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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think it’s a crime to pretend to be a registered doctor?

140 replies

Domino34 · 21/05/2024 22:53

Keep this short and sweet, please help me out!
I discovered that the ‘psychotherapist’ that ‘works for the nhs’ I’ve been having therapy sessions on the phone with, was actually not a doctor at all. Payed for by DH. I think I’ve been a victim of coercive control. Yet another tactic to manipulate me and be in a position of power. It sounds crazy, I know! My question is, is it a crime in the same way where if somebody pretended to be a police officer? I feel like my mind has been violated. I haven’t done anything about this. . . What can I do?

OP posts:
TwattyMcFuckFace · 21/05/2024 23:27

Domino34 · 21/05/2024 23:24

The person that sent me the video is the mutual friend.

Show quote history

And have you told them?

mathanxiety · 21/05/2024 23:27

Domino34 · 21/05/2024 23:12

Not necessarily having an affair, but the woman is known to him yes, and I was speaking to her for a while and I thought she was a therapist/doctor paid for by him, he arranged the whole thing. She pretended to be a therapist, starting off the conversation with ‘hi it’s doctor such and such’ to extract confidential information from me to pass on to him. And yes he left when I discovered this.

You need to take this straight to the police.

FreshStar · 21/05/2024 23:29

All you need to do is tell the police you’re not 100% sure what happened, it’s on them to find the answers and it’s absolutely normal for you to feel confused

ButWhatAboutTheBees · 21/05/2024 23:32

Your Husband feels like the bigger issue which needs reporting and from there an investigation will reveal if she is lying

Dr is a title which can be used by those with doctorates in many subjects

Vimtoad · 21/05/2024 23:34

What sort of information did she extract or try to extract.

Original poster
Domino34 · 21/05/2024 23:35

Vimtoad · 21/05/2024 23:34

What sort of information did she extract or try to extract.

Things about how I feel about DH, which as you can guess I had things to say which could of put me in danger if it angered him as he is an awful person. about my past, about my father who I have no contact with. Lots of sensitive information I wouldn’t want anyone else to have.

OP posts:
Original poster
Domino34 · 21/05/2024 23:36

Domino34 · 21/05/2024 23:35

Things about how I feel about DH, which as you can guess I had things to say which could of put me in danger if it angered him as he is an awful person. about my past, about my father who I have no contact with. Lots of sensitive information I wouldn’t want anyone else to have.

Show quote history

And again, offering to supervise my baby with DH, which I thought at the time as super strange and very unprofessional

OP posts:
StormingNorman · 21/05/2024 23:45

Please @Domino34 speak to the police about the possibility this may have been an attempt to abduct your child.

  • the “therapist” tried to convince you to grant him access without you present.
  • he fled abroad when you discovered what was happening - suggests he felt he needed to avoid severe consequences.
  • his parents live outside the UK. Could help house and raise the child for him.

These are big red flags.

Original poster
Domino34 · 21/05/2024 23:52

StormingNorman · 21/05/2024 23:45

Please @Domino34 speak to the police about the possibility this may have been an attempt to abduct your child.

  • the “therapist” tried to convince you to grant him access without you present.
  • he fled abroad when you discovered what was happening - suggests he felt he needed to avoid severe consequences.
  • his parents live outside the UK. Could help house and raise the child for him.

These are big red flags.

You are right, only he has never directly asked to spend time with her without me present, and baby has no passport. This happened a couple of months ago. It took me a while to even process what has happened. Have cut all contact for mine and babies physical and emotional safety. I was just wondering whether I should report it really as I’ve had no outside input.

OP posts:
bridgetreilly · 21/05/2024 23:55

I had NHS counselling. It never occurred to me that anyone would think the therapist was a doctor.

Original poster
Domino34 · 22/05/2024 00:02

bridgetreilly · 21/05/2024 23:55

I had NHS counselling. It never occurred to me that anyone would think the therapist was a doctor.

Yes well I apologise for getting therapist and doctor mixed up? The point is I thought I had a genuine counsellor, who introduced herself as a doctor. But she is neither a doctor or counsellor she doesn’t even have a job. Imagine talking to someone you thought was your counsellor only to find out it’s some sick game your ‘husband’ has been playing all along.

OP posts:
Original poster
Domino34 · 22/05/2024 00:03

Domino34 · 22/05/2024 00:02

Yes well I apologise for getting therapist and doctor mixed up? The point is I thought I had a genuine counsellor, who introduced herself as a doctor. But she is neither a doctor or counsellor she doesn’t even have a job. Imagine talking to someone you thought was your counsellor only to find out it’s some sick game your ‘husband’ has been playing all along.

Show quote history

Needed counselling, received more trauma. 😅🤦🏼‍♀️

OP posts:
isthisodd4 · 22/05/2024 00:03

So sorry OP. This is absolutely insane. I would also say police. Goodluck

Hairyhat · 22/05/2024 00:04

Are you sure your baby has no passport? Could the father have obtained one without your permission? Is he on the birth certificate?

