Is ordering tap water in a restaurant rude?

[TigerOnTour]

My friend often orders tap water in restaurants and I think it's a bit rude. She also has a tiny appetite so will basically just order a side, a starter or a child's meal. I feel like we are pissing off the restaurant. Obviously we don't all have to order a bottle of champagne, but a coke isn't expensive. Friend is very wealthy, if that matters.

I don't think so, our tap water tastes nice (in my part of the country). I rarely drink fizzy juice. I'll usually order wine or a cocktail or whatever plus a tap water, but if I'm not drinking I do tend just to drink water.

Not ordering a main, or at least starter + dessert is off though. It's not exactly rude, just... inappropriate? Poor etiquette?

I'd say it depends on the situation. If the restaurant is packed, then yes, taking up a table for a salad and a water is a bit cheeky... but given what a salad actually is, they probably make a good margin on it too. Otherwise, money is money. Any cheap table is better than no tables.

Some might argue that if the restaurant is that busy, that they can afford it... it works out in the wash and probably gets factored in.

No I do not think it is. My brother runs a bar and I used to help reasonably often when required. Many people will drink simply tap water. In most parts of the country it is a requirement that bars should offer tap water (I believe that this came from the days of ecstasy. That is assuming of course that there are other people in the group eating and drinking and you have not just popped in and said give me a free tap water and sat their spending no money at all!

Behind the bar we would just assume you were the dedicated driver. We and some other bars used to offer DDs free coke/soft drinks.

Well is she ordering water because she wants it or because she's tight and resents paying to go out? Same for food - is it appetite or frugality? It's fine to order what you want rather than feeling you have to spend X amount even if it's wasted.

Why is it better etiquette to order food and then leave it because you can't eat it?

We always order tap water alongside other drinks. It's quite normal.

I don't like soft drinks so if I don't want to drink alcohol I just drink table water ( unless its a cold day then I might get a tea).

Even if I do order alcohol, I still order tap water to drink with it.

If she has a small appetite I can see why she does not want to order food she will not eat. A starter and side is probably the same cost as a main anyway.

This is actually quite a weird thing for you to be judgemental about and it makes me wonder if you just don't like her that much.

No, it's fine. A good restaurant will bring a jug of tap water without you having to ask for it.
But her fiddling about with a kid's menu is off-putting and cheapskate (and a decent restaurant wouldn't even have a children's menu!).

Sometimes I just want to drink water. Most of the time actually. it has nothing to do with money.

too many drinks you risk getting artificial sweeteners and ending up with a migraine.

if the restaurant had a more appealing alternative I would order it, but they rarely do

Oh I agree tap water alongside other drinks is fine. I just think that it's a bit off to only order tap water plus a side when you're taking up a table.

Well surely you’d just ask for a small portion of a main? A side and a starter or a child’s meal isn’t much at all.

And if you’re on a diet or something surely you work out which are cheat days.

The restaurant isn’t a charity.

Tap water is fine to order.

I don't like fizzy drinks or fizzy water.
Tap water is fine for me.

I think ordering tap water or a side dish if you're not hungry is okay, but doing both does seem a bit off.

I think pps who talk about ordering tap water alongside other drinks are missing the point. I don't think anyone has an issue with that. It's going out and only spending £8 or whatever on a side dish and nothing else that is the issue.

I was in a cafe once when a woman came in and asked for 4 glasses of tap water she bought nothing else and took them outside for her family to drink on an outside table, this is rude.
Asking for tap water with food you have paid for is not rude.

Ordering just a kids meal or starter and a tap water is cheap and embarrassing. Ordering a proper meal and a tap water is absolutely fine.

Your friend is rich because she orders tap water.

Wtf. Don't drink it if you don't want it but why on earth is drinking water rude. I do it. I don't like fizzy drinks and it'd be ridiculous to pay for bottled water when I can just drink normal water

But she is with you. Or should single people not go to a restaurant as they are taking up a table which could be taken by a couple?

If you are there and eating too, then anything she eats is a bonus on a single person table, isn't it?

And I can't remember the last time I was in a restaurant and all the tables were full anyway.

I am sure they are just glad of the custom.

But I can't help thinking that you real motivation is not concern for the restaurant owners, but just that is pisses you off that she has a small appetite.

BTW where I used to live a restaurant opened that only served starters, as they had noticed that lots of women ordered a couple or several starters rather than a main. A bit like tapas or mezze eating. So it can't be that unusual.

I'm not sure, I just think it's cheeky to use a restaurant's seating and facilities but not pay for a meal. Because what OP has described isn't a meal.

I am always ordering tap water - surely refilling a jug is more environmentally friendly, than producing/disposing a bottle. But, the post is not actually about the water, it is about your friend and spending habits. If she frequents the place multiple times a week, I think that is ok and not "cheap".

I hate coke and much prefer tap water at room temperature to any other soft drink. I’ve never managed to find a soft drink worth paying for.

Presumably you are ordering a full meal and a drink so the restaurant will be in profit, exactly the same as if you had been eating with your child rather than another adult

I think it’s fine as long as it’s not the only thing she is ordering, the other things can be either food or drink.
a coke may not be expensive but if she doesn’t want a coke why should she order it and if she wants to have water then tap water is perfectly decent and better for the environment.

I always order tap water - prefer it and more eco than bottled. But I always order proper meals too - that is the issue here. Maybe you need to go somewhere else together as she’s clearly not that into food

Restaurant Manager here, absolutely not rude at all and the servers don't even think twice about it. I've always been told to offer Water automatically especially to Families!

Depends, tap water with a meal no not rude and most restaurants provide water for the table as standard anyway. Ordering just tap water is rude.
I often order tap water with a meal if I'm not drinking alcohol because that's honestly what I prefer to drink with food, not keen on coke etc.