How many non verbal children did you know growing up? How many do you know now?

[MaryMaryVeryContrary]

Not a goady thread and I wont be engaging with posters who want to speculate on the causes by starting debates about parenting and screen time.

But in the absence of any proper data, I’m interested to know whether others think there has been a rise in non verbal children (age 3 and over). I didn’t know any growing up, and now I know 3. So it seems to me there has been a rise but it may just be the area I live in.

Part the reason we knew a few was my sibling was premie in 1989, pre steroids for lung development. There was a group of survivors from the London hospital she was born at, including yearly meets. The level of disabilities was huge. A number had quad cerebral palsy, learning needs, deaf, blind and a lot had lung damage that led to death in teens/ childhood. Tbh the overall outcomes were so severe I was terrified of having a premie as a teen
(I had my own prem baby in the end, she’s doing ok)

It is my understanding that non verbal in not communicating verbally (via conventional speech) where as non communicative is unable to communicate. We would say that your son uses aac to communicate not that he is verbal.

There are also children who use a total communication approach where various forms of communication may be used to communicate with them and they may use some or all of these to communicate but the child may still be non verbal.

My son has useda high tech aac device too, he was still classed as non verbal.

None growing up.

I know one now but they are non verbal for physical reasons (cerebral palsy) rather than neurodiversity, and communicate very effectively with an eye gaze device.

I grew up in a small town where everyone knew everyone.

There was a local special school - the children who went there typically had down sydrome, other genetic disorders or severe cerebral palsy and would never in a million years have been able to attend mainstream (my mother worked there so I knew quite a bit about it). Lots of the children had care or medical needs. There were some with autism but what would be considered "level 3" autism.

School refusal wasn't really a thing. There was an odd child who didn't like going and truanted occasionally, it was rare.

There were school based interventions for SEN but these were focussed on academic need, not behaviour. There were consequences for poor behaviour that wouldn't be allowed now - eg i remember a teacher running a popular football club & would basically block you from attending if your school behaviour wasn't up to scratch. This was astonishingly effective but nowadays you get accused of not being inclusive if you did this.

I didn’t know any non verbal children growing up and now as an adult I know of 1, friends daughter who is coming up 6 and autistic

@clockdoc apologies, I didn't mean to offend. I simply meant that as an adult if you want to get on in life, hold down a job etc you need to be able to communicate.

None growing up

I worked as s paediatric SLT and didn’t come across any there either

@theDudesmummy also if your child does the want to be classed as non verbal most people would honor that and not use that to describe him by finding s different means although a salt in report may have difficulty but that doesn't change the fact that he doesn't communicate verbally as he uses aac.

Zero and two (family members with ASD)

None growing up. My 9 year old son is non verbal. I know several more non verbal children, but this is probably because i encounter them at my son's specialist school and club.

I'm a bit unsure how you think this is any better. The ableism is horrific.

None and now two, and I know a lot less children as an adult than I did as a child. I also knew of only two children in my entire year group at secondary school who had all the traits of ADHD (it wasn't something that was really diagnosed back then). There are twenty times that number in DS's school year with the same traits, not to mention three with Tourette's (this was virtually unheard of when I was growing up, extremely rare and can't be masked).

I knew one growing up, the sibling of a friend. That was due to profound deafness though, not autism. She went to a special school so if it hadn't been for my friend I'd never have met her.
I know of three now, because I work in schools.

None and none

0 growing up.
4 now. 1 from a mum who had him at 26 and the rest 35+. It’s well known that having babies later in life increases the likelihood of this sort of thing. I think it’s because so many wait until 30+ to start a family these days, so there’s going to be a rise in this sort of thing. The age of the father affects quality of sperm too. So two middle aged parents 35+ will surely have a greater chance of having a child with disabilities.

(And as this is mn, I know some users are living an alternative universe. So I’ll clarify I mean middle age to mean middle age, 35-45, life span 70-90 which covers most people! 10 years either way from average life span. Aging is not a mortal sin and you can’t identify your way out of it by declaring you don’t feel middle aged or that you have to start doing what you think the middle aged stereotype is).

@clockdoc sorry, once again. Please explain as I'm struggling to see what sort of job you could do if you're deliberately choosing not to speak - genuine question.

A selectively mute girl at high school who I now strongly believe was being abused by her step father. But non-verbal, none?

Loads of non verbal children are not in mainstream school now ,my son isnnt and never has been neither would I want him to be mainstream would be disastrous for him and they couldn't offer anything his excellent special school can .

It's the bit where you think it's a choice.

I was not verbal so I knew myself. There was three girls in my year at school who were non verbal .

Now I don't know any but I'm aware of three (all children)

Well obviously they are not non verbal than are they?
My son is non verbal ,he can't speak at all he's 14
.

I'm struggling to see what sort of job you could do if you're deliberately choosing not to speak - genuine question.

Well my completely non verbal
cousin doesn’t have a job. He has 1:1 24 hour care as he also can’t walk much or look after himself in any sense. He’s like a 6-9 month baby in terms of his mental capacity. He can sign thanks but does so inconsistently and he can blow kisses.

Have you never come across the idea that people can be unable to have a job?

OK. My point was that was the limit of knowledge/SEND as anyone else wouldn't have been at my school in the first place.

My brother would have counted as nonverbal until he was about four. His sister would interpret the sounds he made.

All the special schools in my LEA we have four two primary and two secondary have doubled in capacity over the past 10-15 years ,and continue to increase in capacity I'm.not sure what's going on my son also has a rare chromosome disorder.

You say that like you think it's bloody optional. Situational mutism isn't a choice, for god's sake.

Quite a few, but I went through 'unsuitable for fostering or adoption' disabled training institutions for a time. A couple of the adults that had never left were also non verbal.
Some were able to vocalize with noises but it wasn't allowed. (Tbf talking wasn't allowed most of the time either.)
If you were non verbal but 'biddable' as it was then classed, and otherwise healthy you could pass the medical to be sent to Aus for a new life.

I know three now. Two with autism, one with Angelman's, all living at home and part of their communities, but I'm in disabled, SEN, and Home ed circles.