Original poster
Domino34 · 22/05/2024 00:04

isthisodd4 · 22/05/2024 00:03

So sorry OP. This is absolutely insane. I would also say police. Goodluck

You’re right. It is absolutely insane, I wanted to see if others would think this too.

OP posts:
lhlh · 22/05/2024 00:05

Police.
and get your child noted as a potential abduction

TheChosenTwo · 22/05/2024 00:07

When you sent the photo of this woman around, who did you send it to? Your friends/family? Trusted people?
Very small world that it just happened to be someone that knew her. Can you trust your circle?
Sorry, this thread has many twists and turns.
how do you know she has no job at all?

Original poster
Domino34 · 22/05/2024 00:08

Hairyhat · 22/05/2024 00:04

Are you sure your baby has no passport? Could the father have obtained one without your permission? Is he on the birth certificate?

He is on the birth certificate, although contact has been stopped to protect baby and I. I think I will go to citizens advice to see what I can do as he has broke every rule in the book in terms of violence, emotional abuse etc.

OP posts:
Original poster
Domino34 · 22/05/2024 00:12

TheChosenTwo · 22/05/2024 00:07

When you sent the photo of this woman around, who did you send it to? Your friends/family? Trusted people?
Very small world that it just happened to be someone that knew her. Can you trust your circle?
Sorry, this thread has many twists and turns.
how do you know she has no job at all?

i sent it to a trusted friend that lives in the same small town I knew this woman to be in. Everyone knows everyone there. My friend then called this woman so I could listen in and I confirmed it to be the same woman that I’d been talking to as a counsellor, I the. Played the voicemail of the doctor to my friend, and she confirmed it to be the same woman in the video. I’d lost contact with all my friends for years as I was isolated away from them by this man.

OP posts:
StormingNorman · 22/05/2024 00:13

@Domino34 You are not overreacting. This should all be recorded with the police tomorrow.

I’m pleased you and baby have been safe for a few months since this happened, but it is still worthwhile having an official record. Just in case you ever need it.

The poster above mentioned getting your child noted as an abduction risk with the police too.

You can’t be too careful when it comes to these shitty men!

The police will be quite familiar with some nationalities doing this as there aren’t the legal arrangements to bring the children back. They will take you seriously for both yours and your child’s safety.

Original poster
Domino34 · 22/05/2024 00:14

StormingNorman · 22/05/2024 00:13

@Domino34 You are not overreacting. This should all be recorded with the police tomorrow.

I’m pleased you and baby have been safe for a few months since this happened, but it is still worthwhile having an official record. Just in case you ever need it.

The poster above mentioned getting your child noted as an abduction risk with the police too.

You can’t be too careful when it comes to these shitty men!

The police will be quite familiar with some nationalities doing this as there aren’t the legal arrangements to bring the children back. They will take you seriously for both yours and your child’s safety.

Thank you so much. It does play on my mind, being extra careful about keeping my doors locked etc. constantly on edge.

OP posts:
foxidale32 · 22/05/2024 00:17

I would think that if you're advertising yourself online as a Dr and acting like you're able to give people psychotherapy when you're not actually trained or have the qualifications then that surely is fraud

But if he's just given you a mobile number or got this woman to call you and say hi I'm dr Brenda your husband has booked me for you.
Then i would think it's more likely to come under domestic abuse, coercive control et cetera.

But i have no legal knowledge except google.
Best to speak to 101 or like others said womens aid

Original poster
Domino34 · 22/05/2024 00:39

foxidale32 · 22/05/2024 00:17

I would think that if you're advertising yourself online as a Dr and acting like you're able to give people psychotherapy when you're not actually trained or have the qualifications then that surely is fraud

But if he's just given you a mobile number or got this woman to call you and say hi I'm dr Brenda your husband has booked me for you.
Then i would think it's more likely to come under domestic abuse, coercive control et cetera.

But i have no legal knowledge except google.
Best to speak to 101 or like others said womens aid

Thanks; it was the latter! Looking back now, I used to be so upset at all the horrible things he was doing, but he used to gaslight and make me feel as if it was all my fault. One day he said if you don’t get counselling we will get divorced. I found you a counsellor. And there we have it. Womens aid will be my first point of call.

OP posts:
IdisagreeMrHochhauser · 22/05/2024 00:48

Clinical psychologists have to have a doctorate and then can call themselves dr. She could have a doctorate and then be entitled to call herself doctor even if currently unemployed. No idea if that helps.

Bjorkdidit · 22/05/2024 07:26

ButWhatAboutTheBees · 21/05/2024 23:32

Your Husband feels like the bigger issue which needs reporting and from there an investigation will reveal if she is lying

Dr is a title which can be used by those with doctorates in many subjects

This. Coercive control is a crime, its him you need to report.

The therapist might be truthful about her qualifications, I know lots of people who are entitled to use the Dr title and work for the NHS without being medical doctor, the title covers many more roles than medicine.