To have done a dash?

[Flushit]

Will try to keep it short…

Been subletting a room from a friend of a friend for 18 months. Let’s call her Chardonnay. She’s on the lease for the flat, I am not and pay her cash, and gave her a month deposit.

She’s quite ‘type A’ and tricky at times, but was okay until her boyfriend dumped her 6 months ago - then she became really moody and unpleasant. Yelling at me and other flat-mate for the smallest of things. Relations broken down entirely almost. I mentioned maybe moving and she hit the roof and declared she’d need 3 months notice, I was to pay for a professional clean of my ( clean, tidy room)… and find a replacement lodger for the room.

So when Chards was at work Monday, I went with a friend and moved all my stuff out. I then sent a message telling her I’d be gone by the time she was back. My rent ( which includes bills) was due this Friday but she has my months deposit still.

Chardonnay went mad, according to other housemate. Left work to come back and catch me but I was long gone, and assumed she wouldn’t give back me back my deposit anyway so we’re quits.

She’s steaming, telling people I left her in the lurch, that I owe her money etc. that she had to leave important work meeting to come back that day.

YABU - the grown up thing would have been to say goodbye in person and stay 3 months.

YANbU - you owe her nothing and it was fine to do a flit.

YANBU. I don't blame you. Why should you have to deal with that nightmare. Who needs the stress of a home like that.

And never have a friend called Chardonnay and refer to her as Chards

Well, she doesn't, does she? The friend isn't actually called either of those things.

I doubt she's allowed to sublet in her agreement, so it's completely at her own risk.

YANBU at all. She had no proper tenancy agreement with you and she could have thrown you out at any time. I'd have done a runner as well.

You don't owe her money. You left her the deposit in lieu of rent. Unless you trashed the room, all's fair and square.

And if it's not in the scheme it's not an actual deposit, she's an absolute chancer and would never have given it back to you.

YANBU. Fuck around and find out and she found out.

YANBU what goes around comes around. The rental scene in London is like the Wild West anyway.

When it's the other way around and a live in landlord wants to get rid of their tennant, people are quick to say give 2 weeks notice etc. So I think leaving your 1 month deposit is plenty. You've basically paid an month rent. So ignore it. She made it difficult for you to live with her, so it's her problem you decided to leave.

If you were paying rent monthly then you only needed to give one month's notice. Your deposit effectively covers this.
https://www.gov.uk/rent-room-in-your-home/your-lodgers-tenancy-type

She was a lodger. Zero rental security even if the registered renter had permission to have lodgers. No requirement in law for a notice period or a deposit, either.

You owe her nothing. Tell her to shove it where the sun don't shine and enjoy your new home

Presumably the room was left as it was when you moved in?

If so, you owe her nothing without a contract.

She's had a month upfront so that covers a months notice period.

As for finding a replacement tenant, well she's on crack, that not how it works lol. She's got a month to find someone for the room she wants to sub let hasn't she.

One months notice is plenty (I don't think you would be legally obliged to give her any in such an informal agreement) and in effect you have given her one months notice by letting her keep the deposit.

You have done nothing wrong - just pass the message back "Yes keep the deposit in lieu of notice" (and privately think and have a nice life bye bye!)

Doing a flit is not ok. But she is way OTT and unreasonable for her to make the demands she did. Not up to you to find a replacement for yourself for example.

Whilst I don’t know whether I’d have done a flit, she doesn’t have any recourse against you. She could have chucked you out at any time - and probably would have if she’s as volatile as you say - so can’t complain that you decided to leave without notice.

I would concentrate on practical things now. Have you ensured your bank, credit card provider, mobile network etc. have your new details? It would be good to minimise the amount of post you have going to her address in case she keeps anything urgent from you.

Pretty much this. Getting bad mouthed around your friendship group is the price you pay for flitting.

Have you lost money on this by losing your deposit?

She has a month’s deposit in lieu of notice. I don’t think she has a leg to stand on seeing as it was a cash arrangement and no lease. OP, don’t lose any sleep over it.

hope your new place is lovely and stress free OP.

Why would she want you to find a new flatmate if you’re leaving? Surely she’d want to make sure it was someone who she liked- or was there a whole audition process you had to facilitate? Very odd. I feel sorry for your old flatmate.

Afaik, lodgers don’t have to give notice. Equally the homeowner can kick out lodgers with no notice. There’s no tenancy agreement, you don’t have the same rights as a tenant, nor the same obligations. Presumably she didn’t inform the actual owner. You owe her nothing. She’s talking shit saying you had to give 3 months notice. Even tenants only have to give a month.

No, it was the cost of a month. We don’t really have mutual friends as such just in a bigger circle. No buggy to not see her again, and my mates aren’t her mates, I can’t think of one who would feel the need to side with her

Sod that for a game of soldiers. You did the right thing.

Ironically it’s sooooo close to her real name, posh parents trying to be different I think!

Sounds like she expects the benefits of a formal agreement without providing any of the assurances that go with it. Fuck that. You can have a 3 month notice period if you sign up for one. Not otherwise.

Chardonnay had become abusive this is the karma for her own bad behaviour

i don’t think the people commenting understand the reality of insecure subletting. I would have done the same OP. She wouldn’t have given you 3 months notice and I’m surprised you even had a deposit. I’ve been in a similar sublet situation twice and to be honest it was hell, never again.