Stalker house buyers

[Lozgal24]

Slightly exaggerated title 😂

We are selling our house and the family buying it are buying their first house in the UK. I’m starting to feel a little irritated as on an average evening they walk past our house and look I the windows approximately 5-6 times. It’s really invasive. They don’t come right up to the windows but the street is only 1-2 m from the windows and they do a really slow walk past. It drives our dog nuts who barks repeatedly as they are close and essentially staring in the living room and squinting past the gauze blind. They sometimes wave- probably twice a night. This happens 5 ish nights a week. They are not en route to anywhere. We have another two months till completion.

They have four kids, they also walk past approx 2-3 time an eve between 7-10, separate to their parents and slow walk past. They openly stare. They are from a different culture so I’m not sure of this is the norm where they are from? It seems odd by anyones standards.

AIBU to think this in invasive? Just ask to view it again? We’ve offered but it’s getting silly now.

Would you say something and risk sale or just deal with it?

Yes, this could be a cultural thing. Where are they from?

When I was visiting Denmark, my British host pointed out that a cultural difference is Danes often leave their curtains open as they are proud of their houses, and standing in the street to look in is seem as a compliment, not intrusive.

I mentioned this to my Danish friend in the UK and she said "yes, why are you British always hiding away behind curtains? It's weird."

If you do mention it to the Estate Agent, maybe suggest they explain it's not part of UK culture, rather than just telling them not to.

Although, on the other hand, they're not doing any harm. I'd probably just put up with it tbh.

At least they seem committed to the sale!

If they’re definitely buying, do nothing. It will all be over soon. Do not leave contact details though. All communication strictly through the agents.

Maybe they're from a culture which encourages evening walks? They're obviously excited about moving but that doesn't mean you have to engage with them. I always pull the curtains shut / pull down the blind when using rooms at the front of the house in the evenings, as our windows are close to the street and I don't want to be bothered by passers by looking in.

Close the curtains?

I have to confess when we bought our current home I drove past regularly to look at it - we had a very delayed exchange to completion and I was just excited and dying to move in!

I wouldn't let it bother me but it obviously bothers you, could you just close the curtains or blinds or ignore them?
I would just put up with it, the sale is nearly completed, why rock the boat.
They're obviously excited about their new home, it's kind of sweet (in a stalkery way 😉)
I sold my house & moved around the corner and sometimes walk my ddog past my old house to have a nosy at the new owners improvements, it's set back from the road tho but I come back on the other side of the road to get a better view (really hoping now that they haven't seen me 😄)

When my offer was accepted for the house I currently own I was so excited about both the house and the area that it was in. I used to visit as much as I could. It was a way of getting g used to the area which I had fallen in love with but didn’t know very well. I couldn’t wait to move in and explored the cafes, shops and other facilities.

i didn’t look through the windows however or anything like that so i feel for you.

(I still love my house. It is a lovely home in a great area. I was so lucky to find it so my excitement was justified. It has almost tripled in value since I bought it)

I'd send a message via the estate agent that its triggering your dog and can they please dial it back.

Honestly, I think you need to have a frank conversation with them. “I know you’re excited, but it’s getting really intrusive and weird. It’s a stressful time and we have a lot to do. Can you maybe limit it to a couple of times a week please?”

Do not give them your new address or number. You could be beseiged with questions after you have left.

This is not acceptable and they are boundary crossing. If you have two months until completion, it does sound like you have not even exchanged contracts yet? That means either party can pull out and watch out for it being them. It does seem like they are looking for any problems at all which would make me uneasy.

We were going to buy a house years ago and had agreed completion for the end August. We had a keen buyer. Sellers then rang me asking for more money, we refused. I realised they were struggling to finance their onward purchase. They then said they could not complete as agreed, but we could store some stuff in their garage (as if).

We went ahead with our sale and went to rented.. A week later they asked us to call round, showed us an earlier survey, whilst holding their hand over part of it. Not only this, we now had a tenancy contract which we had to honour for a few months. We realised they were seriously odd when he started calling round hammering on our door. We pulled out. If it feels odd and off, it really is.

A house down my road sold last year after the elderly mum died. The 50 odd year old (never left home) son has been hiking up the massive hill and staring into his old house 3 or 4 times a month! It weirds me out and its not even my house

Aw that's so sad.

If you want to say something using the dog is a gentler way to do it. Say your dog is getting distressed several times a night and therefore they need to stop doing it for his or her sake. Better than anything aggressive, just for the sake of the sale.

Omg 😲 that's crazy behaviour 😳

We've had this when we lived on a very quiet and peaceful common, so not a lot we could do about it.

I found it quite off-putting and invasive.

I didn't acknowledge them too much because I didn't want to encourage them.

The woman's very pushy elderly father hung around once and kept pressurising me to let him in to have a look around with out an EAgents appointment.

We stopped the sale in the end, because they stupidly kept on knocking us down little by little almost on a weekly basis.

Silly them, they really missed out. The setting was beautiful and properties there were like hen's teeth.

Honestly I think that they're just excited. Cultures from warmer climates do tend to go for evening walks. Think I'd say nothing, so that it all goes through without problems, it's just 8 more weeks.

yes but standing outside the house waving????

Just deal with it. Not worth losing the sale over and just try to get completion ASAP!

It's excitement. They live just round the corner and they can't resist going to look at the house they will soon own. The children are telling their friends proudly 'Look, we'll soon be living there'. I can imagine how annoyng it is for you but try and see it from their pov.

Depending on how and why they came to be here, your house could represent their ultimate aspiration. They may have worked and saved for years to buy it and they may be beside themselves with hope and pride and nervous excitement about being in a position to put down permanent roots. I used to do some voluntary work among asylum seekers and have an inkling of how tough the first few years can be for many. The B+Bs, the awful rental conditions and then, with a lot of hard work some manage to make it to a home of their own, and achieve the stability of being a homeowner. Not saying your buyers are from that background, just trying to point out that your house may not be just a house to them.

Deeply annoying behaviour, I'm sure. I'd just avoid the front garden and the front room in the evenings for a few weeks till it's all over and not reward them by going out to say hello. This is not for ever.

I'd just ignore for 2 months - not worth rocking the boat with buyers. Move your dog to the back of the house and I'd be focusing on moving admin, decluttering, packing and planning next house things.

@Lozgal24 perhaps they are being confused by the scottish system where you can exchange and complete within a few days. we have actually managed to do it on the same day at least twice. I actually do not understand why the english system takes so long to complete after exchanging!

I've known people exchange and complete on the same day in the English system, but you need a reliable solicitor.

This would stress me out a lot. I’d have to say soemthing, but I agree privacy film as it won’t jeapordise the sale

It doesn't have to. The "standard" is a week between, but you can do it same day, or even a few days between, as long as everyone in the chain agrees.

Eight weeks would be unusually long, but it's usually because there's a new build in the chain and someone has had to exchange on that a lot earlier than usual.