Ageism.

[WhatsUpNowThen]

It's awful, on Mumsnet. Do these posters think they will never be 60?

I have to admit that I'm not too pleased about it. But turning 60 does not change my views on anything at all. I think the same things as I did when I was 30 Why do the younger generation hate us so much?

I'm on their side.

Dearie me, Vestibule made a very funny observation, which, as a clearly almost dead and probably demented 60 year old living in a mansion and block voting tory whilst clogging up shops at the weekends made me laugh a lot.

I have noticed that younger people find it hard to laugh at themselves. Probably too busy taking selfies and having their eyebrows done*
*sarcasm for the youngsters

I love being 64.
I still work full-time in a demanding job, have grown up dc who still seek advice about work and relationships, I have a freedom I have never had previously, despite being mindful of my 88 year old mother's needs (who by the way can still play a cracking hand of bridge).

😀

Read through my posts again.

As a fully competent 63 year old zI would like to know what it is you have to guide her on?

You are determined to take offence, I didn’t mean it like that, they don’t view me or DH or Grandparents with contempt but in an everyday situation they would be self aware walking past a load of teenagers in the sense of what they are dressed in, what they look like. They are also plugged into their headphones to and from school so I don’t think they notice much. I was the same as a teenager, it is not that outlandish to suggest that teenagers don’t really think if people 20 plus (not famous people) as setting trends, people in their 20s can be their teachers remember and appear very out of touch with ‘young’ people. I felt the same when I was younger.

My DS really likes Ed Davey and said if he was old enough he’d probably vote for Lib Dems but it wouldn’t care what Ed Davey thought of his clothes or music, teenagers thinking they set trends is hardly a new phenomenon!

Exactly! I'm 66 and can't imagine having to be guided!!

I really don’t need to 🫶

Shame because you really do have the wrong end of the stick
But, the OP agreed with my first reply, as have others.
Do you always jump to such conclusions and judgements?

My Mum is not even in her 60s, she is in her 70s and she feels there is lots of contempt for teenagers like her Grandson and told me a tale about being on a train where two teenage boys quickly stood up for an older woman with a walking stick, despite them doing it without asking, she was muttering about them not being helpful and Amun felt sorry for them as they didn’t do anything that was not helpful. Maybe it is because I have teenagers so I am more aware of it but they definitely experience ageism and they are just existing like any other member of the public; for example, when I met him at lunchtime to pop into a small supermarket, the security guard ushered us in to skip the queue of sixth formers waiting to buy lunch. How many people in their sixties have to queue up outside a shop as they are lumped into one big category as potential thieves, absolutely outrageous!

Look - if you weren’t making fun of other generations why do what you did? If I wrote a similar post but about boomer tropes I’m sure I would be told I was ageist, and rightfully so.

You’re just being silly now to be honest. Others have agreed with me, so saying the OP agreed with you doesn’t really mean anything does it? Perhaps it’s a generational difference.

IMO ageism to the younger generations is often laughed off or not seen as bad, but if it’s done to the older generations it’s seen as nasty and called out. I think your little post highlighted that - fine if you don’t think so, but you can’t dictate how others feel or respond to your post.

Perhaps you should make your intent clearer next time.

🤐

Errr what's ageist about vestal's post? She's pointing out how the younger generation think about us oldies.....although I'm still a young'un in my dreams!

I dislike the posts where children are convinced their parent is demented, when in fact it's very clear their parent has capacity, and it's obvious that the adult child(ren) just want to control finances....occasionally there have been genuine concerns, but most of the time it's pretty unpalatable, but I don't think it's ageist in the true sense just more abusive.
I also dislike it when age is used as a negative descriptor, if someone is being a dick it's not because they're old, it's because they're a dick! Tbf you often see teenagers getting a hard time on here, again it's not their ages that make them dicks, it's because they are dicks! The young'uns I work with are awesome!

What's that saying 'every generation thinks the one before or after is wrong'? 😁

Oh I see puddles you're saying vestal's post is sort of reversed ageism, sort of youngisim?
Nah, she's just using satire! She clearly doesn't really think the 30 somethings can no longer converse in person! Don't take it to heart. She's more poking fun at society in general!

