Just want to go home

[holly201]

We are in Greece with our 1 year old and 2 other couples with their kids and I just want to go home.

Little one is overtired and hot, hates the travel cot but sleeps well at home, all of the sunbeds in the shade have towels on them by 7am, meal times are a nightmare, I just feel so overwhelmed.

Constantly worried DD with get burned, is too hot, isn't drinking enough water etc etc I can't relax at all, not one bit.

The room is so shabby, nothing like the photos, chipped tiles, dirty floors, the balcony glass rattles like it's about to break if you touch it. We paid good money, it's tiny and grubby and just shit.

Everything feels like a fight, screams to get in her swimsuit, screams getting out, doesn't want her nappy changed, screams at nap time, if I take her to the room with AC she just wants to play not sleep, it's a fight to all get showered and dressed for the evening.

I don't even know why I'm writing this but it feels good to get it off my chest, I think holidaying abroad with a 1 year old is the worst idea I've ever had. I think I'm going to give it a miss for the next couple of years 🤦🏻‍♀️

We went away in 2022 on a much needed holiday, our ds was coming up to one. He cried constantly every day and night. He wouldn’t go in the travel cot every time we went for a walk and he fell asleep we thought ahh we can sit down somewhere, except he would wake up and scream. We were in and out of pharmacies as was so out of character for him. By day 3 we had enough we thought it was the heat. We managed to switch hotels and go further away from the coast where it was cooler (we hadn’t booked a package but booked directly and told the hotel we was in we were going home) On the day we moved my childminder text to say some of the kids had come down with hand foot and mouth. And of course of DS now had it! Dp went of to the pharmacy and we managed to get some medication to help with his mouth and it was just a case of getting through the remaining days but it was hell!

We tried again last year and went to Portugal when he was 2. He wasn’t poorly but the whole thing was just as stressful. The pool was a general no go area we figured out on our first day - not relaxing! We walked a lot let him walk a lot, went to the beach as it was cooler and he seemed to like that. We bought buckets spades and an inflatable boat from local shops and he would sit under the umbrella in his boat playing with the sand with buckets of water. He lived on chips, pasta, ice creams and snacks from the supermarkets as wouldn’t eat a full meal. We ate in turns still trying to occupy him and bed shared at night. We also had my 15 year old daughter who constantly moaned the entire time. We tried to keep busy by getting out early and letting him walk, he napped in his buggy under a sun shade where we would either lay down or grab a drink. We allowed screen time at dinner time on occasions to make it slightly more relaxing but would be back at our apartment watching Netflix by 9pm. We did manage a couple of boat trips which he seemed to like but generally it was about keeping busy and getting out and about. We do have nice memories and now laugh about what an awful time it was but we aren’t going anywhere this year!

We were a French campsite family. Started in a ridge tent when DC1 was under 1. Graduated to a mobilehome when funds allowed. DCs are all adults now so DH and I are off to a eurocamp holiday just the two of us this weekend.

My advice for now? Slow right down but be prepared to change activity regularly. At around 15 months DS was obsessed with sweeping, got him a little brush and he was in heaven sweeping our holiday home!

Can you get something like a small washing up bowl? All my DCs have had a lovely time splashing 'washing up' with a big bowl of water. It has the benefit of keeping them cool and entertained.

Good luck, celebrate small successes and next time will be better.

Yep, have many stories like this…..

my problem was, I just couldn’t be convinced that holidays with toddlers and babies are shit, was just convinced I hadn’t got the formula right. So tried all inclusive, Eurocamp, child friendly villa, holiday village, beach, countryside, etc etc….

it was shit. Every time.

until they got to about 5 and 7. Then it got great.

