WIBU to make y7 DD to revise in half term AND help her?

[ArseholeCatIsABlackAndWhiteCat]

DD has a lot of end of year tests coming up. Yes , she is only Y7 but she's the type of kid that is lazyish but also gets upset if she doesn't do well, and there is no way she will do well without any revision bar 2/3 subjects.

I kept a couple of days free over half term for this and also helped her make revision cards, showed her how to do them,to summarise etc.

Two friends told me I was unreasonable (not in those exact words) for making her work and revise , as it's only y7 it doesn't matter,she should chill,relax and have fun. They asked if I could meet up and I said I was busy, they asked with what and that's how it came about. One of the replies was actually "oh,fuck that".

Another friend (more of an acquaintance) asked me for help as our daughters were talking about revision and I sent her the links the school provided. Then she asked for the cards to see exactly what we are doing. I showed her and then she got a bit snarky and snippy as they were too good for DD to have done herself. I said I obviously helped as she had no idea how to do them (first year she ever needed it, as SATS revision was completely different) and I didn't think it was fair to let her get on with it with no guidance. She got even snippier and said she doesn't have the time to do it and it's unfair and it should be the children's work not parents'. I mean, if it's all that independent why didn't she just get her DD to ask mine for notes and advice?

I let it all go and just internally rolled my eyes, however I got a message today from one of these people asking if "all that hard work was worth it yet" with laughing emojis. I just replied tests haven't started yet.

One lesson definitely learned, keep my mouth shut.

However WIBU on both counts? Either?

I think it's a very good idea to teach your daughter good revision skills and exam preparation. It will stand her in good stead for the next few years. Your friends don't sound like very good friends to be honest. I wouldn't bother with them if I were you!

DC both went to private schools from reception and had exams every end of summer term from year 1 onwards in different subjects - so yr 1 maybe just maths and English but by y4, would include science, geography, history etc.

It was completely expected from a v young age that they would revise over the holidays prior to the exams and by senior school level would have talks on how much work to do, revision techniques etc and schools emailed info to parents.

This is just my experience. I don't know how much difference it made doing exams at so early an age but certainly by gcse time, DC had a lot of revision experience and knew what techniques worked for them.

Im a teacher...dont do this kids aree tired and newd a break

The tests are ollocka a3nyway. They are just something to write on end-of-term reports dor parents

@RafaistheKingofClay I definitely know now for next year. We're learning as we go. Both of us.

If it turns out it helps at GCSE level(and makes her life easier in between), great!

If it turns out it was a waste of time and all bollocks like you say, we only wasted a few days over a whole year. Not the end of the world.

I was talking to her this morning and she actually enjoyed spending the time together so it wasn't a complete loss.

This is amusing because I'm in Finland and I had to teach my DD how to revise for exams at 7 years old because they have exams all the time here! So many exams, so much studying!

YANBU OP, good study skills are vital. I never learnt how to revise properly when I was in school, would just cram at the last minute, and consequently I did not do as well as I should have and regret it. You are doing something so very beneficial for your child.

You're clearly a super supportive and encouraging mum, I just wish all kids had mums like that! Don't stop doing what you're doing there's absolutely nothing wrong in helping kids with their revision. Just don't mention it to your 'friends' in future!

I'm really sorry. That was not my intention.

Aww don't apologise. It's actually made me think about how I can support my daughter. Her school keep all their books on site so I'd find it difficult to know the details of what she's been learning. But that might be something I can discuss at the next parent's evening.

I wish someone had taught me how to revise. My dad was like " well you just revise, it's simple" when I asked him, but there's an art to doing it well. And although I always sailed through exams I really learnt as I went along how to revise effectively.

Our boys haven't revised for year 7/8 exams but they tend to breeze through them. But we do make sure they do other stuff, one does lots of strategy games and reading, one does lots of engineering projects (meccanno etc) and they both do lots of sport. It won't harm a child to spend a couple of days learning to revise effectively with their parent. Provided there is lots of balance, with plenty of downtime and fun too.