Husband wants to put all his pensions in trust for kids.

[messiejessie]

My husband wants to put all his sizeable corporate pensions in trust for our 3 kids, should he die which is free of IHT.
I have a very small pension but do benefit from rental property I brought into the marriage. His point is that I wouldn't need his pension,
we are both 50 and in good health and i hope we would have a lot more living to do do and enjoy our life. Our kids are still at school or uni. The marriage is rocky,

It seems to me that he is trying to prevent me from benefiting from our joint assets if he were to die. If I died unexpectedly and left everything to him, including a substantial property and a rental there would be nothing to protect my share (for our kids) from a second marriage for example.
Would it not be fairer to put aside 5o percent of the pensions for the kids and 50 to me? In any case I wouldn't want our kids to inherit too early as they have not established their own careers yet or met life partners . I think giving kids money too early is a bad idea. (This is theoretical of course as no one is planning on dying just yet) I am very thankful we are in a good position all round financially, but nevertheless I would like some advice as I feel uneasy about being bulldozed into this.
AIBU ? Is this good financial planning for IHT? Can it be reversed?
AINBU? Should I be wary and seek financial advice from a lawyer or accountant given I have not much pension of my own ?

He can't take the money from a pension and put it in Trust, he can direct the benefits to a Trust on death. Nothing he does would stop pensions being considered in a divorce.

If you don't wish to divorce OP, then you would need to challenge any death benefit allocation on dependency. That said, if he does this, divorce seems sensible.

The law makes women entitled to it.

And so it should. I’m not planning on getting divorced, but I’ve facilitated my dh’s career by looking after absolutely everything. He’s never had to say no to any extra travelling or extra work because he had the security of me taking care of everything. And it helped him rise quickly above his peers who did have to say no to stuff.

Um, the law?

Plus the fact that many, many women sacrifice careers and decent pensions for the benefit of their family, while their husbands increase their earnings and pensions because there's someone else sorting out the rest of their responsibilities. And you think the husband should be able to say 'tough, I owe you nothing' in the event of a divorce? Not all women of course, occasionally it's the other way round, but the above should still stand.

OP's DH has plopped on the thread. Jokes.

@messiejessie

OP - first of all - don’t worry. You have time to sort this out.
If you are in England - the rules on Trusts and marital assets are such that money need to be in a trust for 5 years before they stop being considered ‘marital’.
In other words - if he files for divorce soon after moving pensions, or anything else into a trust - the Court would consider that he was preparing for divorce and was moving assets out of your reach.

I have gone through this exact situation with ExH trying to appear preparing for children’s future and setting up trusts. As my marriage was also rocky at the time - I decided that it was a clear sign that he was preparing for divorce AND trying to reduce the divorce pot in the future. For me it meant that I was better off not waiting - so I filed myself.

I don’t know your situation or your relationship - it’s only you who can make this decision. Do talk to a lawyer - they do of course like making money from divorces, so take their advice pragmatically.

Talk to H as well. You can be honest about this act tipping your decision towards divorce.
Thing is - he didn’t have to tell you about the trust. He could have done all the paperwork without your knowledge. (Which is what my Ex did, i found out by chance)
So given he did it openly - you can tell him where you are at - and maybe you two can still sort something out?

either make last push to fix things, or not

A man speaks.

Either that or a very ignorant woman. Of course you're entitled to half the assets that have been amassed during the marriage. They're joint assets, not 'his' that he graciously allows you to have access to so long as you're still having regular sex with him.

For me it meant that I was better off not waiting - so I filed myself.

Good! How did exH react?

Seek advice.
"Rocky" marriages don't tend to have the best outcomes.

Sounds like he's pre planning for divorce and trying to hide his assets from you.

Get a divorce solicitor now.

Make your dc your heirs in your will.

Amongst all the noise about tax law and beneficiary rules, this is the best advice.

He’s almost certainly planning to leave you for a girlfriend and he wants to ringfence his assets first. Trusts can be reversed post-divorce and that’s probably what he’s planning. He’s not thinking of your children he’s thinking of his post-divorce lifestyle!