I mean we laugh about it now, but if I were you I’d learn from the experience & save the £££ for when they’re older. Put the cash away for hols later on when they can really enjoy it.

completely agree op. When I had my dc3 I said no holidays after 9 months and before 3. Brilliant. Complete waste of time/money and happiness.
its only a small amount of time to wait

@holly201 sounds odd but you forget about all the negatives you just mentioned and remember the best bits. I don't know what you enjoy but we got ourselves out and about, combination of the heat and lots of walks (albeit messing around moving a pushchair umbrella with the sun constantly 🤯) ours napped and we made the most of those times. We didn't stick to any routine (not an approach of many parents I know but worked for us) we didn't try and get them back to the apartment for 7pm bed, they eventually slept in the pushchair and we had an evening together every night didn't matter if we got up later. Also, we gave each other time off and took it in turns with the kids at some point everyday. Hope you enjoy the best you can xx

We used to buy a small cheap paddling pool and take it to the beach, fill with water and put a parasol over it. DD used to love it when she was a baby.

Hopefully it'll get better for you now your baby is acclimatising

Also if your resort had a no reserving sunbed policy that everyone is ignoring, then dump the towels or get the pool attendant to do it. I have no qualms about doing that sort of thing.

This(and budget) is why we stuck to caravan parks for the first 5 or so years. If you pick the family friendly ones everything is geared towards kids. It's not hot or beautiful or anything but it's a lot of fun for all of you, as long as you can embrace the tacky entertainment and chance of rain.

You were genuinely quite brave taking a 1 and 2 year old abroad. I'm sorry the holiday hasn't been what you wanted or expected so far.

I find the first few days are always a bit rough, as kids are sleepy and take time to adjust. We always pick somewhere with an active run kids club now even if that means paying for a nanny option in the club for younger ones.

We had a few holidays that were just awful without this, mostly heat, tiredness and just young children being themselves.

We went to Sani in Greece for three years in a row when DC were little. Youngest was just over one year old when we went the first time.

They were the best holidays! Everything is geared towards families and it was pristine and clean. Definitely no smoking by the pools and not a football shirt in sight.

DC went to excellent kids club for couple of hours every day, to stay out of the sun and wear them out. In the meantime DH and I could chill by the pool with books followed by a quick nookie in the room before going back to collect the DC. It was that relaxing that yes, I was up for sex . My only complain is that Sani is outrageously expensive during school holidays…

We just took our young primary aged kids abroad for the first time. We were completely baffled by the number of babies and toddlers on the flight and at the hotel and in the two hour check in queue. Amazed that so many people looked at doing that with babies and considered that it would be anything other than a torturous ordeal, never mind a holiday! We stayed UK based until now and I’m glad we saved our money. Pacing around trying to get a baby to nap under a snooze shade and being terrified of sun burn held no appeal to me. We couldn’t understand, just assumed some people so dead set on getting some sunshine that they don’t mind all that? Maybe they’re just hardier than us but our story is exactly what I feared OP.

Chalk this one up to experience OP and reconsider in five years! By age 5/7 you can plug them into an iPad on the flight, play UNO in the queues and with a hat and rash vest not worry so much about the heat. And if you’ve saved lots of money not going abroad for a while you can justify a fabulous hotel to do it in!

When I was a single parent, and the only one with a small child, I went to a family wedding in the Dominican Republic. DD was 23 months, she hated the heat, we both got savaged by mosquitoes. She wanted to be carried everywhere, it was awful. None of my family helped me with meal times but that's another story. I spent thousands for the pleasure of this. You have my sympathy OP.

Exactly why I'm not taking my two (4 and 2) abroad for a little while longer. Looking after them can be a challenge at home as it is. It's bad enough when we stay in a hotel room in the UK with them when we go to visit relatives. Why subject myself to the same thing but abroad?

You have my sympathy. I have no other advice than to take those fucking towels off the loungers and sit in the shade. I can't stand that entitled shit.

The best thing about living in Asia when dc were small was being able to “go on a plane holiday” to the good old UK where they’d be totally wowed by farm parks, tractor rides, adventure playgrounds and duck ponds because that stuff doesn’t exist where we lived- ds saw an elephant before he saw a cow- when he saw a real live sheep near my mums he was ridiculously excited and insisted on going on a walk to see them every day. We probably did get lucky with the weather but those holidays were easy compared to a few Villa holidays we did because so much to keep them occupied.

