Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Carole Middleton's sacrifices for Kate during childhood?

125 replies

Alittlebitofchaos · 09/06/2024 11:21

https://www.womanandhome.com/life/royal-news/carole-michael-middleton-sacrifice-kate/

Aibu to think that every parent would do the same for their child?
Aibu to think this is normal parenting?
Aibu to think that Carole & Michael gave their kids the skills during childhood to seamlessly fit into the elite world as teens?

Carole and Michael Middleton's sacrifices for Kate's childhood that she's never forgotten

Carole and Michael Middleton's sacrifices to support their children are something the Princess of Wales once spoke about on a podcast

https://www.womanandhome.com/life/royal-news/carole-michael-middleton-sacrifice-kate

OP posts:
Giveupnow · 09/06/2024 18:51

@Phantasmagorically wouldn’t you say that some of that lower standard is just what boomer parents did? Just chuck the kids outside, let them drink from a hose and if they didn’t eat their dinner went straight to their room hungry? The concept of weekend sport matches, especially for girls, for me growing up was unheard of. There was one girl that did majorettes or something but most of our class just went out on bikes. I suppose that’s the real difference in ‘class’ and upper classes exposing their children to hockey and skiing etc

ShrinkingEveryDay · 09/06/2024 18:51

QueenOfTheLabyrinth · 09/06/2024 13:59

Do you have any experience of boarding school? I have & no, parents attending every sports game is NOT common; in fact not seeing your parents at all until the next school break is actually the norm.

Kate no doubt saw her friends & teammates have no one turn up to support them SO TO HER, her parents doing that probably meant a lot to her & she views it as them sacrificing their time for her.

Edited

But the fact she was at boarding school meant they spent vastly less time with her than parents who don’t dump their kids at boarding school 😄. What bizarre logic!

QueenOfTheLabyrinth · 09/06/2024 18:52

GrannyOgre · 09/06/2024 18:07

It’s not uncommon either, if the parents live within a few hours drive, as they did. I’m not sure I would call it a sacrifice. Big matches, school plays, concerts and services etc would usually have some kind of afternoon tea or drinks reception for parents, they were as much about socialising with other parents as supporting your DC. I believe Jack Whitehall’s dad was banned from attending matches for being belligerent (same school) 😂

Besides which, weekends aren’t “free time” for the 99% of parents who don’t ship their DC off to boarding school.

It’s irrelevant whether you or I think it’s a sacrifice or not though, the point is Kate thinks it was. Kate presumably knew how busy her parents were, what their schedules where like, what other commitments they had, how many hours they put into their business & how easy (or not) it was for them to attend events not only for her but her siblings as well; she also saw how much effort (or lack thereof) other parents put in. None of us were there so it’s not for us to pass judgement.

Look at the stately home threads, being present isn’t enough; kids always know if you’re just going through the motions or if you’re genuinely going the extra mile for them & if it’s genuinely out of love.

At the end of the day, it doesn’t really matter what any of us think of the Middleton’s parenting, the only opinions that count are those of the 3 Middleton children & all 3 have said they had a lovely childhood which is successful parenting in my book regardless of what I may think of their choices.

I’m not sure why this is triggering so many people if I’m honest, I come from a poor family with parents who worked around the clock so could never attend any events & overall I’d say I had lovely childhood too.

Being financially poor or time poor doesn’t make you a crappy parent just like being well off with all the time in the world doesn’t turn you into a brilliant parent either.

SapphireSlippers · 09/06/2024 18:57

"It was then that she explained how Carole and Michael "sacrificed" their free time to cheer them on at all their sporting events"

Wow....

kanet · 09/06/2024 19:06

SapphireSlippers · 09/06/2024 18:57

"It was then that she explained how Carole and Michael "sacrificed" their free time to cheer them on at all their sporting events"

Wow....

I think that lots of her peers’ parents would not have attended. The school would have bussed them about to hockey matches or whatever and the parents would attend if they wanted. Probably loads wouldn’t attend - but the Middletons were dedicated.

