To not give builders food

[ThiswillDoItsfine]

Help me settle this difference of opinion. I have a company coming out in 3 weeks time to install a lot of fencing. I mentioned to dh that I will get them coffee, tea, and biscuits/cookies in to have with drinks. Dh is saying just the drinks is fine, and for me to just offer it as and when. The job is going to take 2 days. I want to give the men something to eat as well, at the very least.
DH is then saying he doesn't want them trailing through the house, which I do understand. However, I was going to set a table outside with a flask, tea bags, coffee, milk & sugar, and bowl of biscuits so that they could help themselves. I thought this would be less restricting and mean that they can get it when they want, without waiting for me to ask. I also think it saves me running around when i have a child to look after. DH is saying that this is well over the top.

Is this okay? Or is it wrong i set this up outside for them? It is an outdoor job, so I thought it would be easier all around, and they'll be working hard.

Thank you.

I wouldn't offer them a thing to be honest. Not in this day and age.

A man wouldn't do that, put out food for builders.

It's buying into that whole I'm a woman so I'm a servant of men and must accommodate their needs. That's just my opinion.

They can drive their van around to the shop.
If they want to use your loo that's ok but it ends there.
They won't be expecting anything and they'll have brought their own food.

If they were a bunch of friends doing a job that's fine but you are paying them for a service.
They'll be charging you an arm and a bloody leg.

Exactly, it is my nature, I have to offer drink and biscuits at least. I find putting the snacks out is easier, as some say no to be polite. I find some workmen bring their own, as they don't know if they'll be offered anything or not, and have their own preferences on what they eat/drink. I always do drinks and biscuits though.

I need to ask as well is there such a thing as biscuit etiquette? 😂
Dh is saying we have to get branded, or it looks cheap? I actually buy in and prefer the mister biscuits/Mars bars/their twix version etc from lidl, It is what we have in for the dcs. We just like the taste of them better. Do I need to get branded?

Honestly dh is confusing me no end atm! He doesn't want to do snacks now he will, but it has to be brands, wtaf 😩 He still maintains they aren't needed, but if we do , than brands.

""they can get it when they want, without waiting for me to ask."

But they aren't waiting for you to ask.

Some builders say no, not to be polite, but because it's more professional not to get involved in taking tea and biscuits from your client.

Because relationships can be sour later on. That's why they refuse.

When they come in and do a shite job and then you feel like you know them and can't say 'oi here Jimmy you can't leave that like that!'

Jesus, I won't show dh your comment on the poonami toilet, it'll add fuel! That's grim, how ignorant of him.
I was just going to put a sweetex dispenser out? If they're too fussy they need to bring their own I suppose. I like the idea of the disposable cups because the poor men last time were so scared they would drop the mugs, they're better for outdoors, and saves me washing up!

My husband does that. Sorry I should have said when I said I pop out, I meant we do, I thought it went without saying. Of course my husband offers them a coffee, he’s not some throw back, and he will also offer a biscuit.

it’s nothing to do with our gender, give over. It’s basic manners.

I wouldn't think a drink and a biscuit would make me feel like I know them tbh. I don't chat and stay out of the way!

You don't need to supply any food or drink. They can get their own, and presumably they take a lunchbreak? But if you want to set that stuff up for them that's fine. Nice gesture but it's not necessary. You're not a cafe, you're their employer/client. They won't expect anything from you and will be too busy working hopefully to drink and eat much outside of their break.
You should obviously offer water in abundance if they don't have their own though.

How’s it more professional to not have a cup of tea. And how possibly can you feel like you know them as you provided tea. Don’t be daft.

Tbh a packet of digestives would do, but there's nothing wrong with providing drinks and snacks

I always offer but have found recently (maybe since Covid) that most refuse. I almost feel offended as this is my only role.

Polite to offer but maybe Covid made it OK to refuse - especially when increased fees means tradespeople earn decent money and can make their own choices and don't have to rely on the largesse of those that employ them. It's not like they will go hungry and thirsty otherwise. They will definitely need the loo though. So maybe offering a loo is more important.

Tea, coffee & biscuits is hardly 'food' - it's basic hospitality to provide these to visitors to your property.

I get these op for small outside jobs. They are good as you can hold them without burning your hands.

https://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B0BJQB49PR/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_search_asin_title?ie=UTF8&th=1

Yeah. What do you think they will do that no one else does?

Normally the workmen will order rolls etc or have a cooked breakfast at the cafe . At the cafe near us a new estate was being built. A steady stream of hungry workers helped fill the coffers. I wouldn’t have minded them using my toilet, but as I said, some aren’t very particular in their aim when using the loo, and some don’t wash their hands. I’m not putting up with that!

Same here. Though my DH has told me stories of doing work and not being able to use the toilet. I can't believe people can be that shitty to someone who's doing a really good job for you 🤷

Op you're having 2 days worth of fencing done . This is not a big job so don't overthink. A cup of tea and a biscuit outside is all that is required and itd be a no for using the loo too from me after previous bad experiences involving massive skids and unopened windows 🤢.

You don't need branded. As long as they don't taste like sawdust you're fine.

I can’t believe the majority of clients practically offer a menu of food and drinks! They must have plenty of time on their hands to cater like that, not to mention the cost ! Most workmen bring their own food, or use a nearby cafe, if lucky. Biscuits and a tea or coffee is all that’s necessary to offer.

Just get something like a big pack of 2-finger kit-kats for branded stuff and fine for the rest to be own brand. Crisps should probably be branded though, imo, whatever comes in a big multi-pack.

Shitty is the word! Piss on the floor, toilet seat not wiped, no hand washing, stinking. I don’t want that! Luckily, a nice little cafe was only 100 yards away.

Yes, I found that when we had an extension built, they refused as we live near cafes, coffee shops and a sandwich/baguette shop and they seemed to want to buy their own stuff. They are pretty loaded these days so probably don’t want a biscuit if they can have a pastry or deli style sandwich. I was relieved as my DC were young at the time and I was busy with them. Now, I wouldn’t really have time as I am WFH and really busy.

I’d not be leaving a flask out though, for some reason I think once it’s been opened once,and used, the water will cool.

oersonally we just make them fresh , it’s hardly onerous.

I always offer drinks and biscuit type fare, my dad was a service engineer many moons ago and he always used to come home and moan about the 'tight' people that didn't offer him a drink especially in the heat of the summer, he had to ask for water on many occasion, it wasn't the done thing back then to carry your own bottled water around, have always remembered my thirsty dad so naturally I always offer a drink of some sort at the very least.

I just say: 'here's the kettle help yourself'. I'm not making tea for them. Biscuits - yea if you like. If I do make a cup for myself I offer.
They need access to the toilet - unless your DH wants them weeing in the garden (I've seen the neighbours' workers do this). They are NOT going in a bottle in the van! Disgusting - why would he expect that? Treat them like the human beings they are. Treat them like animals and you may not like the quality of their work.