I live in an awful area, there was a shooting today and can't get out!

[NoCoco]

I live in S E London and it really is an awful area. I can't get out and feel trapped.
I'm in a low paid job, single mum. The house I live in is owned by a family member who very kindly let's me live here for free, they are very wealthy and the house was left to them by a family member.
I'm so grateful but I would love to move to a safer area. There was a shooting here at the end of my road today. I'm so worried about my kids and am a nervous wreck. I can't afford to privately rent, no chance of a mortgage and council lists are crazy.
I just feel so trapped. Does anyone else hate where they live?

Whereabouts was the shooting today in SE please? (Roughly) I can't find it online.

Sorry to disappoint but it's grim up north as well. This in an area that used to be decent 10 years ago but now crime rate is through the roof. DD too scared to walk to school or get the bus, it's that bad. Dickheads in balaclavas and druggies everywhere.

I feel for you op. I’m also stuck in a shit area, less to do with money and more to do with literally everything else - probably stuck here for the next 10-12 years. It’s not London but somewhere that some pretty horrific things have happened and in the papers a lot. I’m dreading my children becoming teenagers around here but can’t see anything changing.

My god, I'm so sorry these awful things have happened to you.

I live in another major city and it's violent and dangerous here too, so just going to another city won't fix it as I'm afraid these problems exist up and down the country. I was just talking about all the issues here with my teenage ds, I would love to move but the safer areas are a lot more expensive, I'm a single mum and can't afford it so looks like we will have to stay here and put up with it!

You live in the same area as me I was there today when the shooting happened.

Also hearing of kids stabbing each other in what would be quite middle class areas and upmarket villages. This violent culture of posing with knives and pretending to be a gangster is all over social media, and therefore it's everywhere

Sounds like it's not just London. I wouldn't even know where to move to but I'm assuming similar crimes are happening in other areas up and down the country. Its depressing isn't it!
I feel sad that it's got so bad in this area, it wasn't always like this

I wish my kids could have my teenage 90s experience of going to raves and having the best time, I never knew anyone who was stabbed or carried a knife

It’s a good time to start demanding more of our local and national politicians when it comes to this

@Julieann418 thank god no one was hurt but they easily could have been if they are driving around shooting each other!

It's not grim everywhere "up north" though. I've lived in Cumbria for 25 years and I don't know anyone who's ever had a crime committed against them. Our crime rate is very low.

@floppybit I can't stop comparing the 90s and my teenage years to now and wish my kids had the freedom I did.

What is it that stopping you getting a full-time job. Do you have little children?

David Cameron said 5 years for carrying a knife and that certainly hasn't happened, but it does make you worry about the future of your children especially when a political party that is more right is running the country and yet crime is still ubiquitous. You must be so concerned but have no useful advice as its hard to get anywhere on min wage as a single person.

Yes, me too, I'm exactly the same

We moved to Northumberland no way did we want to bring our kids up in the drug fuelled streets where we were. Still social housing,lovely town,countryside and many happy kids. We discussed would we ever move back to a city and both said no way here to stay now

I’ve lived in SW London all my life ( I’m 61 ) it’s always had pretty bad crime statistics ( it was really bad in the 80’s, loads more muggings ) we just cross our fingers and hope for the best. A lot of the crime is gang related, but of course you could get caught in the crossfire.

We thought about moving to a quiet little village somewhere but I’d probably get stabbed in the woods by some psycho.
We’re staying in London.
sorry op you’re feeling this way. I totally understand.

I've had something pretty awful happen to me which I won't go into detail about, but the teenager who did it was dressed all in black and wearing a balaclava. It was caught on camera very clearly, but the the police basically said there's absolutely nothing they can do as the attacker had a balaclava on and can't be identified. You can have all the security cameras and doorbell cameras you want but the footage means nothing if the person is wearing a balaclava, they can literally go around doing whatever the fuck they want.

Of course the maths are mathing. Minimum wage is just 11.44 an hour. For a normal working week that comes in at about £1600 a month. There may not be rent but there’s still council tax, fuel, travel, possibly childcare BUT the op says her hours aren’t regular so it’s very unlikely she’s clearing very much at all.

was anyone hurt? where was the shooting?

If you get your relative to throw you out then claim housing benefit and move elsewhere? It's way cheaper up north. You aren't trapped but it will require major change

If you aren't on universal credit you might be able to save.

I do get it. I live somewhere crap. The local drug dealers never used the guns they had stashed away though, just the knives. I'm going to get a lodger when the kids move out and start saving hard so I can leave.

I used to live where you live now. I saw all about the shooting on social media.
I moved a few years ago to Ireland.
I had no family here, but I applied for a few jobs online, got a cheap flight and went to the interview and got a job!
I then moved, rented a tiny cottage in the middle of nowhere and I'm still here.
It was hard, I think I cried for the first year but my children are in a little village school, there's not much crime, no shootings and although I miss London I think I miss it from the 1990s when I was young not what it is now. Its hard but you can move, will take alot of planning and will be difficult but its possible.

I am sorry for your situation OP.
Im a going to suggest a job with a house or flat that comes with the job. It will probably be housekeeper or suchlike. Are you experienced in that sort of work? There are many roles advertised in The Lady. Most never get filled. My BFF did this when she left her husband. She had no experience just good home skills. You usually need to drive and like animals. The country does have crime but it's low. You could also try the national trust and The Richmond Fellowship.