OverNexus · 09/06/2024 19:12

There are 5 royal stories on their home page. Including this !

Carole Middleton's sacrifices for Kate during childhood?
Numsmetposter · 09/06/2024 19:16

A while ago a poster on here said they worked on Waitrose, and Carole Middleton once came to the front desk and barked "Mascarpone", the staff then realised she was telling them to fetch her some mascarpone.

It may not even be true but I always think of it when I see the mascarpone in asda 🤣

deeahgwitch · 09/06/2024 19:35

LadyWithLapdog · 09/06/2024 18:39

Why is W&H doing such a non-article?

I think the post just before yours by @ginasevern gives you your answer.
It states that it is sycophantic claptrap and the poster wonders if the Middletons have paid their suppliers etc.

It's just PR positive spinning, probably organised by a PR company.

QueenOfTheLabyrinth · 09/06/2024 19:38

ShrinkingEveryDay · 09/06/2024 18:51

But the fact she was at boarding school meant they spent vastly less time with her than parents who don’t dump their kids at boarding school 😄. What bizarre logic!

You're missing the point, it’s about Kate’s perception of her own childhood; boarding school was her norm so she would be comparing her parents against the parents of her peers AT BOARDING SCHOOL as that‘s all she would have known, that was her whole reality.

So many people here are framing boarding schools as the kids being “shipped off” or “dumped” but Kate evidently doesn’t feel that way about her childhood (which is brilliant) & was happy so there was never any need for her to feel aggrieved & think about alternatives.

deeahgwitch · 09/06/2024 19:40

ginasevern · 09/06/2024 18:18

Sycophantic bloody clap trap. Have the Middletons paid all those small businesses they owe money to yet? That's more to the point.

I agree.

thebestinterest · 09/06/2024 19:49

Alittlebitofchaos · 09/06/2024 11:21

https://www.womanandhome.com/life/royal-news/carole-michael-middleton-sacrifice-kate/

Aibu to think that every parent would do the same for their child?
Aibu to think this is normal parenting?
Aibu to think that Carole & Michael gave their kids the skills during childhood to seamlessly fit into the elite world as teens?

Where’s that blue blazer from that she’s wearing?

LazyGewl · 09/06/2024 19:55

ditalini · 09/06/2024 11:44

The sacrifices listed are:

  • went to sports matches their children were participating in.
  • went on family holidays
  • accompanied adult child on 3 week long work trip to very nice place so could spend time with grandchild.

These are not "sacrifices" and the going on family holidays being listed is truly weird.

I agree. They are not sacrifices. Many people - like my own mother who was a single parent - aren't able to attend sports days because they have to work all the hours to put food on the table on minimum wage.

I remember reading about someone saying that they missed meals so that their children could eat.

I am not saying that wealthy people don't make sacrifices, by the way - they absolutely do. I just don't think the "sacrifices" mentioned actually make the grade.

Pollipops1 · 09/06/2024 19:58

Have they sacrificed a few holidays to pay their suppliers?! 😆

DramaLlamaBangBang · 09/06/2024 20:06

Pollipops1 · 09/06/2024 19:58

Have they sacrificed a few holidays to pay their suppliers?! 😆

I would guess the answer to that is 'No'.

GrannyOgre · 09/06/2024 20:07

QueenOfTheLabyrinth · 09/06/2024 18:52

It’s irrelevant whether you or I think it’s a sacrifice or not though, the point is Kate thinks it was. Kate presumably knew how busy her parents were, what their schedules where like, what other commitments they had, how many hours they put into their business & how easy (or not) it was for them to attend events not only for her but her siblings as well; she also saw how much effort (or lack thereof) other parents put in. None of us were there so it’s not for us to pass judgement.

Look at the stately home threads, being present isn’t enough; kids always know if you’re just going through the motions or if you’re genuinely going the extra mile for them & if it’s genuinely out of love.

