AIBU to “steal” this?

[AmiABadPersonn]

Hello everyone I just want your opinions on this as today I’ve been in a heated argument with my friend as to wether I am unreasonable or not.

I am off work on maternity leave so the funds are tight at minute. There is a man who lives near me I believe he is drug user, he sells half price stuff and also takes orders on what you want for half price. He knocks on my house about 1 or 2 times a week with a bag of half price goods. I always buy washing detergent and softeners from him because you can get a whole weeks laundry of the nice brands for around £10. Money is tight as I have just had a baby and I have 2 other children with my husband also. i also sometimes get baby milk formula from him if I’m running low because it’s cheap.

I feel like this is not wrong because if I didn’t buy it other people would. Even if no one bought it he would steal it anyway in hopes someone would buy it eventually.

Today my friend was at my house when he came so I offered her to have a look what he had. She immediately asked him where he got this stuff from and he replied “shop”. She didn’t say much after but when I finished buying my items she started shouting about how I’m funding his drugs addiction and I shouldn’t support it because I am now stealing too. I told her to relax it’s fine it’s only a couple of items. She didn’t say much and finished her coffee and left quick.

So am I morally wrong for this? Or would you do the same?

I wouldn't buy baby milk from him, aren't you scared it's tampered with?

I guess in your world drug dealers and hit men are fine as they are just offering a service too?

What the supermarkets pay their works has absolutely nothing to do with the OP buying stolen goods. The NHS underpays its staff too, can we go steal from a hospital?

The OP can afford to eat if she's spending money on crap like scent balls.

The friend isn't "judgemental AF". She is just a decent law-abiding citizen who doesn't encourage criminal drug addicts to her door. Shame more people aren't like her.

This thread has been an eye opener, so many excuses for criminal conduct.

Sorry you're incapable of extrapolating from the information provided.

Sorry you felt the need to post a catty comment.

If the OP was not wasting money on mindless shit like scent balls and branded washing powder, she'd have more money for food, wouldn't she? Cannot believe the number of people who think this scummy behaviour is justifiable.

There's nothing to extrapolate. A mother who is wasting money on fabric conditioner and scent balls is not struggling to feed her children. If she were struggling to feed them she wouldn't be wasting money on such useless products. The OP just wants to live a life she can't afford.

Yes you are wrong and immoral and very clearly if no one bought from him, he wouldn't steal to sell. It might take a bit of time but he would stop if there was no market.

And honestly buying stuff in this situation because you like the branded laundry goods is fucking reprehensible. You are supporting a thief and a drug dealer.

I feel for your kids having such a shite role model and I say that as someone who couldn't even afford basic appliances when I had a baby, let alone branded goods.

Off topic of the op being scummy, why is it "only a male" im pretty sure there are lots of males who do their own shopping and washing without thinking a tenner a week Is good .
Stupidity is genderless

I wouldn’t know myself, but my dh definitely would.

Oh this stupid argument again!

Who do you think pays for the losses? The supermarket?

Of course it bloody doesn't! The prices are hiked up to cover theft so it is ALWAYS the customer who pays

He is a thieving junkie and you're buying stolen goods.

You can try and justify it but I'm sorry, it's indefensible in my book.

They absolutely do work out their prices based on costs AND LOSSES

I buy a large box of own brand biological washing powder for about £4 & it lasts our family over a month. I've bought fancy stuff over the eyars and this basics brand is as good as anything I've used, no plastic & does a great job.

You are subsidising this guys drug habit and knowlingly supporting criminal activity. You are free to do so.

But if you think you are getting bargains you are wrong.

Whatever your circumstances, please buy cheaper laundry stuff (mine lasts months and doesn’t need to be the posh stuff) and use the money on baby formula from reputable places. You don’t know that it is fresh supermarket stolen or bought in bulk from someone selling it from abroad etc. You won’t know about recalls and I wouldn’t risk it for baby formula

I’m with your friend. I couldn’t be friends with someone that supported this.

Going without Laundry scent boosters and stain remover won’t cause you any great pain. Your children won’t starve because they don’t smell of Parisian muffins or whatever.

You are teaching your dc that it’s ok to steal.

This. I’m trying to get my head around what’s so fantastic about these laundry balls that it’s worth maintaining contact with / inviting into your home a known drug addict and thief. Especially when there are small children about. I have a job which enables me not to rely on local criminals for household items, yet all I have in my utility room is a box of store-brand bio powder and a box of store-brand non-bio powder. Am I missing out big time on the scent balls? They are clearly worth endangering my safety and the safety of children to get a hold of…🤨

Sometimes I look at parents and their bad habits and wonder how on earth schools expect kids to be good people when they have bad parents as role models.
What an example.

I don't get why you keep having another baby if you can't buy the items for the price they are. Maternity leave is tough on us all. But I'd rather it be tough that my kids thinking this behaviour is OK....you say its only a few items but imagine if we all said that

It's not really based on costs plus a bit though (although that would be the lowest they could go), it's based on price and sales, they want to charge the price at the right level to maximise the sales to create the highest profit, once they've reached this level they can't then add a bit extra to cover thefts. Fuel is highly competitive and by the time it reaches the supermarkets the margins are pretty low, this is why it seems to follow the wholesale price more closely.

They don't though! They just wouldn't charge less than that amount.

You are trying desperately to justify your dishonesty.

Are you bringing up your children to think that they mustn't burgle the house of a poor person but it’s OK for them to burgle the house of a rich person? That you wouldn't care if they stole the bike of a kid whose parents had enough money to buy them another one? That would use exactly the same logic as you’re using.

Stealing or knowingly buying stolen goods is dishonest wherever the goods were stolen from. If you don’t care about that it’s up to you, but don’t try to deny it.

You probably wouldn’t be buying laundry balls and fabric softener if you were on your arse.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-66819837

I absolutely wouldn’t I was living in a homeless hostel and a guy was doing this I never bought a single thing off him, I am not a theif nor would I encourage one to keep doing it. You are putting yourself and your family at huge risk by having this man come to your house what if one week he’s desperate and decides to take from you too? You say it’s okay because it’s a big shop but the prices rise to account for this so honest people suffer. If you are struggling that much look into what help is available to you so you can get what you need honestly. For washing stuff shop about sometimes home bargains or farmfoods are cheaper than other places, the pink stuff stain remover is fab and cheap.

So let’s imagine that shoplifting doubled overnight. Are you saying you don’t think shops would raise their prices to cover the loss of income?

a big corporation shop like them won’t miss it.

They don't just take the hit though. The financial loss from theft is passed back through higher prices for the rest of us.

yeah but scent balls????

Supermarkets don’t have huge profit margins. And I hate to break it to everyone…those who sit on the board of executives aren’t going to be taking the hit on this, no matter how much you think that they will. It’s the prices for the general public which rise.