Sleeping arrangements at childminders

[Dinoswearunderpants]

Hello

I'm trying to work out AIBU here. My DS is 3 and when he sleeps at the childminders, he sleeps in his buggy.

I've never particularly liked this arrangement but there are several kids (within the ration limits) who also sleep in their buggies so I haven't said anything.

The childminder told me the other day that my DS soiled his self whilst asleep. She explained she was in the garden with other children (who we not sleeping) and didn't get to my son in time.

She said he was calling for her when she did come in to check on them. I don't know how long they were left alone to sleep but it has to be for some time as he's usually pretty good with his toilet training.

It makes me sad thinking my poor DS was calling for help and she wasn't there. I didn't say anything as I just wasn't sure what to say but now thinking about it (she told me 2 days ago) I'm really annoyed.

We won't see her for three weeks now due to holiday but should I bring it up when we return?

It's that awkward situation as I know my son is very happy there. She does generally care for them very well but this sleeping situation just doesn't feel right.

It's not ideal, especially for a 3 year old (not SO bad for babies) & I wouldn't like it, BUT it's pretty common and to me, it's not enough to move him from a childminders he's happy with.

He's 3, does he need to nap there??

Yes he does need to nap. He still very much likes his sleep.

So you think it's fine for him to be left alone in the house whilst she's outside with others?

A childminder setting is supposed to replicate home life. If you had a baby sleeping and older siblings at home, you'd have similar things happening too. My gut reaction is that if you have more than one child, sometimes they both need you at the same time. My DC is older but babies sleep in their buggies at our CM too, outside if dry enough.

What did she say to you? Where would you prefer your DC slept if the CM also has older children woh want to be outside.

Legally, the childminder must be able to hear or children at all times. Even when they are asleep.
it is a legal requirement as per the eyfs. I was an outstanding childminder for 13 years, until very recently. The childminder should be using baby monitors when the children are asleep and she cannot see them.

Could she hear him from outside but was too busy to come or didn't hear him until she wandered inside? I mean od put my little ones down for a nap and then be in a different room to the with the other kids, or in the garden if I could hear so I think it's
A. Could she reasonably hear them?
B. How often was she checking on them?
C. Could they get out the buggy and this what trouble could they get into unsupervised?

That's what I assumed too.

I think I need to ask more questions. I don't know how long he was left alone for. I'd never expect her to be hovering over him whilst he slept but for him to be calling out for the toilet and her not come in time, doesn't sit right.

Childminders must keep children within sight and hearing at all times.This is set out in the EYFS. So, no.He shouldn't be left alone in the house. I'm a childminder and if my little mindee is asleep ,I stay inside with the other children or she sleeps outside whilst we're out there.
My mindees sleep in pushchairs until the age of 2- I don't have room for cots. After that, they go on a sheet on the sofa with a blanket over them.

But when there are other children there will always be times she can’t be there immediately. It’s not ideal but it’s life with multiple children to care for.

I'm a childminder. EYFS requires us to be able to hear or see the children at all times. I wouldn't move him if he's is happy but I would ask CM to ensure she is in sight or sound of him while he's sleeping

As a parent I wouldn't be happy with this. It's neglectful. At least your ds can communicate though and if he seems at all unhappy I would look for alternative arrangements.

Sleeping in the buggy is fine. Sleeping alone while she's outside is not fine imo.

I agree. As much as I prefer him sleeping in his cot, I know that's not an option there. But she should be able to hear from if he calls out.

I would not be happy with this. The childminder needs to be able to at least hear the children at all times and he really shouldn’t be left in the house by himself especially as she wasn’t coming to him when he called for help. I also wouldn’t be happy with my child napping in a buggy unsupervised, that’s not safe and depending on the length of nap surely not comfortable. He should be napping in a cot, bed or mat and able to lie flat.

I’d move him, seems like lazy childcare which could end up in a dangerous situation.

The buggy wouldn't bother me but ignoring him until he soiled himself would be a deal breaker. Unless he had diarrhoea or he only gives you a couple of minutes' notice.

Soiling happens. Wouldn't spend much thought about that.
Mine were too big to sleep in a pram at 3. I would ask for another arrangement.

Sorry I'd be absolutely fuming if that was my child. He should be in her view and earshot. I would never send my little one to a child minder but I see what they are like at stay and plays and they sit their chatting on their phones and show no interest in the children. They let them cry and all sorts. One kid fell over last week and i was comforting them as the childminder was nowhere to be seen.
Saying this, there are some good childminders out there so can't tar them all with the same brush.

Was he strapped in to the pram? Otherwise why wouldn’t he have just gone to the toilet or potty by himself? Apart from the buggy being unsafe to sleep in, being strapped in and not supervised is also unsafe, especially if he was trying to get out to use the toilet. He could have tipped up and be trapped in it and the childminder wouldn’t know.

How many other children is she watching?

She should be able to hear him so maybe ask her about getting a baby monitor.

Why is a buggy unsafe to sleep in?

Sleeping in buggy fine. Not hearing him when he was calling for her... Absolutely not fine.

Sleeping in a buggy unsupervised is dangerous. If he’s not strapped in he could roll out and hurt himself, if he is strapped in he could tip it up trying to get out and hurt himself or get trapped underneath. Supervised is ok, like on walks or if you’re close by. Babies definitely shouldn’t sleep in them because of the safe sleep guidelines, they should be flat on their backs, although this is a 3 year old so doesn’t apply here.

I'm a childcare provider and would NEVER let children have unsupervised sleep or sleep in pushchairs. YANBU, this is lazy.

At the absolute very least, she should have a baby monitor so if she needs to take another child outside or to the toilet or whatever, she can hear them!