch bags containing dead bodies constantly being unloaded at the back of your house! That's enough to give kids nightmares. It doesn't sound like the premises is suitable.

I agree it doesn't seem suitable.

the body bags is not something you can reasonably complain about imo. It’s a natural part of life and so long as the bodies are properly transported not a risk to anyone. The hearse parking is annoying - I’d just refuse to move your vehicle and say ‘I live here, it’s inconvenient to move and if you can’t run a business from the property without inconveniencing residents you should not be running it.’ Given what goes on in a funeral home I’d make a complaint about the rubbish in writing to the owners. Presumably human and chemical waste needs professionally disposing and any other rubbish should again not be disposed in a way that inconveniences residents.

But that is not for OP to decide! Honestly do you think there is an option where funeral parlours can accept bodies only in the circumstances where no one might see them unloaded. Also, I doubt it is constant. Most funeral homes are not taking more than a couple of bodies a day, if that.

I assume the funeral parlour was there before you lived there. So apart from the rubbish YABU.

Yanbu I would not be happy either op. I wouldn’t want to see bodies in bags.
the bins thing is bothering me, am I being naive here? What’s in the bins… ?

I was actually surprised it was an option not to be ok with it! Reading your post, it occurred to me that it depends where you are maybe? I live in central london but was from an even more dense city before this, and I feel like few small businesses have the benefit of private grounds/private generously sized carpark.