At the end of the day, it doesn’t really matter what any of us think of the Middleton’s parenting, the only opinions that count are those of the 3 Middleton children & all 3 have said they had a lovely childhood which is successful parenting in my book regardless of what I may think of their choices.

I’m not sure why this is triggering so many people if I’m honest, I come from a poor family with parents who worked around the clock so could never attend any events & overall I’d say I had lovely childhood too.

Being financially poor or time poor doesn’t make you a crappy parent just like being well off with all the time in the world doesn’t turn you into a brilliant parent either.

🙄 @QueenOfTheLabyrinth

She calls it “free time” so presumably they had a lot of free time if they could go to watch matches every week. Parents whose children are at boarding school have a lot more free time than parents with children at home…

Anyway, how is it a sacrifice to give up your free time to go socialise with other parents and see your DC? Surely those are pleasurable things to do in your spare time? It is nice that they went to every match but hardly a huge sacrifice. It will have been as much of a social event as a sporting event… Maybe lunch with parent friends, perhaps a school reception or afternoon tea with the DC afterwards.

You’re right, I wasn’t there at the time. I left school a year or 2 before she started. IME, parents often came to matches if they could, although not every week.

SapphireSlippers · 09/06/2024 20:36

kanet · 09/06/2024 19:06

I think that lots of her peers’ parents would not have attended. The school would have bussed them about to hockey matches or whatever and the parents would attend if they wanted. Probably loads wouldn’t attend - but the Middletons were dedicated.

Well if you're going to outsource your dc to boarding school attending a sports event is above and beyond
Hmm

Squidlette · 09/06/2024 20:55

My daughter likes to dance. She's in a crappy little dance group which requires we buy costumes for each new performance (which usually lasts about 2 minutes). Most of the dancing appears to be arm waving and looking thoughtful. But dd loves it.

Today was some kind of showcase. It lasted 2 hours. On a Sunday. Dd was on stage 3 minutes in total. Couldn't hear the drama kids, so dh and I had no real idea what was going on. Now THAT was a sacrifice.

MrsMitford3 · 09/06/2024 21:01

I'm not clicking on a crappy link

This seems like another of lot of the same sort of posts which have been popping up recently...

deeahgwitch · 09/06/2024 21:21

Pollipops1 · 09/06/2024 19:58

Have they sacrificed a few holidays to pay their suppliers?! 😆

👏🏻

LiterallyOnFire · 09/06/2024 22:22

Squidlette · 09/06/2024 20:55

My daughter likes to dance. She's in a crappy little dance group which requires we buy costumes for each new performance (which usually lasts about 2 minutes). Most of the dancing appears to be arm waving and looking thoughtful. But dd loves it.

Today was some kind of showcase. It lasted 2 hours. On a Sunday. Dd was on stage 3 minutes in total. Couldn't hear the drama kids, so dh and I had no real idea what was going on. Now THAT was a sacrifice.

GrinGrin

Eskimalita · 09/06/2024 22:39

Did you write the article and deliberately post it here to get views?

Eskimalita · 09/06/2024 22:40

MrsMitford3 · 09/06/2024 21:01

I'm not clicking on a crappy link

This seems like another of lot of the same sort of posts which have been popping up recently...

I reckon people are doing it to get views on the posts they write for work.

Crystallizedring · 09/06/2024 22:55

I didn't go to boarding school but my cousin's did and my ex. I know their parents went to sports days and matches. So I'm not sure that's unusual.
Family holidays? Also pretty normal if you can afford it.
Going on an all expenses paid tour with her daughter which was completely unnecessary isn't anything to be proud of.
I'm not sure that she did anything more than a normal parent but obviously Catherine appreciates her. I'm not keen on Carole though. She gives the impression of thinking she's better than everyone else.

