Private scan scared of cancer

[Musshkina]

I’m so scared I have stomach cancer. I’m mid 30s. I paid for private ct which doctor has just said is normal but this is the report. AIBU to still be terrified that it could be stomach cancer?

@daisypond what do you mean?

OP, I have occasional bursts of health anxiety. It's a post-menopause condition for me, and I know what it is. So when I have a moment of looking at a lump or bump or new bruise or having a headache that cripples me, my first reaction is to assume that it's something that is going to kill me. I mentally check my Will, I'm making sure my filing is up to date, whilst checking whatever it is that I'm sure is killing me on a second by second basis.
Then I stop and think. Because I KNOW it's health anxiety, I can rationalise that, if it doesn't get better within a week/month/day (depending on what it is), I can always take it to the doctor at that point, I can ignore it until then. And it ALWAYS goes away.
So I think that getting yourself properly diagnosed with health anxiety, getting some medication to help you straighten your thoughts out, and just knowing that you are prone to catastrophise small medical events will help you a lot more than circling around an absence of any constructive diagnosis. Because you cannot prove a negative. This is your head telling you you're ill, when you're not.

The anxiety may well be triggered by other events in your life (as it is with me), so getting some help will enable you to understand what is going on when you think this way.

OP do you take Omeprazol or similar? Lots of indigestion remedies? They can cause thickening as well, it's nothing to be alarmed about. That's how they work to relieve acid indigestion.

What else are you doing with your life, apart from worrying about your health?

As I’ve said, I’ve cancer twice - the same one, that then returned - but I work full time, go out, see friends, look after my family, go on holiday, study, learn a new language, go to exhibitions, do my hobbies, etc. There are definitely times when I worry about my health and get depressed - and the constant hospital appointments and blood tests are anxiety-making - but I’ve had therapy to try to cope with that, and I also take medication, and am in various support groups.

You are missing out on so much actual life that you have right now. You’re lucky.

@daisypond literally nothing. I get up and sit in the same chair all day long, googling and worrying. Go to bed and repeat.

Surely you take your child to school and collect them?
Cook meals? Read to your child? Talk to her or him? Talk to your mum and dad?
Do housework?
Go shopping?
Take your child out to places?

@TheShellBeach my parents do it all 😢

@daisypond I'm so sorry you've had cancer twice.

Why don't you at least care for your child?
And where is the child's father?

@Musshkina have you ever worked?

@TheShellBeach I feel incapable. He's at "our" house with our youngest child.

@TheShellBeach yeah I worked full time before kids and I worked 2 days a week as a dental nurse up until a couple of months ago

@TheShellBeach what a stupid question. Are you always so judgemental and quick to victim blame? I suppose you’re the type of person who asks themselves why depressed people don’t just pull their finger out 🙄

Eh? Which question?

How are you feeling today @Musshkina?

Have you started to take the medication for anxiety?

@TheShellBeach yeah I've started an antipsychotic and an antidepressant. Very bad day today, had another Ct scan now I'm crying and shaking on sofa. I can't swallow food properly it hurts I'm sure it's cancer I'm sure. Waiting for Crisis team to visit again

How and why have you had another ct? That is crazy and who did the referral? Do you have spare money for every test going repeatedly until you find something bad. Can I ask gently if these issues are behind why you now live separately to your partner and child, or is it since moving out?

@LIZS last week was a private one, this was an nhs one that a&e referred me for. Yeah I've been living with mum due to these issues

Did they know you had already and one?

It seems mh is more of a priority though, as nothing physical will get resolved until you are in a more receptive state to accept the results.

But you should have told them you'd already had a scan. The NHS is struggling. You didn't need another one.

How will another scan help your anxiety?

I urge you again to look at the anxiety uk link I posted previously

Do you take Omeprazole at all OP? Or anything similar? I did ask you up thread but you didn't answer. It does have the effect of thickening the stomach lining.

You need serious psychological help.

Your (ex?)partner and youngest child are living apart from you and your older child, your older child is being entirely cared for by your parents.

Your life is being ruled by "cancer" more than a lot of actual fucking cancer patients.

It's cancer isn't it the stomach thickening proves it's cancer what can I do the crisis team won't help