To take my daughter out of this nursery?

[Miloandfreddy]

My little girl has just turned two. She attends nursery two and a half days a week, is very happy there and the staff are great. The problem is that in the past 3 weeks she has been bitten 8 times by the same child. So I've had to sign 8 incident reports, once was three times in the one day. Each time it has left a visible mark. I was happy to let it go the first couple of times but now it seems I'm just dropping her off every day to get bit. I've spoke to the staff and they are always so apologetic. My husband wants to take her out, but I don't want her having to start again with new staff/friends etc..

Would it be possible to switch days to avoid this child. Or does the nursery have different rooms, could your child be moved to a different class

As them what is their plan to stop your daughter being bitten?
it’s a relatively common problem at nursery
the biter is usually biting tom frustration and often lack of language.
the nursery should have someone to shadow biter and distract/move when warning signs of biting occur.
Being apologetic is fine and all. I would be asking for an appointment for them to explain what is their plan to stop the biting. This child is likely biting others too.

8 times? Absolutely unacceptable.

They need a risk assessment in place for this child's biting.

It's understandable some toddlers bite. It's not acceptable that nursery are not managing it.

I'd have a meeting and if no solutions are shared I'd be giving notice and I would be clear as to why.

I’d be making way more of a fuss first. What are they doing to stop this happening? Sorry doesn’t get you anything, I’d want an action plan.

That is appalling. It should not you being forced to pull your DC out of nursery. The nursery need to tackle the issues dealing with the biter. What are they doing ? What steps have they put in place ? Once or twice but 8 times is totally not acceptable.

I was gutted when my DC was bit 3 times never mind 8!!!

That is totally unacceptable.

What have they said their plans are?

I kicked a fuss after the third time and he was never bitten again.

I'd be asking for a meeting.

I am not normally a person that complains but that is a lot of bites. It's common in small frustrated children so staff should be really closely monitoring that child and intervening as frustrations rise. They can't be doing that.

I would ask the manager or room leader to explain in detail how they are keeping your child safe. I would summarize this by email later. If it doesn't sound like there is a plan keep asking.

Sorry, this is really rubbish
Have they said to you why they think this child is biting yours, and are they biting others?
My youngest dd used to get bitten a lot by 1 specific boy. Turned out she was trying to play with him and getting close to him and he didn't like it, but he had delayed verbal skills and couldn't tell her to 'go away'. So we did some role play practising giving him space and things improved a lot. The nursery needs to try to find the cause and let you know what the plan is to try to improve things, including if you can do anything to support.

Make a massive fuss and tell them you will inform Ofsted because their lack of supervision and care is not working.

Ask what provisions they can put in place to stop this happening.

So I've asked them is it just my daughter that is being bitten by the child in question and the answer is no. There are several children being bitten by the same child. They have explained that the problem is it happens so quickly they don't have a chance to intervene.

Again, kick up a fuss, because that’s obviously not good enough at all.

This, the biter needs to heavily monitored to avoid these situations. I'm sure other parents feel the same and nursery staff are more than aware so adjustments need to be made. X

I would ask for a meeting . Tell them you want to know what they are going to do to safeguard your child …

biters are usually a phase and my concern would be moving she would encounter the same situation at another setting … however the need to be having a plan in place to protect your child ..

That said when I was a childminder , I had a baby bit on the first day sat on my lap - child walked up and bit baby no provocation involved , no warning … it’s hard to manage sometimes

Can’t you bandy together with the other parents and address the nursery en masse?

Not good enough.

The child needs 1-2-1, shadowed throughout the day.

Not good enough at all. I would ask nursery manager what is being done to safeguard your child from repeatedly being bitten. Follow it up in an email too so you have a paper trail.

Then they need to stop taking their eye off the biter.

The response form nursery isn't good enough. Mine are 9yr out of day care and even then there was a bite action plan.

Absolutely take her out. I know small children bite but EIGHT TIMES in 3 weeks when she's only there half the time is ridiculous. If she'd fallen and banged her head hard enough to leave a mark 8 times in the same time period you'd have her out of there pretty fast!

Nurseries are short-staffed as it is.
Thet don’t have the resources to put in 1-1 staff shadowing the biter all day.

It's possible that this child has additional needs. If this is the case the nursery can then access additional funding to support with staffing to this child can be supervised better. At 2 years old they are on a 1 adult to 4 child ratio, so would be very difficult for them to supervise the biting child on a 1 to 1 basis, unless they access additional funding.

The second time my child was bitten, I would be demanding an action plan. The third time, I would be complaining to everywhere I could. If it happened a fourth time, I would conclude that they cannot be trusted to keep my child safe and would have to pull them out.

This. There just isn't the staff.

Only if the parents agree to it. And some parents are in denial which then means their child doesn't get the help they desperately need, which then impacts on the staff and other children.