MistAndFog · 09/06/2024 23:00

Unfortunately it is not the case for lots of children. Even in rich families often there is a lot of time at home where the nanny is the caregiver. And as for going to every sports match, plenty of parents are working shifts or weekends and can't take them, or can't even afford for them to go. Or just don't care enough to even look into clubs for them to join in the worse cases.

QueenOfTheLabyrinth · 09/06/2024 23:14

GrannyOgre · 09/06/2024 20:07

🙄 @QueenOfTheLabyrinth

She calls it “free time” so presumably they had a lot of free time if they could go to watch matches every week. Parents whose children are at boarding school have a lot more free time than parents with children at home…

Anyway, how is it a sacrifice to give up your free time to go socialise with other parents and see your DC? Surely those are pleasurable things to do in your spare time? It is nice that they went to every match but hardly a huge sacrifice. It will have been as much of a social event as a sporting event… Maybe lunch with parent friends, perhaps a school reception or afternoon tea with the DC afterwards.

You’re right, I wasn’t there at the time. I left school a year or 2 before she started. IME, parents often came to matches if they could, although not every week.

No need to eye roll & be snarky thanks, I’m sure we can have an adult conversation - even if we disagree with each other - without resorting to passive aggressive emojis.

She calls it “free time” so presumably they had a lot of free time if they could go to watch matches every week.

Well like you say that’s your presumption, for all we know it wasn’t so much free time as time they made free i.e. they took time out to attend her events but then perhaps had to catch up with work into the night to make up for it or whatever. Like I said, none of us were there however Kate - who was there - seems to view it as a sacrifice on their part so I’ll go with her recollection & take it at face value, who am I to say otherwise.

Parents whose children are at boarding school have a lot more free time than parents with children at home…

You seem to have forgotten that there are 2 younger Middleton siblings; Pippa is only a year younger than Kate but James is 6 years younger; none of the Middleton kids boarded until secondary so for the majority of the time Kate was boarding, they had one child at home so by your own reasoning, they would indeed have had less free time then.

On the face of it, it looks like they were attending Kate’s events weekly, attending Pippa’s events weekly, had a primary aged child at home & were also growing a successful business that would have needed a lot of time if you look at where Party Pieces was at that point & what it became. Then you have the rest of life’s crap.

Now do I think they deserve a medal? No. But neither do I think it’s a race to the bottom & just because they were more privileged than most, it means they didn’t have their own hardships in their own way.

Anyway, how is it a sacrifice to give up your free time to go socialise with other parents and see your DC? Surely those are pleasurable things to do in your spare time? It is nice that they went to every match but hardly a huge sacrifice. It will have been as much of a social event as a sporting event… Maybe lunch with parent friends, perhaps a school reception or afternoon tea with the DC afterwards.

Again those are all presumptions on your part, there’s nothing to say that they did socialise with other parents or attend lunches, receptions & afternoon teas afterwards. You’re painting a leisurely picture but for all we know, they went to the sporting events, cheered Kate on in the stands & then had to dash off to pick up James, attend a work meeting etc. Like I said in my earlier post, we don’t what their life was like at that point, what commitments they had etc. Just like your version of events are possible, it’s also possible that they had packed busy days & really made an effort to fit everything in which is what Kate appreciates.

It’s also a presumption that they even had parent friends; even though they had money at that point, it’s possible in my experience that they could have been looked down on by some parents due to their humble beginnings so no, it may not have been a pleasurable experience for them like you’re suggesting; it certainly wasn’t for my parents for that very reason. Again who knows, it’s all just speculation. Kate seems to appreciate the effort they made, so great.

You’re right, I wasn’t there at the time. I left school a year or 2 before she started. IME, parents often came to matches if they could, although not every week.

Well that wasn’t my experience or the experience of another poster on this thread but that doesn’t make any of us wrong.

Kate’s perception of her childhood is hers alone, I wasn’t there so I’m not going to rubbish it. If she thinks her parents made sacrifices, okay then. The important thing is she had a lovely childhood.