We’ve been abroad every year we’ve had the DC and even when they were small toddlers we still had a good time. We’ve always done AI resort geared towards kids though. So there’s always been a splash park or kids pool with slides or a kids club. Anything to keep them entertained. One holiday DD was about 2 and refused to eat anything but watermelon. So that’s what she had for breakfast lunch and dinner. It’s always going to be hard work, going with the expectation of it being a relaxing break is foolish. Even now ours are 8 and 10 it’s still not a relaxing holiday but we have always had a good time

We all have this romantic idea of how great a holiday will be with our babies. It’s not. It’s hard work and they hate being out of their routine, they get frightened on the flight and don’t like the heat.
we have started going abroad again now mine are over 5 , but before that just pick somewhere in the UK. It’s really not fair on them and you won’t relax/

I think our next trip abroad will be a villa or smaller hotel.

And go in May or late September when it will be lovely weather and not as hot. I'm sorry you aren't having a great time.

I think the hardest period is between 9 months and 4 years old. After that it does become easier, but with a 1 year old it can be tricky.
I think you need to speak up a bit..if the room isn't clean or as you booked, asked to be moved. If there aren't any parasols for a 1 year old, ask the life guard. If anyone needs sun protection its your little one!

First things first- do mourn the loss of holidaying pre kids. It’s a rite of passage and it’s fine to love your kid and miss the lack of spontaneity. Also remember your memory of your own holidays as kids will not be how your mother or father remembers it and will probably be from when you were a lot older.

On a practical basis we have always travelled (to see family) or holidayed since the kids were little. Just with different expectations. With hotels I think of not having to cook or clean for a week. So it’s a holiday for me in that sense. We have also done lots of city breaks. We live in a big city so we plan city breaks as we would in our own city- one activity in the morning, something to see, lunch, nap, park time and one more thing before dinner. It’s again not like an adult holiday but we did a lot of North America and Europe with small kids this way without totally losing our minds.

I also relax my expectations- as someone said if they eat chips and ice cream for a week it’s fine. The last time mine went to India (where I am from but we live in the US and DH is Indian American) my kids ate ONLY dal and rice and maybe some yoghurt. I don’t think a vegetable crossed their lips except for the one day we ordered pizza and there was tomato sauce on it. It was fine. They are fine, we survived. If she sleeps better in your bed, so be it. You can re-set everything when you are home. My kids have always co-slept on holidays when they were kids and within a day or two adjusted when back home.

I took my dc abroad aged 4 and never took them again (aged 20 now.)

They loved Haven holidays though!

I remember the first holiday with a 1 year old… we did staycations for the next 2 years. 🤣

They went to nursery for a couple of half days too. We ate a few takeaways. Had a few pub lunches, and filled in other time with trips to local petting farms and a trip on a train.

…And everyone slept through the night!

Our first holiday with DC started off badly but ended up as one of the best. Our DC were 6 months and just turning 2. We booked a very cheap week in Greece which had brilliant reviews. We arrived to find an absolute dump of a place. The cots had goodness knows what stains on them, there were cockroaches crawling everywhere and the apartment was filthy.

My usually laidback DH even found it inhabitable so he found a wonderful AI hotel nearby and moved us all there (we didn’t have much money so put it on a credit card). We had a room with a swim up pool so we could swim while the babies napped in the lovely air conditioned room. There was lovely food on tap as well as activities for the DC. And as it was so last minute, we had it for next to nothing.

That said, we do love an adventure so we had no issues carting two prams, two change bags and beach bags off for the day on the bus to explore different beaches. I look back now and wonder how we managed it - grit and determination to have a good time. The beaches were definitely preferable to the pool and we took turns - one relaxing while the other was entertaining the DC.

Son and DIL ,other son and DIL and children aged 8 months and 2 1/2 (by the time they go) are going to a Park Dean caravan in September. They have always holidayed abroad and went to Spain last year. It was hell. They have accepted that naff holidays are going to be far more enjoyable for the next few years. Holidays with small children are never relaxing in the way pre- children hidays are.