KIT days aren't an advantage if you don't have free childcare?

[DreamyNavyMentor]

I've got 9.5 days KIT but no childcare so pointless me doing it. Little one can get the 15 hours in September but childcare is £210 per week (full time).

I earn £31k a year so £2k take home.

Aibu that kit days arent beneficial for single mums or those without help?

Thats a good idea!

I've already started him in nursery so he gets used to it/I can see the nursery in action. They don't offer advice days though, so I could increase to full days

Adhoc*

well obviously everything is harder if you don't have childcare, but presumably you factored this in when you decided to have a child? I specifically asked my parents about helping with childcare and moved round the corner from them the year before we had kids, for this exact reason.

KIT days are not mandatory - you do them if you want to and can and don't if you don't want to or can't.

With my first child I did around 7 KIT days. All booked in at the end of my mat leave and I did them on days I'd already booked DS into nursery as part of his settling in sessions. You'll often need baby to do several nursery sessions before you officially go back to work in order for them to settle in (usually offered in increasing hourly increments by providers so baby gradually stays longer). So, childcare was already needed regardless and I figured I'd pop along to work for an hour or so and get a full days pay! Useful as it was during the end period when you get no money at all.

Didn't do any with second DS as had a short maternity leave so never dropped much pay anyway and wanted to maximise time with the baby.

And you tell me what other options there are for mothers to return to work. Settling in days and than full time time childcare is very abrupt for the child imo. I also think it's very abrupt for a mother to have to return to work after having a child and still caring for that child.

This is all information you should be armed with and have sorted when you proceed with a pregnancy and have a child. Welcome to parenthood, you have 12/13 years of juggling holidays, sick days and everything else that comes with it.
What do you think should happen? I'm confused by the its abrupt for a mother to return to work part. It's not is it? You've known about your return to work since you went on maternity leave.

I think the key part here is:

KIT days can be advantageous to lots of people for different reasons.
KIT days can be useless/less useful/difficult to others, particularly if childcare is difficult.

Crucially, no one is forcing you to do KIT days and absolutely no one will judge someone for doing or not doing KIT days. Just do whatever suits you and your family.

Yes I wanted to do KIT days desperately, but nobody could/would look after my baby.

"Settling in days and than full time time childcare is very abrupt for the child imo."

OK... but you have your child in nursery already @DreamyNavyMentor , so there isn't an abrupt change...???

YANBU. I didn’t use my full 10 KIT days for this reason. I got 6 months full pay on Mat leave and then went onto statutory. Because of this I couldn’t starting taking KIT days until month 7 and I started my phased return at 9 months (went back full time so ended my maternity leave but used annual leave to make it a phased return). So that essentially meant 10 KIT days over 3 months - not quite 1 a week but near enough. My phased return started at 2 days a week. I had a lovely boss who kept telling me to use them as I’d get paid for them and it would help top up the mat pay etc. I was also going back to a new job due to promotion and I think they wanted me to start getting my feet under the table. No family nearby and husband worked full time in a job that required him to book most of his leave for the year ahead at the start of his leave year, and he’d taken a lot already to add onto his paternity leave. It just wasn’t doable. I did 4 I think out of the 10, DH managed to take leave for 1 of them, my mum came to stay for one and my MIL for another. I think I tried to do the other with baby in the background and instantly regretted it, and that made my decision not to do any more and not to stress myself out over fitting them in.

Full pay! Amazing

It is to have the child in full time

This is like pulling teeth!!

So your child is currently in... one day a week, or something? And you go back to work in September? and you would like to work, say, two days a week in August by using KIT days? But the nursery can't accommodate going from the current level to a higher level between now and september, but will be able to go to 5 days a week in september?

Is that... anything like right??

Your contribution is welcome but please calm down.

I have no fixed arrangements and still thinking about it.

Unless there is something you really want to go to then don't bother. And can baby's father take a days annual leave to watch him

I had a couple of KIT sessions (didn't go in for the whole day) while my son was having a settling in session at nursery.
You don't have to do them, do you? Not doing so should have no negative impact on you work wise.
They can be useful for those who are able to arrange them.

Things are harder if you are a single parent. Things are harder if you don't have support when raising your family. This is just how it is. You work place does not have to make accommodations for you.

^^ As a single parent for many years, I completely agree with you.

I would add, the sooner you take the single parent chip off your shoulder OP the better. People will soon get v tired of hearing you whine about being hard done by and employers are not obliged to make special allowances for you. Now’s the time to get your back up plans into place on a practical basis; it can be v stressful balancing baby, nursery and employer on a good day, let alone when temperatures, sniffles and tummy bugs come along.

Well a nursery worker won't be a stranger obviously.

Ok dokey. Byeeee!

Nursery doesn't offer ad hoc days

Oh Hun, I'm sorry that you feel that way.

No chip this way, maybe you are projecting?

I was simply asking a question to which I've received responses that are helpful - like phased return and tax benefits.

You don't have to do them but the company does offer them. So they offer, I can agree.

Work wise I have a lovely employer, family friendly.

Donor child ;)

From your thread on 05 June “I do find parenting hard because it wasn't part of my life plan. It's happening though and he is a lovely baby who generally doesn't cry or is fussy. So I feel bad when he does :(“

So you didn’t plan to have a child, but used a sperm donor?

Yes. It was something that as a 41 year old I hadn't planned for in my twenties and thirties.