"Every generation; Blames the one before ....." 🎵🎶🎵

I think much of the ageism on here is more sweeping generalisations about different generations.

We have a diverse age profile in my team at work. We laugh about the differences, especially in music tastes and knowledge of 1970s TV. The office would lose something if we couldn't. But that's completely different to me shouting someone down in a meeting, and suggesting they know nowt cos they're young.

It's just knowing where the line is. And everyone's line is different. Which makes the debate ...... interesting 😊

It’s not reverse ageism - it’s just ageism. Ageism is stereotyping or discrimination based on age (it’s not just referring to older people being stereotyped / discriminated against by younger people).

Listen, you can say it was satire or whatever you want but I’ve seen it so many times on mumsnet where people are so casually ageist to younger generations and then get a bee in their bonnet when it’s called out. Ageism against older generations gets quickly called out. There’s no way it wouldn’t have been if it was about older gen’s. I’m just calling it how I see it, you can disagree if you want to but it won’t change my mind on this matter.

I'm not taking offence at all.
My idea of a decent society is one where people of all ages mix with each other and where they regard every one as an individual. Lumping people together on basis of age is not healthy. How can people understand and learn from other people's view points and experiences if they only mix with people of their own generation? I'm not just talking about your teenagers being unaware of anyone older than themselves. I'm talking also about older people only mixing with people of their generation. I'm talking about the " othering" effect - which is a very real thing.
So I'm not taking offence. I'm generally sad about the unpleasant society we live in and ageism is just one of the things wrong with it.

I think the problem is young people seem to think older people had a much more cushy life when they were young than they have now, when most of us went through really tough times when we were young and we actually do know and sympathise with young people now going through the same sort of things, no money, rubbish job, not able to get on the property ladder, not able to afford the things we want, or to start a family, we mostly came from poor families and got no inheritances either, etc, etc, things don't change that much. As you get older hopefully things improve slowly you get promotions at work, your income goes up, you scrimp and save to buy that tiny house in a terrible area, which you trade up years later, and if you're lucky you get a half decent pension having worked 40 odd years.

If you think MN is ageist, try reading the Guardian. I'm amazed Polly Toynbee still has a job.

Thank you! I was begining to think I was going potty. Altho' there are times when I am (house keys in dishwasher, anyone?!)
You are so right about each generation thinking every other is/was wrong. C'est la vie!
I

All true! Except the last bit. They won't be doing maths in their heads when they're 60 because they've never done it. And they'll probably still want to be looking at their phones while they walk but tripping over on dodgy pavements will teach them not to!

A few examples:

She was gloating that a celebrity on X was DMing her, so I had to make her aware it was a scam account.

She asks for guidance every time she comes to visit as to what she should wear eg should she bring a jacket, instead of checking the weather forecast. I live a couple of hours further south.

She’s had a few rants on social media about kids not giving up her seat for her on buses because she sees herself as ‘elderly’ (at 64) and they should show respect. I had to remind her that she doesn’t look elderly (very young for her age) so no one is going to offer a seat to someone who doesn’t look vulnerable. Kids don’t need to give up seats for healthy adults.

She criticised me for having kids and then going back to work, because she didn’t work when I was little. So I had to explain to her how much a mortgage is nowadays and how silly it was to want me to suddenly fuck my job security after her emphasis on me getting qualifications.

Also get a lot of ‘in my day we wouldn’t have done that or my mum wouldn’t do this’ so I have to explain that times change and previous ways were not always the right way.

But as I said, I know this is an issue with my mum’s individual personailty and not reflective of everyone the same age.

It was perfectly normal when I grew up in the north in the 60's and 70's

I've noticed that older people seem to find it very hard to distinguish between broad generalisations and personal attacks on them as individuals. E.g., stating that older people are more likely to have voted for the tories or brexit isn't a suggestion that you personally did but is factually true of the generation.

I've also noticed that ageism is only ageism if directed at older people, contempt and disrespect of younger people and their views is just stating home truths apparently.

Someone up thread stated stated that the young are learning their contemptuous attitude from somewhere and I'd suggest looking in a mirror.

But as I said, I know this is an issue with my mum’s individual personailty and not reflective of everyone the same age.

I'm glad you said this because I don't recognise any of those traits in me or any of my friends, many of whom are older than me (65).