To think there’s nothing wrong with toddlers on leads?

[shhquietplease]

I’m not a parent so maybe I just don’t get it’s

But isn’t it the best of both worlds? Your child gets freedom walk and you can make sure they are safe.

Maybe not needed if you only have one child and they can have your full attention.

I don’t get the “I’m not treating my child like an animal” comments either.

I don’t understand. Keeping your DC safe is 100% child focused rather than taking an unnecessary risk - no one knows whether their DC is going to suddenly run off - it’s not something you can ever predict - children don’t behave consistently.

I'm not against them per se, but haven't actually ever felt like I needed to use them. And unfortunately near me the only time I ever see them being used is in places like playgrounds/fields where I just don't see why they are necessary and the child can't explore.

I taught my DD1 to walk to heel. Let her get to the end of the reins and then would ask her to walk with me. She still does walk beside me now - I thought I was very clever, then I had DD2...

Our eldest we used reins (backpack style with a lead) regularly in town, he absolutely hated holding hands!

Youngest is much better at holding hands and we live in a much less busy town now so we haven't needed them there, but did use them on mountain hikes to keep him on the trail and safe. We still use a climbing harness and rope now he's bigger (4) when we're up high, only takes a second of us being distracted and he could be in a dangerous situation so seems sensible

It depends how they are used. I hate it when a parent yanks a child to change direction rather than speaking to them. I had a late walker with terrible balance and used them so I could catch her when she fell before her face hit the ground again.

Not at that stage yet, but no problem with using them and very unbothered by whether they're called leads or reins. Let's be honest, it's absolutely a child lead.

I genuinely don't know why parents wouldn't use reins. There's been loads of cases of young toddlers and kids going missing, or running out in front of traffic etc.

Why on earth risk it? I genuinely don't get why people wouldn't use them on young children who want to walk but lack coordination.

I always feel so sad when I read these threads. I think of poor MrsPresley, a poster on MN whose child was run over and killed when his dad didn't put the reins on.
My boys were both bolters. Road sense and distance awareness doesn't develop until they are about 7. On reins is better than under a car. It is uncomfortable for a small child to walk holding hands with an adult for any legth of time. If you have to pull them you risk dislocating their elbow.

A big difference,suggesting that a parent uses a lead is rude ,disrespectful and judgmental is my personal opinion.Your opinion is fine if that’s what you think.

If they’re the same thing then they’re the same thing. I was wondering if there was an actual difference. If I were using them for my toddler I wouldn’t care if they were called leads instead, I don’t think it’s a rude word.

Only used them with my youngest, my older ones didn't need them by oh my God the youngest had 0 risk awareness and he never walked he bolted and was afraid of nothing.
There's no chance I would've let him walk without them he was just a mad man.
Once he calmed down when a bit older we took them off, that's that.
Don't give a shit what anyone thought of them.

Traditional reins clipped on at both sides, so looked like a horse's reins.

The single option when they were a bit bigger was usually called a wrist strap I think.

The more modern ones that attach to a backpack just clip in one place, so look more like a lead. I think most people still call them reins though, because they're doing the same job.

@marmaladeandpeanutbutter I don't agree that they aren't child focussed and don't really understand what you mean by this in a normal
Life.A child with reins on the school run can potter along unfettered by the pushchair , can keep their balance with two free arms, can communicate properly with hands and arms free and can be safe . The alternative is often the stroller or sling with no freedom but admittedly closeness with mother and safety and security.Both scenarios are child friendly.

You can keep your children safe without putting them on a lead.

Hold hands
Hands on the pram
In pushchair if necessary.

They have much more freedom to explore safely with reins rather than stuck holding hands or in the buggy.

@marmaladeandpeanutbutter mone would never hold hands, I tried my best and he just wouldn't.

I used reins with dc1, he had no sense of staying close, wouldn’t hold my hand and it was needed until he was old enough to listen when I said stop etc and could trust that he would.
He is now a very sensible, careful and cautious (but not overly so) 6 year old

dc2, we haven’t needed to use them. I kept them from dc1 as they were a god send with dc1, but he is a very different personality. Will only go so far away from me before heading back, and very happy to walk nicely next to me holding my hand the entire time.

I think people who oppose the use of reins must have a dc with a personality more like my dc2.
I don’t judge people using them at all, why wouldn’t you do whatever was necessary to keep your child safe whilst letting them grow and explore.

Perhaps if the toddler that ended up in the middle of the road two foot from the front of my bumper had been wearing reins....

Thankfully got a sixth sense and was going a lot slower than normal. The speed other drivers drive along there would have done for her.

No issue with them at all, in fact they're really handy.

Were you expecting to start a row with the word 'leads' OP, and that's why you didn't bother coming back? 🤣😂

That. After reading her posts I don't see how anyone could disagree with them
It takes a second for them to yank their hand out of yours and they're in the road

I did use a lead at least once when I forgot his backpack strap, kept it in the car. He was safe, I was happy and he only barked once at the passersby. Very civilised. He was convinced the dog was his brother so it was all good... long as he didn't lift his leg at lampposts I didn't mind.

I had a backpack one for my kids. Didn’t like the wrist version as they could undo them! To be fair they probably got that from me. I apparently unclipped mine aged 2 and ran out of M&S towards the big Christmas tree in the shopping centre and grandparents didn’t notice 🤣🤣🤣

My older DB (now 56) would just sit on the pavement and refuse to budge if our mum tried to put reins on him. But then, he always was an awkward little shit. 😅

Yes I remember reading this as mine was first learning to walk. I had the reins delivered the next day.

He only wore them for about a year, but early days they were very necessary as he would refuse to hold hands and was always wanting to wander into the road to stomp in puddles etc.

Also good for preventing him hitting the pavement hard when he took a tumble.

He used to bring them to us when he wanted to go for a walk!