Can I foster with a 1 bed flat?

[Iloveicecream1]

I'd love to foster a child. Currently I own a one-bed flat with a large communal garden area.
I live alone and can't afford to just buy a two-bed place/pay a mortgage alone.
There's no guarantee I'll ever meet someone to have my own children with, and fostering has always been something that appeals to me.

I'd sleep in the lounge and give my bedroom to the child.

The thing is, your post about how it’s “sad” that things are restricted to couples/the well off comes across as centred your own wishes.

Nobody who was looking at things through a lens of what’s best for a child would seriously suggest fostering in a one-bedroom property.

It is sad. Some women would love to be mothers, whether that's through having their own child, adopting or fostering, but it just doesn't always happen. Some things are just easier in couples.

Not at all - you can be renting or in council house / housing association and still foster.

Ownership is not the important factor. The safety, security and positive support is what's important. That includes not putting already traumatised kids into inappropriate / not ideal situations like overcrowded homes.

This.

Why not enquire op? Worse happens is that they say no.

Although you’ve name-changed, op, I recognise you from your earlier thread. IIRC you didn’t seem to like the idea of going it alone as a parent because you didn’t feel you would have enough support/resources. Surely that would also be true, in fact more so, if you were a foster parent, as the children you would have placed with you would often have had trauma in their lives, and be exhibiting challenging behaviour? I imagine you would need a good support network to be able to cope and do your best by them. I’m not talking about a partner, necessarily, but the same sort of support network that would make life easier for any single parent.

With all due respect OP, fostering and adoption aren’t really the default for women who haven’t met a partner. I’m sorry you aren’t where you want to be yet in life but children who need a home and family come from trauma- it really isn’t about your wants but their needs. They deserve the best chance in life and that does mean stability and space- on top of the qualities of the parent which I’m sure you have.

I sit on fostering panels and one of the very few musts for a carer is that they have a spare room. The carer also needs to have a bedroom. We have had carers apply and move to suitable accommodation in order to be approved.

A family member looked into fostering as a single person and was basically told she would be unable to keep her job. You are essentially being paid to be a foster parent to be on call for whatever is necessary, not use childcare during work hours etc. This isn't feasible for most people. Instead she looked at becoming registered for respite care. I don't know the ins and outs but the idea was to offer weekend care to children with such high needs that the parents needed a break every now and again. Having one bedroom and a pull out sofa bed in the living room for you might work? Could be something to look into.

Respite care could be something to look into.

It might be the case you still need two bedrooms, I can't remember what the family said the criteria was, it could be the same as becoming a regular foster carer but I do think it's worth asking the question.

There isnt much call for respite care for babies, which is what you would be limited to.

This is why you wouldn’t make be a foster carer. Fostering is not just about being a mother. It’s also not based on being a couple. You need to do some research. You sound a little naive if I’m being honest.

We have many single carers. It's hard on your own though. You need a very robust support system as a single carer.

You are centering yourself in the world of Fostering, this pov is as far removed from what a Foster child needs.

You can always apply op and I think you should, purely because the rejection will do you some good and perhaps open your eyes to what Foster carers should be.

Fostering to be a mother is absolutely the wrong attitude to go into it with - in many cases the goal of fostering is reunification or adopting.

How old are you? I would start looking into what you would need to do in order to afford to be a single mother via an official route (a.k.a sperm donor at legit clinic). Including changing jobs - retraining if needed, moving to a cheaper area, etc. Not sure how old you are but there may still be time to do all this.

Wrong!! I spoke to someone about Fostering and not having a spare room an the woman pointed out babies under 12months can have a cot in your room.

This sounds more about your want for a child, or to take care of a child. Than what is actually best for a child. A child that is very much in need, and has had their whole world upended most likely.

if you really want to foster. Could you move
to a two bed?

Maybe a newborn for a very short period of time (until they should go into a cot in their own room) but generally no!

The chances of getting a newborn just for a few months is very very slim.

I doubt you'd be approved in the first place without a second bedroom!

Things are set up in the best interests of the child and personal space, for both of you, is one of the major things taken in to consideration

But a couple wouldn’t be allowed to foster in a one-bed property either.

Lots of single people foster. But, like couples, they need a bedroom for the child which doesn’t require anyone to sleep in the living room. There are good reasons for that.

The purpose of fostering is not to provide children to women who would love to be mothers. Fostering is about the needs of the child, and part of that is providing them with a place to stay where is enough room for everyone to have a private place to sleep and where there are clear boundaries between what is a communal space like a living room and what is a private space like a bedroom. Think about the sorts of situations a fostered child might have been removed from, and I’m sure you can see why it’s not in the best interests of the child to be placed in a house where an adult (who is initially a stranger to them and with whom the child doesn’t see as family) beds down in the living room.

What about day respite care for children with additional needs? This can be a regular placement so you could have a real bond with them. It’s such woeful service and it’s really distressing to see young kids out at SEN sessions with carers who don’t interact or give a shit because it’s basically agency work for them.

Also I’m sorry you’re getting a hard time - it’s a lovely thing to want to do.

There is a huge range of motivations for fostering and OP is not alone in wanting to care and provide a family environment.

Many of our foster carers have specific interests or motivations, many like to be very long arm, so they are really suited for kids that just cant bond with another family, cant get attached. But some foster carers will only take young people who are going to be 'part of the family' and be cared for, want to be looked after and mothered (not all do or can manage that), so those carers will choose children whose profile is like that

In OPs case, until she has a bigger property she will be limited to babies only and as others have said, this is the job, you cant work as well, you'll be very busy.

But there is quite a lot of black and white thinking on here about what fostering is or isnt, people come to it from all perspectives. It is a job at the end of the day

OP, i'm assuming that you are the same person on the other thread about being fed up of being single who also mentioned that they would like to foster? If so, foster children are not just there for you to come home to and alleviate your loneliness. That's what cats are for.