AIBU to “steal” this?

[AmiABadPersonn]

Hello everyone I just want your opinions on this as today I’ve been in a heated argument with my friend as to wether I am unreasonable or not.

I am off work on maternity leave so the funds are tight at minute. There is a man who lives near me I believe he is drug user, he sells half price stuff and also takes orders on what you want for half price. He knocks on my house about 1 or 2 times a week with a bag of half price goods. I always buy washing detergent and softeners from him because you can get a whole weeks laundry of the nice brands for around £10. Money is tight as I have just had a baby and I have 2 other children with my husband also. i also sometimes get baby milk formula from him if I’m running low because it’s cheap.

I feel like this is not wrong because if I didn’t buy it other people would. Even if no one bought it he would steal it anyway in hopes someone would buy it eventually.

Today my friend was at my house when he came so I offered her to have a look what he had. She immediately asked him where he got this stuff from and he replied “shop”. She didn’t say much after but when I finished buying my items she started shouting about how I’m funding his drugs addiction and I shouldn’t support it because I am now stealing too. I told her to relax it’s fine it’s only a couple of items. She didn’t say much and finished her coffee and left quick.

So am I morally wrong for this? Or would you do the same?

I can imagine doing this in your situation, but I don't think it's wise or morally right.

Do you really need to ask? Have you not seen the brazen impunity with which some people are walking into shops and walking out with stuff the haven’t paid for? How do you think the shopkeeper feels? But yeah you getting your name brands at half price is soooo worth someone else of being out of pocket.

I think unless you’ve been in the situation you find yourself in, it’s very easy to judge. I’d do exactly the same as you.

The simplest thing is to consider how you would feel to come home to find your house raided; broken outside door and all your kitchen items taken as well as half your clothes, and a mess left behind for you to to clean up after ages spent with the police reporting the incident and weeks of debate with insurers to prove the loss and get half the value back. You buy some new stuff. Then imagine it happens again 2 weeks later. Shopkeepers are actually humans too, and you can lay bets he's breaking into small shops because the alarm systems are easier. Your payments are causing him to create that distress. Contact your local police by calling 101 and let them deal with him.

Of course you shouldn’t buy stolen goods and of course you shouldn’t spend £10 a week on laundry products!

I’ve got a vision of some sort of Lenor and Fabreze trading market where all the “druggies” meet now 😆

Stop kidding yourself that he would steal whether people purchases it or not. He will be stealing according to demand.

Money would be a lot less tight if you weren't spending £10 a week on laundry.

But it’s not desperate times calling for desperate measures. It’s someone wanting to spend loads of money on branded unnecessary laundry products (laundry balls???) that they could buy for a fraction of the price they currently spend by just buying own brand and ditching the laundry balls and fabric softener (which you don’t need and DEFINITELY shouldn’t be using on a new born baby’s clothes). If she did that she could afford more baby milk and food.

The £10 a week is on laundry pods, softener , stain remover and laundry scent balls from persil or lenor.

If you are genuinely struggling for money right now you don't need laundry pods, get powder (or even liquid is cheaper). Fabric softener - fine I'm assuming as you're on mat leave you have a baby but again get the "pure" stuff from lidl/aldi it will last ages. Stain remover- you don't need this EVERY week? And if you were really strapped for cash it wouldn't be a consideration. I know the scent balls you mean and yes it smells nice but actually they are really strong and everyone knows when you've used them. You don't need them for kids and if you're genuinely hard up for money you don't need them at all!!

@LlamaTwirl was correct though. That's how capitalism works (for the few!)

OP, they mostly do this to look inside people's houses while you're choosing and case them out as potential burglary sites

You’re not on the bones of your arse if you’re buying laundry balls. If you’re on the bones of your arse a pointless scent ball to add to laundry is the first thing to go, even before the likes of cutting Netflix. She can still afford food, she’s just choosing to buy stolen laundry balls to buy more food.

Taking the supermarkets out of the equation, you are feeding his drug habit OP. How are you going to feel when he’s arrested and that you’ve been part of the cycle for him? Or if he ends up dead because of his addiction? Are you going to be happy that you got some cheap (and fucking pointless) laundry balls from him then? Other people might still buy from him but you don’t need to be part of the problem. I’m not sure I could walk past his house in a few years with my children on the way to the park, see an ambulance outside and know it’s because his addiction has got the better of him and I’m partly to blame so my clothes can have an artificial scent to them. If you are struggling to afford baby milk, talk to your HV they can give you support on where to get baby formula without feeding someone’s addiction. Near us there are several baby banks that give out formula for free to people who need it. I know the HV can also give you vouchers.

You don’t need sent balls or fabric conditioner. They’re both really bad for children’s skin and I definitley wouldn’t use them on baby clothes.

Problem is that buying his stolen goods makes it more expensive for everyone else as they raise the price.

Laundry products are the most stolen items in our store, huge market for them. In my time I have been threatened with dirty needles, had my windows egged, threatened to be stabbed, spat at etc. My partners been physically assaulted twice punched in the face kicked strangled all by shoplifters.

The CEO doesn’t miss it because they don’t take it out of their pockets, they take it straight from the customer by putting the prices up. Were all paying for shoplifting 🙄

however I wouldn’t judge you for this if I knew you in real life.

Just because he didn't beat anyone up whilst stealing from the shop doesn't mean the shop workers didn't find it a horrible experience. Jeeze just ask your friends for money instead to buy those things.

Stop trying to justify it. You know it's stolen goods. Therefore this in itself is a a crime.

£10 a week on laundry stuff? Bonkers.
Scent things are totally unnecessary. We've never used softener. We use powder as you can tweak the dose. Huge box lasts months.

Budget. Look at what's really necessary. Cut your cloth accordingly. Ask for help through legal means if you have to

agreed. There is also a ton of chemicals from those products that I would not have my children around, let alone, allow them to wear and sleep in products covered in chemical scents. Go by some basic laundry soap and stain remover (or just use dish soap or vinegar and baking soda for stain remover). And stop stealing and supporting crime.

You're no better than him just because you are paying someone else to commit the crime for you. I would have some sympathy if you were skint and buying formula out of desperation, but not buying fucking scent balls. If I were your friend I'd be judging hard and stepping back from the friendship.

I’m pretty sure buying stolen goods is a crime …

Your justifications are bizarre OP...your friend clearly has higher morals than you do 🤷‍♀️

Why not cut out the middle man and just steal what you want yourself 🤷‍♀️ saves you money and you can choose what you want. You can rationalise anything.

I think there is another issue here. The price of goods we buy includes the cost of things stolen. Therefore if nothing was stolen, OK cloud cuckoo land, the prices would be lower for everyone. Perhaps think again about your choices.

theft from a shop....no ones being abused you are deluded.

So why not save yourself even more money and steal it directly yourself from the shop?