Make an appointment with a solicitor this week OP. Protect yourself. Take the solicitor’s advice as to what to say to him and when. Good luck.

But a SAHW cannot provide for herself if she has given up work to facilitate her husband’s career. It’s normally a mutual decision when a wife gives up work. So if they divorce, you think it should be tough shit wife I’m keeping all the assets and you now have to provide for yourself despite having a big career break and no pension. Only an absolute selfish twat would think this is fair.

My husband and I decided together that I would give up work for 10 years (we were earning equal salaries at the time) so that I could raise our young children, run the household etc. This left him free to work long hours, be able to travel a lot for work, never have to do school drop offs or cover sick days, prioritise working his way up the career ladder to provide our family with money. Should he have decided to divorce me 9 years later, before I got back on the career ladder, you think it’s fair that he screws me over and walks away with all the money accrued during the marriage?! Ludicrous.

Luckily the law disagrees with you. And luckily my husband is a lovely fair man, who has also paid into my own pension as well as his own while I was a SAHM.

As one would expect. Took two years to actually divorce. But we shared all assets fairly according to the English laws. He thinks it’s all grossly unfair.

Thanks for all your messages here. It does seem odd as fairly recently he didn't think his very large pension pot was enough of an income stream in retirement and suggested we invested in setting up an air n b annex. More cleaning for me - no thanks ! So obviously he's planning on needing his pension when he's retired but doesn't think I'll need it if I'm a widow earlier than expected. Some of his pensions are index linked company schemes and very valuable.
i know we have other assets in his name but I don't know the whole picture and he's recently started isa's in the older kids names but would not pay in to mine.

You need to get as much information about all finances as possible and speak to a solicitor as a priority. Somebody somewhere is advising him it seems.

He’s not very kind op.
My dh cherishes me as all dh’s should cherish their wives.

I think you need to get advice quietly and ensure he doesn’t deprive you of a share in his pension.

Go and get independent financial advice

Including what would happen in the event of a divorce

The children are jointly yours so his plans make sense to me. And you have a small pension and a rental property that is extremely lucrative so you don't need his pension

Really!!

His money, his choice!!

But the pension is jointly theirs, too. Yes, it's in his name now but in a divorce it would be divided, just the same as it would be if he'd had a savings account in a bank. It's not just up to him to make that decision.

Divorce him

1 Who are you to say what someone else "needs"?
2 Its possible for the person who sets up the trust to "undo" some kinds. Its possible his plan is to divorce, get the assets business sorted then undo the trust again.

See a solicitor pronto!! This man is miles ahead of you in getting ducks in a row.

In the meantime, tell him that since he feels things need to be set up to benefit the children, you will be leaving the house and rental property in trust for them with a solicitor as trustee with the instruction that they be sold when the youngest child reaches majority (or finishes Uni) and the proceeds invested in trusts for the children.

Two can play at the assets deprivation game.

Remember in the marriage service, all that I have I give to you? Well there are quantifiable laws to back this up, one person may bring earnings to a family, one person unpaid caring or cleaning or childcare, if still has a value and is misogynistic to think otherwise.

@cannonballz

no it doesn’t. What is OP supposed to live on? Fresh air?

@messiejessie

You are doing what most women going through this sort of situation do. Which is NOT believing your H has turned into a man protecting his interests at the expense of yours.

The talk of doing it for ‘the children’ is a smoke screen. The only person who benefits from this arrangement is HIM when (or if) you divorce. Any asset put into trust will have him as a trustee. So he will be able to use them.
But - for the purposes of divorce and asset division - these assets will not exist.
While EVERYTHING in your name will be divided 50/50. Your properties, your pension, etc.

Do not fall for this manipulation. His story of saving on inheritance tax is a lie. (mine also had a story about a trust for the children. Also totally made up).

So many women around me did not believe their H’s turned into those men hiding money. And got badly burned in the end.

You are lucky he showed his hand.