He has changed since this disagreement.

[Someoneinthegrass]

Newish man of a year has been asking me to send him a "photo". Things are sexual between us so it's not as if he has never seen "it" before. Anyway I did not send one and he has asked a few times since and one night I sent the photo but then regretted it 5 minutes later so I deleted before he had a chance to see it.

He has clearly been a bit off with me since all whilst telling me to resend it and it has now been a few weeks.

AIBU to have deleted it?

AIBU for not resending it since I had already sent it?

Or

AIBU for not sending him a photo when he first asked?

How on earth could you possibly be unreasonable?!

Sounds like a saddo with no respect for your boundaries. I have a personal rule never to send sexy pics as it’s too risky, so if someone was off with me because i didn’t do what they thought I should do, they would be gone without hesitation. It’s a bit pathetic anyway, I’d choose to see someone’s naked body in the flesh every time.

I would dump him. Probably wouldn't even bother telling him why, would just block and let him figure it out for himself.

Your boundaries should not be determined by what other people are comfortable doing. You are not comfortable with sending explicit photos and there is nothing wrong with that.

Tell him you do not want to send photos and could he stop asking you for them. If that's a deal breaker for him then be thankful you found out now that he doesn't respect your boundaries and let him go.

He doesn't get to tell you to resend it. He doesn't get to demand you do something you're not comfortable with. He has no respect for your boundaries.

Deffo don’t send one. You don’t know what he might do with it… you’d never sleep again surely. Your gut is clearly screaming at you to not do it… listen to it OP! X

Send him a photo of a random fanny off the internet and say cheerio.

That would end it for me. He has no respect for your boundaries. Of course you were right not to. It's a risky thing to do. And now he's off with you I think you were doubly right as he sounds like the type who might be tempted by revenge porn.

Major bloody ick.

A man who’s so desperate and entitled that he thinks you’re there purely to titillate him, and has an actual sulk when his nagging for personal porn isn’t met.

I wouldn't like this at all. YANBU

Maybe Fanny Craddock?

This. Honestly, OP, what is attractive in a man who nags and sulks because you won’t send him wank fodder?

YANBU. You don't owe him photos. If people do decide to share photos with a partner, it should be because it's a fun, mutually enjoyable experience, not because they're being pressured to do it. And anyone who then acts annoyed because they didn't get what they want is just showing how entitled and selfish they are.

If he cared about how you felt about it, he'd have backed off as soon as it was clear that you weren't comfortable sending a photo. He doesn't need one and you don't owe him one. To be honest it sounds like he doesn't respect your feelings or boundaries, and either doesn't understand or doesn't care about how vulnerable/risky it can be to send stuff like that.

I would be reconsidering whether this is the right person for you.

Fanny Chmelar 🤣

Ugh god no

Please do the human fanny's above

No way would I send pics to some bloke I'd known a reasonably short time. Really dumb move. You've no idea what he'd do with them if things went belly up and sulking cos you won't is really unattractive

On point.

🤣🤣🤣

@Someoneinthegrass @Createausername1970

maybe this will float his boat 🤭

Do not feel guilty
He should not be asking. You for photos it's disrespectful and that's what Instagram is for

Why are all your options that you are at fault? He is at fault

Sounds like he has no respect for your boundaries, if things are sexual between you then sure he can ask, but as soon as you said no that should of been the end of it and he should of respected your answer. There's a reason your instincts are telling you not to do it, he sounds like a gross man child who sulks when he doesn't get his own way, do you really want to be with someone like that?!

I remember your thread, you posted a couple of weeks ago.

Has anything changed since the last thread?

@drusth Sorry, what thread was that?